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#22
10-08-2007, 10:53 PM
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Re: How to become the Alpha Male???
[ QUOTE ]
I think using less question marks would help too. [/ QUOTE ] I think posting less useless posts would help as well, because I'm going to do what I want to do, right??????? For those that are married and have achieved alpha status, and have nothing productive to say, please don't post. But those with some good advice, I would love to hear your input.... I just think there is a lot to this idea.... There was a guy in my fraternity that was fat, not-good looking, but was so self assured of himself, that he got girls.... It was a site to see.... All the guys that he was a little bi.tch, and hated him because of his cockiness, but he got girls and it made me livid.... Do you think alpha and beta males are the way they are by birth, or by their childhood.... I will bare my soul on this one.... I think I was born an alpha groomed by my confident parents, but growing up, I took school as priority number 1. I also was very skinny, and entered highschool at 5'3", 98 lbs, and was even picked on by the girls. I kicked ass in school though. But throughout the years, I hit a late growth spurt and started hitting the gym. My mission was to combine brains and brawn.... Now I'm 5'10" 205 lbs, and can bench well over 3 plates, but I am shy around the girls. It drives me f'in crazy. I'm alright talking to them, but asking them out is a whole different situation. I guess this isn't high school anymore now that I'm 25, and I shouldn't let this get to me, but I hate going out downtown, and seeing deushes with hot girls. Some hot girls will even come on to me, ask me to dance or something, but I just don't know what to say. I'm trying to live alcohol and GHB free now, so it inherently makes this harder. So I want to become as alpha as possible, and seize opportunities with women that I have should of had, long, long ago..... Not to mention, when is poker is over, and possibly enter the business world, being the alpha male will help immensely in furthering my career and success, that is proven. Thanks again everyone for your patience with my posts. 
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#23
10-08-2007, 11:12 PM
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Re: How to become the Alpha Male???
Well try visualization...Visualize what things you will say before asking someone out...Visualize yourself successful then go and try it out on the person you visualized dating...invite them in an open ended way but have an immediate backup plan if they take you up on your invitation. Then know what and where you plan on going beforehand but stay flexible in case they want to go out but don't like the proposed plan...(Visualization: athletes do it to get good sports performance results...don't see why you can't try it in a social situation...it helps simulate confidence until confidence becomes natural)...Good luck!
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#24
10-09-2007, 12:42 AM
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Re: How to become the Alpha Male???
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] I think using less question marks would help too. [/ QUOTE ] I think posting less useless posts would help as well, because I'm going to do what I want to do, right??????? For those that are married and have achieved alpha status, and have nothing productive to say, please don't post. But those with some good advice, I would love to hear your input.... I just think there is a lot to this idea.... There was a guy in my fraternity that was fat, not-good looking, but was so self assured of himself, that he got girls.... It was a site to see.... All the guys that he was a little bi.tch, and hated him because of his cockiness, but he got girls and it made me livid.... Do you think alpha and beta males are the way they are by birth, or by their childhood.... I will bare my soul on this one.... I think I was born an alpha groomed by my confident parents, but growing up, I took school as priority number 1. I also was very skinny, and entered highschool at 5'3", 98 lbs, and was even picked on by the girls. I kicked ass in school though. But throughout the years, I hit a late growth spurt and started hitting the gym. My mission was to combine brains and brawn.... Now I'm 5'10" 205 lbs, and can bench well over 3 plates, but I am shy around the girls. It drives me f'in crazy. I'm alright talking to them, but asking them out is a whole different situation. I guess this isn't high school anymore now that I'm 25, and I shouldn't let this get to me, but I hate going out downtown, and seeing deushes with hot girls. Some hot girls will even come on to me, ask me to dance or something, but I just don't know what to say. I'm trying to live alcohol and GHB free now, so it inherently makes this harder. So I want to become as alpha as possible, and seize opportunities with women that I have should of had, long, long ago..... Not to mention, when is poker is over, and possibly enter the business world, being the alpha male will help immensely in furthering my career and success, that is proven. Thanks again everyone for your patience with my posts. [/ QUOTE ] If you will accept that alphas are a product of their outcomes, you will see. Many alpha males "luck" into their status early in life. By that, I mean that they were either born with a certain athleticism or physical prowess or they are the product of growing up with the right friends and being part of the "cool" group. The problem is that alpha male status leads to a certain arrogance which can cause a lack of preparation and work ethic. This eventually catches up to the alpha and brings about his fall. This is why there are so many alphas from high school that degenerate into complete losers that no woman outside the alpha's hometown would desire. When this fall from alpha status occurs, it is normally the result of arrogance breeding apathy. Likewise, the reverse also happens. Confidence is the key to alpha status. One needs to know what gives him confidence. If that is the following: -A good physique -A high perceived intelligence In the above case, it doesn't take rocket science to figure out that the guy needs to go to the gym and study hard. This is not because women require the above. It is because you require it in order to be confident (or whatever your criteria are). Also, remember that confidence lags behind. Just like the alpha high-schooler who dropped out of college and became a bum had alpha confidence long after he became a loser, the person building confidence through hard work will have confidence that lags behind the work they've put in. The alpha confidence equation is different for everyone. Don't mistake alphaism with assholism. By the late college years, most women have figured out how to sort the two very well.
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#25
10-09-2007, 01:11 AM
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Re: How to become the Alpha Male???
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] I think using less question marks would help too. [/ QUOTE ] I think posting less useless posts would help as well, because I'm going to do what I want to do, right??????? For those that are married and have achieved alpha status, and have nothing productive to say, please don't post. But those with some good advice, I would love to hear your input.... [/ QUOTE ] I think it's good advice. An alpha male should only require one question mark. And I'm kind of torn on this response, because being assertive is a good thing falling under category three of masculinity (aggressiveness), but at the same time it risks coming off as sensitive which conflicts with category 1 of masculinity (lack of femininity).
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#26
10-09-2007, 01:41 AM
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Re: How to become the Alpha Male???
[ QUOTE ]
Huh? You can try going here for advice: http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/po...p;Board=Laughs [/ QUOTE ] LDO imo!
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#27
10-09-2007, 06:18 AM
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Re: How to become the Alpha Male???
If you have to ask, you probably won't be the alpha male easily. Those individuals tend to not conceive of the possibility that they may not be the top dog!
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#28
10-09-2007, 01:21 PM
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Re: How to become the Alpha Male???
[ QUOTE ]
If you have to ask, you probably won't be the alpha male easily. Those individuals tend to not conceive of the possibility that they may not be the top dog! [/ QUOTE ] That arrogance usually leads to a fall. On the other hand, I've known alpha males who are very aware of the precariousness of their position. These men have stayed on top thusfar because they haven't become complacent. They do, however, believe in themselves to a great extent but they are aware that their position is a product of something other than genetics or birthright.
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#29
10-09-2007, 03:21 PM
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Re: How to become the Alpha Male???
There are allot of contradictions running through this thread. Or maybe not contradictions, but misunderstanding of alpha status.
Alpha male (or female, but due to our history we are more used to the term Alpha Male, so I'll stick to that from now on, but it is not gender specigic to be Alpha) is a role WITHIN A SPECIFIC GROUP. So one doesn'e become the Alpha male of life. The heads of many households (the home Alphas) are not necesarily the holders of alpha status at work and vise versa. So you can become the Alpha in your family, amongst your social group, at work, or any combination of 2 or more. They are neither mutually exclusive or inclusive. Also, someone who was the alpha in every group they spend time in is not a shoe in to become the alpha in his next job where he knows no-one. Obvioulsy he has more chance than someone who has never achieved the role. Allot of it is about being self dependant, in every way. Think about it. The exsistence of thye alpha male role comes about from other people's needs. People who need assurances seek them from people who are more confident, and in so doing bestow upon that person some kudos that elevates that person a few points higher in relation to the person seeking assurance. The same applys to intellectualism, if someone seeks help with a thinking problem, more points are moved between the two. The way points are available in this kudos league are limitless. Like a poker game, it is about playing your opponents, not your cards. You may be a 6foot 5 bronze adonis, but that's not to say that particular bonus would serve you in good stead trying to become the alpha male if you happen to be stranded on an island umong a group of other men all 4ft 7 with bucked teeth on their way home from a fat fighter's convention. They would posibly resent your looks and you may be better off scruffing yourself up to become accepted. As has allready been mentioned, there is a very subtle difference between being a confident man and an a$$hole. A good way to put all this together is to give you a short synopsis of snapshots of my life, re my status. School - I was the scruffy kid with egg stain on his shirt. I was far from alpha, I was however comedic and some alphas liked to hang with me. ~20 yrs old - I spent several years doing really broad ranges of things, experianced life, and became confident in my ability to handle most things that were thrown at me. I took on the role of Alpha male in me immediate family, including my parents, and in some jobs I held but not others. I was never Alpha in my social groups. Now (29) - I am the alpha in almost every circle I move in, includine my own family (wife/kids) and my extended family (Mother, brothers, in-laws etc), all my social groups, and most but not all work situations. Apart from at work, this role is never something I strive for, it just landed in my lap. One other thing, I have NEVER, and I mean NEVER been able to approach women, and if no-one ever invented alchohol I would probably be single.
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#30
10-09-2007, 03:50 PM
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Re: How to become the Alpha Male???
Ironlaw Alpha status is not static. It can change. It is possible to perceive that someone is trying to be dominant and to reject that domination. I've actually seen this happen in a group. If you think about it you probably have too. Confidence is powerful in influencing group acceptance but that acceptance as Alpha at one time doesn't guarantee it will continue indefinitely. In nature we see this all the time. Lions being a prime example, where the young males vie for head of the pride against the older lions. People are an even harder group to dominate consistently.
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