Please translate what these spanish sayings mean....

[PokerPaul]

A friend has set me up to go on a date, while at the same time a female latina friend is trying to help me by teaching me some nice spanish things to say to her. I tried those free online translators but they dont recognize these sentences. I think she is playing a joke on me but here they are, along with what she told me they meant:

Las tetas tam bonitas (You have a pretty dress)

quero meter la lingua en tu papaya (you have nice lips)

Reparte la cuchera....chuppa melos huevos (Spend some time with me....lets have some eggs for breakfast)

meteme el dedo, en el kulo. (Mind if i touch your behind)

[Henry17]

My Spanish is rusty but yes she is playing a joke on you.

The first one is your breast are beautiful. The second one is asking if you can stick your tongue in ...

[jesusarenque]

She is playing a joke on you.

[Enrique]

[ QUOTE ]
Las tetas tam bonitas (You have a pretty dress)

[/ QUOTE ]

"Your breasts are so beautiful" (tetas is actually the word for breasts that comes to mind in English, the one that starts with a t)

[ QUOTE ]

quero meter la lingua en tu papaya (you have nice lips)

[/ QUOTE ]

"I want to put my tongue in your vagina" (papaya is actually a fruit, it is slang for vagina, but not everywhere, depending on the place it is more or less vulgar).

[ QUOTE ]
Reparte la cuchera....chuppa melos huevos (Spend some time with me....lets have some eggs for breakfast)

[/ QUOTE ]

"Share your thing...suck my balls" (the first sentence I am guessing, cuchera is not a word in mexican slang).

[ QUOTE ]

meteme el dedo, en el kulo. (Mind if i touch your behind)

[/ QUOTE ]

"put your finger in my a__"


In case you wanted to know the extent of your friend's joke. The sentences are quite vulgar, more so than the translations to English look like.

[TheWorstPlayer]

Can't believe anyone went for this OP.

[MicroBob]

paul - curious if your friend was really trying to get you to say those things or if you are just messing with the population here.
Pretty sure this would get my face slapped hard if I said any of these to my GF.

In other news, a few yrs ago I screwed up the pronounciation when trying to wish my GF's parents a Happy New Year and accidentally wished them a Happy New Anus instead.

[DontTapTheGlass]

This was hilarious...whether or not it was intended to be funny or if he was serious, but I needed a good laugh.