Disadvantages of dating a doctor or med student... - Page 2

ItalianFX · #1 11-05-2007, 12:07 AM

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I'm a doctor who married another doctor. We both agree that it is a huge advantage having a spouse who understands the stresses of our jobs without question. It makes our lives much easier not to have to explain why we need to cancel plans, are just too tired to go out, need to vent, or don't feel like talking some days when we get home. That doesn't mean that it can't work, but you are going to need to be very flexible/understanding.

If she is serious about being a neurosurgeon then medical school will be the good times. Once residency starts, you won't be seeing nearly as much of her. She will be working long hours, including nights and weekends. Her free time will mostly be spent sleeping.

This isn't meant to be all doom and gloom. If your relationship is strong, then you will work it out. It's not such a unique situation. Plenty of successful relationships have made it through tough times where work has to take priority.

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I'm like the most flexible/understanding guy on the planet. I told her I'd be there to support her no matter what the cost and I'd be willing to go wherever she gets a residency. I was prepared to do what I needed to do.

I really don't mind not going out. I actually favor not going out to going out as I am money conscious. I like to just hang out and spend time together rather than being in a large group and banging into each other.

Well, we aren't together. She just called me a little bit ago and I was telling her about my 35 hour day and she basically got the attitude that she didn't have time to talk to me anymore.

7ontheline · #2 11-05-2007, 12:12 AM

Doctors are busy, but in this case it really seems like a secondary issue. She just doesn't seem to want to be with you. I wouldn't want to be with someone who handled stress as poorly as she seems to anyway. Medical school is not THAT hard. It's busy, and difficult, but give me a break. It just gets worse in residency, especially if she wants to be a neurosurgeon. If she's already not putting effort into keeping a relationship together, it's not going to magically be better later.

wadea · #3 11-05-2007, 03:20 PM

You sound like you have some serious self-respect or self-worth problems. Even though it feels like you want this chick - if you could view things more objectively, you'd realize that you don't want anything to do with her. Even staying friends will just bring more pain. End it for good.

PITTM · #4 11-05-2007, 07:33 PM

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Simple question: Does she love you as much as you love her?

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Shes a woman. So I guess the modified question for her would be "well what is he doing for me right now?". If you have done something ridiculously over the top nice recently she will say yes, if not no. Its like having a dog, give them food and theyre happy.

mmbt0ne · #5 11-05-2007, 07:55 PM

IFX,

How long ago was it? Because you're basically word-for-word me in late August.

ItalianFX · #6 11-05-2007, 09:02 PM

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IFX,

How long ago was it? Because you're basically word-for-word me in late August.

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She called me and things were fine and then somehow the conversation turned to our relationship and we officially broke up around 3pm on Friday, 11/2.

gumpzilla · #7 11-05-2007, 09:45 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Simple question: Does she love you as much as you love her?

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Shes a woman. So I guess the modified question for her would be "well what is he doing for me right now?". If you have done something ridiculously over the top nice recently she will say yes, if not no. Its like having a dog, give them food and theyre happy.

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Have you considered finding a woman who doesn't suck?

ItalianFX · #8 11-05-2007, 10:12 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Simple question: Does she love you as much as you love her?

[/ QUOTE ]

Shes a woman. So I guess the modified question for her would be "well what is he doing for me right now?". If you have done something ridiculously over the top nice recently she will say yes, if not no. Its like having a dog, give them food and theyre happy.

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Have you considered finding a woman who doesn't suck?

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I really loved her. Now, finding a different girl is easier said than done.

garcia1000 · #9 11-05-2007, 10:23 PM

Hey ItalianFX,

One other thing that strikes me is that you have a dearth of "game". It would be great to remedy this before you search again for companionship, to save you yet more heartbreak.

Tien · #10 11-05-2007, 10:15 PM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Simple question: Does she love you as much as you love her?

[/ QUOTE ]

Shes a woman. So I guess the modified question for her would be "well what is he doing for me right now?". If you have done something ridiculously over the top nice recently she will say yes, if not no. Its like having a dog, give them food and theyre happy.

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Have you considered finding a woman who doesn't suck?

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Hey man, you can't say [censored] like that in a serious thread when you haven't been in his shoes. The fact that he says she's a great person a % of the time would also screw with anyone's emotions.

Emotions play a big roll here but Italian basically did what most of the people here agreed to.