jokes you've made IRL that flopped

[otnemem]

[ QUOTE ]
I've had many. The one I regret the most is:

Back in 911 days, Chandra Levy was missing and there was speculation that Gary Condit had something to do with it.

Well, my joke was along the lines that, "Gary Condit issued a press release about the whearabouts of Chandra Levy. Good news: She contacted him this morning; Bad news, she was calling from the World Trade Center."

[/ QUOTE ]
Who are you, Dennis Miller?

[AbreuTime]

While my older sister (sophomore in high school at the time) was getting ready to go the Senior Prom with some dude she knew from the track team, my parents took some pictures before he arrived. For some reason, I jokingly blurted out "Don't do anything you'll regret in 9 months." Man, the ensuing silence was awkward.

[MikeyPatriot]

I think the "OR ARE YOU???" jokes ends up transcending itself from a bombed joke to an awesome story.

I've definitely told some jokes that bombed, but I can't remember them. Best thing to do is to immediately make fun of yourself to save face.

[garcia1000]

You know the Aces joke?
[ QUOTE ]
A Sunday school teacher said to her children, "We have been learning how powerful kings and queens were in Biblical times. But, there is a higher power. Can anybody tell me what it is?"

One child blurted out, "Aces!"

[/ QUOTE ]

When my home game was just filling up at the start of the night, I told this joke and got some groans.

Then, every time a new person arrived, I would tell the joke again! There was also this person who, every time I told the joke to a new person, would be all "LOL can you tell it again?!"

Apparently jokes that are groaners the first time become really bad the tenth time [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

[mmbt0ne]

I know I've bombed some jokes in my day, but luckily I and pretty much everyone around forgets them once I get one right. I'm sure I'll bomb at least one or two this weekend, so will update.

Also, I think classrooms are a bad place to judge whether or not a joke bombs. For instance, one of the best jokes I've ever heard would probably be considered a "bomb" based on response. A professor had missed the last class for unknown reasons and it turned out she had gone to the doctor and found out she was pregnant. The next class she put a picture of the ultrasound on the projector and my friend blurted out "That baby looks nothing like me." HI-larious, but very little laughter.

[Autocratic]

For a lifelong class clown like myself, I am not sure I can even grasp how many of my jokes have bombed.

I do stand up, and some of it is intentionally very corny and I like to tell it at drunken parties. Usually the following joke gets a few laughs, but in a class of mine the other day where upon hearing I am a jokester it was requested I make a joke, it got nothing:

"When I was a kid I went out to Missouri, visiting my great grandparents. When I was there I saw a caterpillar museum, which seemed really crazy to me. I actually liked it a lot though, and I tried to go back a few years later, but it had turned into a butterfly museum."

Class of about 20 mostly just looked away, and one said "you seriously do stand up?"

[DeezNuts]

In a fantasy draft a long time ago(when I was 14), I made a joke about Tim Crews, a Dodger pitcher who had died in a boat crash in the previous year, winning "Comeback Player of the Year".

Everyone in the room was a huge Dodger fan and just looked at me with disgust, a couple guys told me just how unfunny I was.

My buddy laughed pretty hard in the corner, though. Score!

[TiK]

[ QUOTE ]
The next class she put a picture of the ultrasound on the projector and my friend blurted out "That baby looks nothing like me." HI-larious, but very little laughter.

[/ QUOTE ]

That's pretty [censored] funny. I would've loled. Actually, I probably would'v been the one who said something along those lines.

[Xaston]

This comes to you from my roommate:

The other day in his class the professor was discussing a student she had, who was shot in the heart.

My friend made a Bon Jovi lyric joke and it didn't go over well. I thought it was funny when he told me about it.

[scpi10]

[ QUOTE ]
I know I've bombed some jokes in my day, but luckily I and pretty much everyone around forgets them once I get one right. I'm sure I'll bomb at least one or two this weekend, so will update.

Also, I think classrooms are a bad place to judge whether or not a joke bombs. For instance, one of the best jokes I've ever heard would probably be considered a "bomb" based on response. A professor had missed the last class for unknown reasons and it turned out she had gone to the doctor and found out she was pregnant. The next class she put a picture of the ultrasound on the projector and my friend blurted out "That baby looks nothing like me." HI-larious, but very little laughter.

[/ QUOTE ]

this joke was A+