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  #1  
Old 11-13-2007, 07:07 PM
mbillie1 mbillie1 is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: crazytown
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Default TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely

So I'm driving home from my work as an undercover alba manwhore or whatever today, pissed off that I got pwned in that thread cuz I had to leave to go home, and I head to the bookstore to pick up some books. I'm getting David Sedaris "Naked" and Jose Saramago "The Gospel According to Jesus Christ," both well-recommended fictions and by authors I like. So I walk straight in, get the books, walk directly to the front, register girl calls me over. She's tried this business in the past to no avail.

Register girl is like 5'2", fairly cute with reddish hair. But she's not a day over 18 if that (making me at least 7 years her senior), she has giant blue emo glasses and is wearing a WWJD bracelet. Three strikes bizzatch. She starts in:

her: "Wow you were quick, I saw you come in, you just went right over there huh? You must know what you like"

me: Yeah, I'm in kind of a hurry tonight

her: "So do you have a member card? (I say no) You doooon't? Well how bout filling one out? If nothing else you'll have a little more time to spend here with me..."

me: I don't think so, thanks though

her: "okay... your total is blah blah (gives me change, etc) ... I'm gonna put your receipt in 'naked', ooh... I hope you're trying to tell me something buying this"

me: *laughs, smiles* hey what are you doing later? why don't I get your number and we can meet up?

her: "sounds great!!" *giggles, smiles, scribbles number on paper, gives it to me*

me: great, thanks

I then proceed to spit out the gum I was chewing into the paper she just gave me, crumple it up, and hand it back to her, and say "now how about throwing that out for me?"

her: (stands there staring at me like i just punched a baby)

me: I'm pretty sure it's what jesus would do. (i then toss it towards her, she fumbles around and catches it, i walk out)

i am the harsher of mellows
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  #2  
Old 11-13-2007, 07:09 PM
bmwguy525 bmwguy525 is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Santa Barbara / On a mission to spread LOZL
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Default Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely

why not just hit it and quit it
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  #3  
Old 11-13-2007, 07:10 PM
mbillie1 mbillie1 is offline
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Default Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely

because this is funnier dammit
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  #4  
Old 11-13-2007, 07:12 PM
bmwguy525 bmwguy525 is offline
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Location: Santa Barbara / On a mission to spread LOZL
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Default Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely

you can make fun of people at their expense on the internet. real life is for making friends and having sex with females.
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  #5  
Old 11-13-2007, 07:13 PM
mbillie1 mbillie1 is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: crazytown
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Default Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely

yeah... i got a girlfriend already though, and i don't [censored] with the jesus people
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  #6  
Old 11-13-2007, 07:14 PM
4_2_it 4_2_it is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Trying to be the shepherd
Posts: 18,437
Default Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely

[ QUOTE ]
you can make fun of people at their expense on the internet. real life is for making friends and having sex with females.

[/ QUOTE ]

This is what my last fortune cookie said.
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  #7  
Old 11-13-2007, 07:14 PM
runningmarvel runningmarvel is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: deep down in the microlimits
Posts: 505
Default Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely

I cry LIES
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  #8  
Old 11-13-2007, 07:14 PM
DontRaiseMeBro DontRaiseMeBro is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 300
Default Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely

if this is true its very mean and op is an [censored].
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  #9  
Old 11-13-2007, 07:15 PM
Kimbell175113 Kimbell175113 is offline
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Location: The art of losing isn\'t hard to master.
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Default Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely

send her to me
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  #10  
Old 11-13-2007, 07:15 PM
rubbrband rubbrband is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: R VA
Posts: 2,766
Default Re: TR: bookstore girls hits on me, i harsh her mellow severely

[ QUOTE ]
5'2", fairly cute

[/ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ]
'naked', ooh... I hope you're trying to tell me something buying this"

[/ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ]
scribbles number on paper, gives it to me

[/ QUOTE ]
Then you diss her? I call bull [censored].
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