social anxiety

[oddjob]

i just realized recently that as i get older, my social anxiety is getting worse and worse. i've always had it, but have been able to deawl with it well in the past, and be as normal as possible, but as i get older, i want to go out less and less.

this includes, and strangely enough, is sometimes worse with friends. like i'll have no problem being alone and out and about, or going to a bar, but meeting a group of friends is less and less appealling to me.

does anyone else have this kind of experience? anyone else dealign with this?

how screwed am i?

p.s. i'm poor and therapy is probably not an option.

[wslee00]

wait - do you just not want to hang out with friends or are you actually more nervous hanging out with them?

[oddjob]

[ QUOTE ]
wait - do you just not want to hang out with friends or are you actually more nervous hanging out with them?

[/ QUOTE ]

i want to hang out with them, but i'm anxious about hanging out with them in any numbers greater then like 2-3, and for any lengths greater then an hour or two.

sometimes if there's a party or bbq, i'll be excited to see people, then when i get home, i just want to go home and hideaway.

also sometimes there'll be somethign going on with a big group, and i'll think of every excuse mentally, not to go.

i've also been dealing with some depression, so i'm sure that plays into it.

[man]

take a class in something you enjoy. go travelling. just find unpressured environments where you can meet people. and make sure you're hammered whenever you leave the house.

[themandude]

I feel the same way odd, I have this problem too. Not exactly the same, but maybe we are just ment to be lone wolfs.

[Klompy]

I can sorta relate, but I can't tell you if it gets any better or not. I usualy don't have a problem unless the event I'm going to is formal enough to where It will be awkward if I leave, and then knowing this alone is what actualy makes it bad in the first place [img]/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img]. I don't avoid going out with friends, but I def avoid going to church, and formal dinners.

[Homer]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
wait - do you just not want to hang out with friends or are you actually more nervous hanging out with them?

[/ QUOTE ]

i want to hang out with them, but i'm anxious about hanging out with them in any numbers greater then like 2-3, and for any lengths greater then an hour or two.

sometimes if there's a party or bbq, i'll be excited to see people, then when i get home, i just want to go home and hideaway.

also sometimes there'll be somethign going on with a big group, and i'll think of every excuse mentally, not to go.

i've also been dealing with some depression, so i'm sure that plays into it.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is how I feel a lot of the time. At first I'm pumped to go out, then I start wondering why I agreed to it but realize I'm stuck and go anyway. Within an hour of seeing people I'm mentally drained and want to go home. It's not that I don't want to see people. It just feels very overwhelming. I/we should probably see a doctor and get some happy pills.

[oddjob]

[ QUOTE ]
take a class in something you enjoy. go travelling. just find unpressured environments where you can meet people. and make sure you're hammered whenever you leave the house.

[/ QUOTE ]

i stopped getting hammered. doesn't mix well with my depression. i used to get super baked, but that makes me just socially retarded, and sometimes even more anxious. not to mention super tired.

[esad]

There's nothing wrong with it. I feel the same way in many situations. I'd rather spend time with one friend for a couple of hours then with 6 friends in a loud room.

There is a theory that some people are more sensitive to outside stimuli then others. It causes them to naturally avoid prolonged periods of lots of stimulus. Do you have a tendency to kinda zone out when there are more people around and there is more stimuli for the brain to process? If so, then it could just be that you need more quiet time. There is nothing wrong with it.

[oddjob]

[ QUOTE ]
I can sorta relate, but I can't tell you if it gets any better or not. I usualy don't have a problem unless the event I'm going to is formal enough to where It will be awkward if I leave, and then knowing this alone is what actualy makes it bad in the first place [img]/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img]. I don't avoid going out with friends, but I def avoid going to church, and formal dinners.

[/ QUOTE ]

i also avoid going to church, but not because of social anxiety.