Should Vice Principal Lose Her Job? - (*Warning-Gruesome topic")

[DeuceKicker]

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Each case has the same culpability, same neglect, same result. In all cases we feel sorry for the suffering of the child and the agony the parents must feel. They all deserve to be punished.

[/ QUOTE ]Case in point. While admittedly highly subjective, I find it hard to believe that people don't try to think beyond,"Mongo see kid die. Mongo think all parent equally culpable. Mongo kill all."

This seems to have been missed a gazillion times here. CHOOSING to leave your kids in the car for an extended period of time is not the same as forgetting.

Now one might conclude that the Forgettor's culpability is high enough to warrant punishment, but calling it "equal" to someone who chooses to leave their kid in the car, or someone who kills a guard in the process of committing armed robbery (WTF?) almost seems so illogical as to be intentional.

[blackize]

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Besides, I just don't see what purpose sending the parent to jail serves. Despite how things are being worded in this forum, she did not choose to leave her baby in the car.

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She backed her car up. She should have seen the child, and I think she did.

Sending her to jail at the very least keeps her from neglecting her other child and possibly endangering the children at her work.

[Blarg]

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People with strong feelings can be logical; they just aren't trying very hard in this thread. I don't want to get in a flame war, however, especially when I'm ambivalent about the woman in question.


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Please, stop trying to mask ad hominem remarks with the patronizing "voice of reason" schtick. If you don't want to stir up the pot, don't poop into it.

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The phrase "killing your child" is an example of the emotionally-charged language that strikes me as extreme. You're not supposed to put your newborn in a crib with loose bedding, yet a number of babies die every year from getting twisted up in loose bedding and being strangled. Did those parents "kill" their child? What about the parent who lets their baby sleep with them and rolls over in the middle of the night and smothers them. (I think this happens much less often, but can still happen.)

Is there anything that can happen to a toddler that we'll call an accident?


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These things are in no way analogous to what this woman did.

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Again, the previous warnings cloud the issue to me.


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There's not a loud of cloudiness in the issue, but I would hope that at least that would have a clarifying effect.

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Still, I remember a news story from years ago when I was living in Michigan. A man left his baby in the car all day and it died. It normally wasn't his job to take the baby to daycare, but his wife couldn't for some reason and he completely forgot.

The reaction from the community was pretty heavily weighted toward support and empathy.

Besides, I just don't see what purpose sending the parent to jail serves. Despite how things are being worded in this forum, she did not choose to leave her baby in the car.


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You know no more about her intention than anyone else. For my part, I'd say it stretches credulity quite a lot to impute your standard good intentions to this woman. I think it's just that what is very likely the truth is unbearable compared to trying to construct a kinder, even though ridiculous, story.

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As an aside, I'm not sure what I expected, but it seems that posters with children are generally being more sympathetic, while those without are finding it easiest to level blanket condemnations.

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Certain things are very scary to think about, but can only be more so when you are closer to the situation. I'm sure criminals are a lot more afraid of going to jail than law-abiding citizens are, and swimmers are more worried about running into sharks. That's hardly a vote for reason.

And finally, saying that people who disagree with you, repeatedly, are doing so without distinction or perhaps even the ability to make distinctions, as you appear to be doing, is poor form and disingenuous. It's possible for people to disagree with you without being your inferiors, and in this case, you do them a disservice by disavowing that they have done so. If anyone is making blanket condemnations in this thread, it is you.

[Blarg]

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Each case has the same culpability, same neglect, same result. In all cases we feel sorry for the suffering of the child and the agony the parents must feel. They all deserve to be punished.

[/ QUOTE ]Case in point. While admittedly highly subjective, I find it hard to believe that people don't try to think beyond,"Mongo see kid die. Mongo think all parent equally culpable. Mongo kill all."

This seems to have been missed a gazillion times here. CHOOSING to leave your kids in the car for an extended period of time is not the same as forgetting.

Now one might conclude that the Forgettor's culpability is high enough to warrant punishment, but calling it "equal" to someone who chooses to leave their kid in the car, or someone who kills a guard in the process of committing armed robbery (WTF?) almost seems so illogical as to be intentional.

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"The Forgettor?" Is that some new superhero?

You have no more knowledge than anyone else whether the lady forgot anything.

Given that lack of knowledge, you can suppose such a thing is either more or less likely to happen. In matters of life and death, of one's own child furthermore -- and in the face of earlier being warned about such a matter, the type which no rational adult would need a reminder of -- how likely is it that forgetfulness was involved?

How many times does she get to "forget"? Should we pick a number? Is the "forgetting" okay if there is no harm done, or only if there is harm done?

This "forgetfulness" is quite a racket.

[katyseagull]

Blarg, not to beat this horse to death but could you please explain what you think her motivation was. You have said that it was not accidental and that it's your belief Brenda Slaby is sociopathic and knowingly left her daughter in her car when she went into work.

So what do you think was on her mind then, that she would go back out to the car and check on the kid? That she would leave her there all day and deal with her death later? According to witness accounts, she was truly shocked to learn she had left her kid in the car.

[Blarg]

I don't think something like this can be an accident, but I can't say I know why she would do this on purpose. If we accept what seems obvious to me, the incredible level of narcissism necessary to not just once but repeatedly endanger your child like this, it would be enough merely that she felt the child was an impingement on her freedom and self-indulgence, which of course any child is to a parent, no matter how loved. Whether her act was a matter of depraved indifference or an active intent to kill with plausible deniability built-in -- more than that, a chance to make herself the star of her own sick show -- I don't know.

Her motives might not be entirely conscious. I can see someone with narcissistic motivations not admitting cruel and selfish motives to herself. In fact, that goes with that disorder perfectly. What narcissist wants to think less of themselves by bringing to their full consciousness the depth of their problem?

She might not have known herself until just now. And I mean that in both ways.

[Stagger_Lee]

Meh, killing a kid.

Nothing a bit of "me" time couldn't sort out.

Look at the reaction of the Mccans in the UK.

[katyseagull]

I don't understand. What are you saying about the Mccans? What is this "me" time? (sorry for being dumb). Are you saying they want attention or am I misunderstanding you?

[Chips Ahoy]

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I don't think something like this can be an accident

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Earlier I quoted statistics that showed the rate tripled when SOP changed to car seat in the back and the rate has remained that high since. People forgetting fits that data well -- making the kid less visible makes it easier to forget. If you believe forgetting is impossible, what could cause the jump in frequency? Or do you reject the data?

[Stagger_Lee]

"Me" time is not about wanting attention.
It is a phrase that people use when they want to dump/neglect the kids. It is a phrase I hear a lot from selfish people. They need "me" time at the gym. "Me" time at a nightclub. It means that they find kids a drag - that ticket has been punched - onto the next ego satisfying thing - be it career, drugs, adventure.