Disadvantages of dating a doctor or med student...

[Matt Flynn]

she is not going to change.

it's your choice whether putting up with it is worth it. there's no need to.

[kafkaFan1]

[ QUOTE ]
FWIW, it seems like you became a cop because you have a special desire to help people in need (as many do), rather than because you enjoy power and control. It's possible that you are attracted to high maintence / needy girls for this reason.

I've observed this kind of dynamic in a lot of guys, and the problem is that the pit of need is often bottomless, which means even your most herculean efforts will be perceived as coming up short (so you get the worst of both worlds -- emotionally drained for a thankless cause).

[/ QUOTE ]

poetry. vn

[burningyen]

[ QUOTE ]
FWIW, it seems like you became a cop because you have a special desire to help people in need (as many do), rather than because you enjoy power and control. It's possible that you are attracted to high maintence / needy girls for this reason.

I've observed this kind of dynamic in a lot of guys, and the problem is that the pit of need is often bottomless, which means even your most herculean efforts will be perceived as coming up short (so you get the worst of both worlds -- emotionally drained for a thankless cause).

[/ QUOTE ]
Well said, and funny that you have that avatar. I call this a "savior complex" and have suffered from it myself from time to time.

[mmbt0ne]

IFX,

Seriously. You gotta trust me on this. Leave now and stop thinking about it.

[ItalianFX]

[ QUOTE ]
IFX,

Seriously. You gotta trust me on this. Leave now and stop thinking about it.

[/ QUOTE ]

We aren't together anymore. My problem now is trying to forget about it and get on with my life.

[MicroBob]

break-ups and heart-break suck and definitely are problems.
Work on yourself as best you can...time healds all wounds....blah blah blah.
It doesn't sound like much help now of course. But things do get better. They just take time. Also, a good rebound or three might be a fun idea too.

You are definitely better off without this girl and need to remind yourself of that when you are feeling down about it. She is not capable of handling a relationship right now and the two of you have already established some really unhealthy patterns where she would be unlikely to change all this lousy stuff if she stayed with you.

So learn from the mistakes of this and you now know a bit better what you want and that you deserve to be treated better and proceed with your life from there.

[PITTM]

[ QUOTE ]
Simple question: Does she love you as much as you love her?

[/ QUOTE ]

Shes a woman. So I guess the modified question for her would be "well what is he doing for me right now?". If you have done something ridiculously over the top nice recently she will say yes, if not no. Its like having a dog, give them food and theyre happy.

[mmbt0ne]

IFX,

How long ago was it? Because you're basically word-for-word me in late August.

[keikiwai]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
IFX,

Seriously. You gotta trust me on this. Leave now and stop thinking about it.

[/ QUOTE ]

We aren't together anymore. My problem now is trying to forget about it and get on with my life.

[/ QUOTE ]

just bury yourself in friends, work, hobbies, etc.... pretty soon you'll forget about her, and pretty soon you'll bump into someone new

it def takes time, but time does heal

[ItalianFX]

[ QUOTE ]
IFX,

How long ago was it? Because you're basically word-for-word me in late August.

[/ QUOTE ]

She called me and things were fine and then somehow the conversation turned to our relationship and we officially broke up around 3pm on Friday, 11/2.