Rachel Ray has my wife under a spell

[youtalkfunny]

Rachel Ray is evil. That's all I can figure.

My wife watches "30 Minute Meals" every day, even though she can't prepare any meal that doesn't end in "___-Helper" (Hamburger Helper, Tuna Helper, etc).

She buys every magazine that has Rachel Ray on the cover.

Now there's a talk show, as well. I'm sitting on the computer, and she's watching YouKnowWho on the tv. Suddenly, the tv goes mute. I turn around to see if wifey is still in the room. She is. I'm confused.

I look at the tv, where there's a close-up of a syringe going into an old lady's nose.

"AAAARRRRRGGGHHHH! WTF are you watching???"

"Rachel Ray. That's why I muted it, I knew you didn't want to see/hear what they were doing."

"And you still watch it??? She's got you under her spell, I swear to Christ!"

Wifey really gets upset when I crack jokes about the size of Rachel Ray's mouth. "What are you watching, The Muppets?", or, "Looks like 'Jaws' coming at us!"

[RoundGuy]

She eats way too much of the food she makes. Serving for four, no problem, I'll eat it....

[Autocratic]

Start talking about how much you want to bang her. Your wife will find a new show in no time.

[SNOWBALL]

[ QUOTE ]
Start talking about how much you want to bang her. Your wife will gain 30 lbs and start dressing like a gypsy in no time.

[/ QUOTE ]

[AquaSwing]

She better be a demon in the sack because I don't see much else that's good about her. I'm talking about Rachel Ray, not your wife.

[Oliver Nipples]

Rachel Ray is evil, especially during her college years.

[felson]

rachel ray's grating voice makes me want to scream.

[RoundGuy]

[ QUOTE ]
She better be a demon in the sack because I don't see much else that's good about her. I'm talking about Rachel Ray, not your wife.

[/ QUOTE ]
I can vouch for the fact that OP's wife is indeed a demon in the sack.

[pokergrader]

I can vouch for the fact that Rachel Ray is in fact a demon in the sack.

[NT!]

my lady friend watches this crap too. i tried auto's suggestion and mentioned how much i would like to hate-[censored] that stupid loud bitch. Ms. NT's response: 'yeah i could see that.'