investor/finance fake job ideas please

adi · #1 11-18-2007, 02:18 AM

ok so what would my job title be and what would i be doing exactly? any good links? what's the easiest form of internet marketing? would i need my own site? i found a few links but not very helpful, just some loose definitions... i don't have to know everything, just the basics so i'll know in case anyone ever gets curious. thanks.

emon87 · #2 11-18-2007, 04:41 AM

say you are a webmaster of adult internet sites.

squashington · #3 11-18-2007, 06:18 AM

risk management
equity analyst

Foghatlive · #4 11-18-2007, 10:57 AM

[ QUOTE ]
ok so what would my job title be and what would i be doing exactly? any good links? what's the easiest form of internet marketing? would i need my own site? i found a few links but not very helpful, just some loose definitions... i don't have to know everything, just the basics so i'll know in case anyone ever gets curious. thanks.

[/ QUOTE ]

I've found that when you're in a position where you're compelled to lie, it's best to have the lie be as close as possible to the truth.

So, what you could do is say that you do internet marketing for an online gaming site, like Stars, and that you get a commission for everyone you sign up. It could also be an online brokerage firm like Scottrade.

I've found that people who ask too many nosey questions don't like it when you turn the tables and put the magnifying glass on them. So, if someone is persisting with the questions, start asking them about their work. They'll get the hint.

Henry17 · #5 11-18-2007, 12:16 PM

I don't see why you need to lie.

My suggestion though would be to simply say your a consultant. I'd say at least half the people in my building are consultants and I don't have a clue what most of them do.

Most people don't really want to discuss what you do for a living. They ask to make small talk or to judge you. If you keep it short they will move on.

ahnuld · #6 11-18-2007, 12:23 PM

Henry, I can say from personal experience that it becsomes a huge nuisance to say you're a professional poker player. To some people you have to explain what that means and then deal with "but you gamble, eventually you will lose it all!" speeches. Alot of guys think its cool but then you end up in a 30 minute conversation at the party hearing about this guys 10+1 sit n' go last night when you just want to go over and talk to the hot chick. Then the question of how much you can actually make comes up. Tell the truth and they think you lie or are bragging. If that question comes up I jst say its very profitable and leave it at that but I think im going to start taking the OPs approach soon, so much easier.

Henry17 · #7 11-18-2007, 01:14 PM

I agree somewhat and have had some similar experiences but I just shut them down. If they start talking about poker I just tell them I deal with poker enough and this is my downtime so I would prefer to not talk about it.

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Then the question of how much you can actually make comes up.

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I can't believe people have the lack of class to ask this but they do. People know better then to ask me so now they ask my GF.

I understand the desire to lie in this situation. I can't count the number of times people have asked me "If I gave you money how much could you make me?" or people who comp my bill at their restaurant then try to get picks out of me. It is annoying and awkward and I've stopped going to certain places to avoid.

That being said if you lie about it they are going to find out eventually. My general approach with people who I'm rarely going to see is just to deflect the question. If they have any social skills they won't really push it and I end up avoiding the conversation without lying (mind you this has also led a lot of people to think I'm a drug dealer).

ahnuld · #8 11-18-2007, 01:27 PM

The worst is when people ask me how much iv made from poker. Iv never had another real job so thats pretty much my net worth. If it was ever worded that way they would never dare ask that, but they dont realize the difference. I think most people also assume its ok to ask about income for poker players because they viewed it as a real job. They dont ask a stranger at a party they were just introduced to how much he makes at his IT job but with poker it comes up immediately and is ok.

Also henry, I assumed you had made most of your cash from non poker related things. You play professionally/ semi-professionally as well?

Henry17 · #9 11-18-2007, 01:57 PM

I made most of my money from sports betting. Before and during university I had various jobs but I've never had a real job after law school. I've played poker since 92.

I've never answered the income question. My usual answer is more than a paperboy and less than Bill Gates. If I feel like I'm being challenged I'll go with "I choose this over being a lawyer so I make more than a lawyer but I rather not discuss money. It is in bad taste". You'll get the occasional person who won't get the hint but most will drop the subject.

Compared to the 90s it is easy now to explain to people choosing poker as an occupation. Poker is on TV. It is cool and popular. You can play online. There are more people choosing poker as a profession so odds are you will not be the only person they have met that does this.