serious post: My really good friends brother just commited suicide

[Vyse]

If she's a really good friend, why would you need advice on this...

[cardsharkk04]

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I think having to listen to a million people tell you "Im so sorry" would be exhausting.

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Yea I'm pretty sure everyone knows it sucks. But this is the first time something like this has happened to me so I figured some advice from people with similar experiences would be good. Thanks for your help.

[cardsharkk04]

Well this may be a bad post, whatever. I just felt like getting it off my chest. Time to sleep it off. Any more ass hole comments are appreciated.

[ElliotR]

My goodness, that is horrible. The "be there" advice is really all that can be said. There are many possible reactions to sudden deaths in general from rage to despair to self-destruction, so there cannot be any pat answer for you or for her. Just support her through this as you would through any other enormous tragedy.

[AceCR9]

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Part of my struggles with the fact that she is like the sweetest nicest girl I know and all of a sudden this happens. The other part of me is angry because I don't understand suicide at all, I mean my biggest fear is death, I just have never understood why someone would do it to themselves. [censored]

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google some stuff about suicide, I had to research some data for a paper once, found a lot of disturbing message boards/web sites by people who use the internet as their only means of expression/communicating their feelings.

at least for me, I sympathize with them, because its tough to really understand what they are going through internally.

[chesspain]

Anything along the lines of "That's really [censored] up; is there anything I can do?" is fine.

[EWS87]

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Yea I'm pretty sure everyone knows it sucks. But this is the first time something like this has happened to me so I figured some advice from people with similar experiences would be good. Thanks for your help.

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i kinda dont understand how anything happened to you here...ive been in your situation once (not exactly because the girl whose brother killed himself wasnt as close to me as this girl seems to you) but I kinda just let her grieve alone for a while with family...then tried to be there to get things back to normal...weve never talked about it to this day

[Nielsio]

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I have no clue what to say. This is so [censored] up, she found out this morning and I just found out about it a few hours ago. He was 25, her oldest brother. I really don't know what to do or what to say to her. Any advice is appreciated. thanks.

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The truth about the situation is that you know there were big problems in that person's life, of which a 95% chance that it had to do with their family, and thus the girl you are talking about has some issues (most likely unexplored issues), and now you are affraid to ask the questions that need to be asked. If you want to help someone, you *have* to open up the discussion about the core of the matter.

[wannabe2]

are u by chance from indiana?

[React1oN]

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I don't know if there is anything you can do or say for her. Just... be there.

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