Stupid things you believed as a child

[Khaos4k]

We all had some pretty stupid things that we thought for sure were true when we were kids. Some common, some that only we thought. Yes, this is shamelessly stolen from a similar idea at somethingawful,but I'm sure some better ones will come out of here. Bonus points for ms paint.

- I thought my face would get stuck that way if I made funny faces

- I thought if I ever did anything bad in school, that it would go on my permanent record and I would never be able to go to college or get a decent job. I was a stupidly good kid.

- You know those buttons for the walk/don't walk signs? I thought there was a small man in them that worked a series of levers to change the lights. I would get pissed off at him when they didn't change fast enough.

[guids]

- I thought if I ever did anything bad in school, that it would go on my permanent record and I would never be able to go to college or get a decent job. I was a stupidly good kid.


I unfortunately realized at a very young age, that this isnt true. Screwed me pretty hard imo.

[dnh83]

I used to think having sex was just kissing on the lips. I knew that if you were a virgin it meant you hadn't had sex, but I didn't know what sex was. There was an episode of Fresh Prince was Carlton's girlfriend was pregnant, supposedly with his kid. At the beginning of the scene Carlton kisses his girlfriend, then later in the scene he admits he's a virgin. I was like, wtf? No you're not, you just had sex with her!

[Holybull]

That black people's poop was black and white people's poop was white.

[Paul B.]

I thought brothers and sisters were supposed to get married. I was very sad, as I am an only child.

[btmagnetw]

-god
-santa

[RoundGuy]

True story. One of my teachers asked the class what you would end up hitting if you could dig a hole as as deep as possible. I, of course, answered: CHINA.

This was in 4th grade, and I was 10 years old. I never thought I'd live through the embarrassment.

[Perplexity]

i thought janis joplin was black until i was like 19

[I Love Mr Slope]

I thought sex was the man urinating up the woman's butthole. Til I was 17.

[KilgoreTrout]

I used to speculate that I was the sole survivor of the human race and that everyone else was a robot. It made it easier to slack on my paper route.