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#241
04-14-2007, 12:31 PM
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Re: Pregnant GF
[ QUOTE ]
"I really dont know what to do. I'm obviously not ready to be a father. I was planning selling my house and moving within a year. I was planning on proposing to her this coming Christmas.(we both wanted to have a 2+ yr engagement period before getting married)" So, you love this young woman, you were willing to constantly have sex with her, but you decided you don't have the balls to man up when you get her pregnant, just because it ruins your plans to be free? I understand the feelings behind the post, but it's tough for me to say anything other than be responsible for what you chose to do and what she decides to do. And why is everyone so dead set against a minivan? You can do a ton of things with them that you can't with a pickup, yet you can do some bulk item hauling when need be. Maybe I'm just a geek.... [/ QUOTE ] Prepare to be hated by the masses of immature 16-year-olds that now seem to infest this forum. You're right, but they won't let that get in the way. Only his life is "ruined" obviously. Its entirely her fault and not at all his that he decided to be irresponsible and not wrap it up. (On the record: My brother got married in June. His wife got pregnant 2 months later completely unplanned., on the pill and he says he was wrapping it. It can happen, kids. Pay attention and try not to be stupid. Real life happens real fast sometimes.) 
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#242
04-14-2007, 12:53 PM
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Re: Pregnant GF
My sister and brother in law found themselves in a similar situation. The child that they had ended up being (9 years later) the catalyst for a series of changes that ended up in them going from broke to millionaires. It forced them to take risks, to switch jobs, to buy a house, to mend relationships, to be bold. No kidding--I can see the direct line from that unexpected pregnancy to where they are today. My point? This isn't necessarily the end of your dreams, sometimes things change and the end result is far better than you could have ever expected. But, the key is to not act out of fear or selfishness. Good luck.
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#243
04-14-2007, 01:08 PM
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Re: Pregnant GF
Good post, but if we'd wait for people to be THAT well-planned, the world would be a much less crowded space... for bad and good.
I think you might be more pie-in-the-sky than I am.... :P
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#244
04-14-2007, 01:14 PM
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Re: Pregnant GF
[ QUOTE ]
Its entirely her fault and not at all his that he decided to be irresponsible and not wrap it up. [/ QUOTE ] She was on the pill, AND they add an agreement to abort if a pregnancy happened. This IS entirely her fault. If she hadn't [censored] changed her mind and gone back on their agreement, this wouldn't have ever happened.
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#245
04-14-2007, 01:23 PM
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Re: Pregnant GF
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] Its entirely her fault and not at all his that he decided to be irresponsible and not wrap it up. [/ QUOTE ] She was on the pill, AND they add an agreement to abort if a pregnancy happened. This IS entirely her fault. If she hadn't [censored] changed her mind and gone back on their agreement, this wouldn't have ever happened. [/ QUOTE ] congrats on being a moron. it's easy to say certain things and much harder to mean them in many instances - this is one of them. and while the girl's opposition to adoption is difficult to handle, OP still has responsibility here, in one form or another. however, if OP will resent the child and the life he has to lead because of this (like he seems to now), staying with the child doesn't necessarily seem to be the best option. i mean, if he can't hack it as a father or a husband - that's no good for everyone involved. again, it's easy to say he will be responsible and not resentful, but meaning it for 5, 10, or 20 years is very difficult.
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#246
04-14-2007, 01:27 PM
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Re: Pregnant GF
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] Its entirely her fault and not at all his that he decided to be irresponsible and not wrap it up. [/ QUOTE ] She was on the pill, AND they add an agreement to abort if a pregnancy happened. This IS entirely her fault. If she hadn't [censored] changed her mind and gone back on their agreement, this wouldn't have ever happened. [/ QUOTE ] She's [censored] TWENTY YEARS OLD, dude. She has no idea what she'd actually want. And you still think this absolves him of any and all responsibility? Didn't think you'd care to elaborate on your even more ludicrous idea that he lawyer up and try to find somebody to prove a "verbal contract". Are you seriously this dumb, or are you just trying to play devil's advocate?
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#247
04-14-2007, 01:38 PM
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Re: Pregnant GF
[ QUOTE ]
Didn't think you'd care to elaborate on your even more ludicrous idea that he lawyer up and try to find somebody to prove a "verbal contract". Are you seriously this dumb, or are you just trying to play devil's advocate? [/ QUOTE ] It's definitely ludicrous. I'm just tired of all the automatic calls which happen in this situation, biased towards the woman. It is not unreasonable for him to not use a condom with the pill and an agreement to abort. So he shouldn't be given hell because he "was irresponsible by not wrapping it up". So basically this guy is [censored] over because "she's TWENTY years old" and has no idea what she wants. Great. Double standards are [censored].
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#248
04-14-2007, 01:46 PM
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Re: Pregnant GF
[ QUOTE ]
So basically this guy is [censored] over because "she's TWENTY years old" and has no idea what she wants. Great. Double standards are [censored]. [/ QUOTE ] Mother Nature doesn't care about double standards.
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#250
04-14-2007, 02:23 PM
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Re: Pregnant GF
What the OP needs most:
1 serious advice from people who have a little perspective. 2 serious advice from people who are willing to think. 3 well-meant advice from people who haven't thought about it before. 4 messages of encouragement from his peers. 5 well-meant funny comments. 6 stupid advice. 7 stupid jokes. 8 any contribution from you. edit: I've read some of your other posts. This may be an example of your best work.
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