EDF Wedding Planner Guide

[Elevens]

Here's some general tips/advice:

1. Offer free advertising to some of the vendors. I'm not talking about anything crazy, like having corporate logos sewn onto the wedding gown or anything. However, if you build a website (there are free ones out there, too), you can offer free advertising on the website. You can also come up with a sponsor sheet to have at all the tables at the reception with free advertising space on that as well. Sounds hokey, but it will definitely give you some haggling room.

2. Give out creative, non-expensive bridal party gifts. Every groomsmen in my wedding party was either current or prior military. I ended up giving out flags that had flown above the White House on the 1st anniversary of 9/11 for about 8 bucks each. They appreciated that more than a $50 engraved flask that they'll probably never use.

3. Also consider a Friday wedding. They're comparable in price (if not cheaper) to a Sunday.

4. See if you can bring in any food yourself to the reception. You can save money on deserts/appetizers this way.

5. Plan out as far in advance as you can and try to lock in a price now. Prices don't get cheaper as time goes by.

6. No matter how well you plan, something will go wrong the day of your wedding. Most likely the only two people who will notice is you and your wife. No one else will have a clue, so don't worry about it. They all make for good stories later on, anyway.

7. Check with a local high school for recommendations on cheap DJs. Yeah, this is a gamble, but high schools aren't known to spend money. Just make sure you check them out beforehand and make sure you know what songs they will be playing. No matter who you go with, you're in charge. Tell them what songs to play and more importantly what songs NOT to play. Some DJs still think it's cool to play the "Macarena".

8. You don't need the extras. No one is going to care or notice the white covers on the chairs at the reception. No one will notice if you don't have an ice sculpture, either.

9. I personally think paying to have a video made is a waste. I've watched my wedding video once.

10. Register for things that make sense. Most people don't actually need an expresso machine or a quesadilla maker. And, if you think you do, you don't. It'll sit in a cabinet somewhere never used. So, don't make it a wish list. You'll end up getting things you don't really need or want. Also, register for things in a range of prices. Don't make everything $100+ dollars. Your parents are the only ones who will buy you that.

10a. Also, register somewhere that makes sense. If you have a lot of out of town people coming, do they have that store in their area of the country? Does this place offer online, as well as in store purchases? This is your wedding, too. You'll never use fine china, but I guarantee that you'll need a cordless drill.

11. Make your own invitations. However, good luck convincing your fiancee to do that.

12. Have a friend(s) take pictures of your wedding, especially if one is an amateur photographer with a nice digital SLR camera.

13. If you really want the disposable cameras at the tables, go with an off brand one. Avoid the actual pretty wedding style ones. You're paying for packaging, the functions and quality are the same.

14. I think the dollar dance is an odd form of begging, but it's effective for raking in some cash. Expect to dance with some your "funny" guy friends, though.

15. Politely ask for kids to stay at home in your invites. The parents (generally) don't have as much fun with them there.

16. Borrow a friend's really nice car instead of getting a limo. Especially if you know someone who has a classic car. Of course, they can drive you around, too.

17. Have some food/snacks waiting for you at your hotel room. Most likely, you'll either be too busy or nervous to eat at the reception. Sex will come much later than you expect, because you'll have to spend 20 minutes getting undressed and pulling all the hair pins out of your wife's hair. Might as well eat. Let's hope your wife isn't too tired/drunk to have sexy time, too. Although, this will soon become the norm, anyway...

18. Skip the hotel and go back home that night.

19. Make an attempt to go around to each of your guest's tables as a couple and thank them for coming/being there for you. Also, send out thank you cards as soon as possible. It's common courtesy, and the longer you wait, the more chance you'll never do it.

And, the best way to save money:

20. Elope.

[lippy]

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15. Politely ask for kids to stay at home in your invites. The parents (generally) don't have as much fun with them there.

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I hate this. I wasn't invited to my only cousin's wedding because they wanted a childless wedding/reception, which also prevented my Dad from going (couldn't travel and leave kids at home). I'm still somewhat bitter about it, at the time my cousin was like God to me.

[Ken_AA]

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15. Politely ask for kids to stay at home in your invites. The parents (generally) don't have as much fun with them there.

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I hate this. I wasn't invited to my only cousin's wedding because they wanted a childless wedding/reception, which also prevented my Dad from going (couldn't travel and leave kids at home). I'm still somewhat bitter about it, at the time my cousin was like God to me.

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To bad. everyone else had more fun without kids falling all over the dance floor. We did this and it pissed some of our family off, and I'm certainly glad we did.

Another great thing we did is register at Bed bath and beyond. After your wedding you can return anything on your registry for cash, no questions asked. We returned almost everytihng we got because we decided we wanted new living room furniture instead of a number of small things.

Ken

[Greenbird]

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How did everyone go about finding venues? When you looked at a possible venue, what are the types of things I need to ask about?

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It's probably helpful to first decide on a type of venue- whether you want to have your reception in a traditional ballroom-type setting (hotels are easy places to look for these), outdoors (in a garden? public park?), or something funky (everything from museums to redecorated barns to converted train stations are becoming more and more popular these days). Also, you'll want to consider what you're doing about your ceremony- do you want your reception venue to be able to double as your ceremony venue? (in that case you'd want a reception venue that either has two separate spaces, or can change over the space easily/quickly) Or are you having the ceremony somewhere else (like at church) and thus probably want to have the reception somewhere close by?
Things to ask your venue: what they take care of (some venues are all-inclusive, meaning they provide the food, the cake, the flowers, the tables, the chairs, the linens, etc.- most provide some combination of the above); what kind of restrictions they have for vendors/services that they don't provide (do they only work with certain approved caterers? do they have restrictions on what kind of decorations you can put up?); cost, including food/drink minimums if relevant; and what kind of staff time/assistance is included in the venue rental (do they hand you a key and leave? will they set up the tables and chairs for you? do they have a coordinator that will work with you throughout the night, even doing things like telling you when to cut the cake?); and how many hours are included in the rental fee (both for the actual party, and also when any outside vendors can get in to set up).
A lot of venues are pretty good about letting you stop by either before, or sometimes even during, events that they're hosting that are similar to yours so that you can get an idea of what a place is like when it's all set up and ready to go.
Good luck with the planning!

[SossMan]

this should probably be in BBV, but after 6 months of planning a california wedding (wine country) we said f&ck it and we will be here in 2 weeks from today to get married:







wedding + wedding coordinator + honeymoon = under 15k

i may never come back.

[4 High]

We got married on a Friday, which i guess is different. Her parents thankfully paid for the whole thing, so i can't really comment on money saving things. I will say that if they had not paid, there is no way we would have had a big wedding and likely would have had a destination wedding.