Friend that's a girl expects me to pay for drinks, awkwardness ensues.

[otnemem]

OK, so as documented in a previous thread, I recently broke up with my fiance, and as such I'm stuck with an apartment that's far beyond my means. I'm paying ~53% of my take-home income on the apartment, and that's without utilities, cable, etc.

Anyway, bottom line is I'm pretty poor for the time being. A girl who was fired from my company about a month ago e-mailed me asking if I wanted to go to happy hour. I work in the financial district in NYC, which is a pretty expensive place to go out. And let me note - I'm not interested in this girl physically whatsoever.

So we meet up for happy hour, get about four rounds and some food. I ask her if we should get the check, she says yeah, but maybe we can stop somewhere on the way home, and she'll buy me a drink. This might not come across that well in type, but she was basically insinuating that she expects me to pick up this bill (which is about $80).

I sit there for about a minute, because I don't know how to react. Do I just eat it and pay the bill? Or do I say something?

Eventually I say, "Oh, are we not splitting this?"

She says, "Oh, yeah, we can..."

And then basically it's really awkward as I try to explain to her, 'if it were last week, I'd pay, but I'm sort of in a weird situation' etc. Isn't this weird that she'd just assume I'm paying for the drinks SHE INVITED ME TO?

If I had any interest in her, this situation would be much different I guess.

[Klompy]

If a girl I'm not interested in asks me out for drinks, at no point would I expect to be paying for her. It's pretty awkward for her to drop that bomb on you. Is she interested in you?

[Jon1000]

why should u have to explain to her at all. this friend blows ass unless ur in the habit of paying for her when you go out. I guess you could've been more smooth, but that's not your fault

[otnemem]

[ QUOTE ]
If a girl I'm not interested in asks me out for drinks, at no point would I expect to be paying for her. It's pretty awkward for her to drop that bomb on you. Is she interested in you?

[/ QUOTE ]
No [censored] idea. It's possible.

[otnemem]

[ QUOTE ]
why should u have to explain to her at all. this friend blows ass unless ur in the habit of paying for her when you go out. I guess you could've been more smooth, but that's not your fault

[/ QUOTE ]
It was way too awkward to be smooth at this point.

[hanimal]

no way should you pay this or think about paying this

[tyler_cracker]

in the grown-up world, i think someone like Dear Abby would say that whoever makes the invitation should pay unless something else is agreed upon beforehand. obviously it's often a little different when girls are involved, but if i were in your situation, i would expect to split the tab or be treated, not to be footing the whole bill.

i think the way you handled it was fine, and that your little explanation helped make it less awkward for both of you -- she probably felt embarassed for assuming that you were paying once she found out you weren't!

[inside??]

Ask her if she will blow you for the difference.

[triviatard2]

No need to be awkard. Just say "sorry I'm kind of poor right now". And yeah she shouldn't have assumed. Fairly standard chick move.

[NT!]

one of two things happened here

1. she likes you
2. she called you because she wanted someone to buy her drinks and thought you might do it