Goodbye and Thanks for all the Fish

[ChipFerFree]

I'm done.

I've played poker online for about 2.5 years. My net winnings are $19,800.32 plus the $52.12 I left sitting on FultTilt. (I guess I have 2 more 26 dollar donkaments left so I'm only partially lying -- call it a semi-bluff)

I made most of that 19k off of Party Poker in the first year to the tune of 14k.

Made about 5k off PS, FTP and Sun Poker in the second year.

I started with a bankroll of fifty bucks. Never made another deposit from my personal funds -- EVER. Just the first one for 50 on a cold and lonely night in a hotel far far away from home. And even then I remember thinking on that night -- is this really legal? Is this really a smart thing to be doing?

hmm sure go for it was the answer of course!

The first year went like this. 5+1 sng's on Party for about 3 months. 50 grows to about 400. I tell my sister what I've been doing -- she says hmm. You sure you should be doing this? I say, well no I'm not sure but it's kinda fun. She's kinda metaphysical and says how 'bout we read your Tarot. I say sure that's dumb but Okay.

She says ask the Tarot a question. I say I have two:

1) Can I make a living playing poker?
2) Is it morally right to be taking money from people in this manner?

Tarot answers:
1) yes
2) Answer this yourself

I say let's ask again and my sister suffles up the cards.

(Did you know that Tarot cards are really just a deck of cards like the ones we are playing with? -- I didn't but I found it interesting and a bit spoooooooky)

We ask the Tarot again and after the suffle the EXACT SAME CARDS are dealt. I chit you not. I take that as a final answer.

So I go back home and turn up the volume -- I play my first 50 SNG and come in first. That ramps me up and within a couple months I'm playing only 50, 100 or 200 sngs -- and winning like crazy. I jump into some bigger tournies like the PP 20K and 40K and do ok. Not great. Couple final tables a few 3rd's and 4th's -- it's all good. Life is good and then Party changes formats. - remember that? no more ten hands per blind. Now we are on timers like everyone else. Me no likee this. It changes my system... I'm serious...

Life ceases to be good on Party for some reason. Coulda been in my head -- doesn't matter. Not losin' but not winnin much either.

I add PS and FullTilt and Sun Poker to my arsenal of online casinos and do OK. Few grand over the course of the next year but my per hour win rate has fallen to maybe 5 to 10 bucks. Not good -- hell I can flip burgers for that amount of money.

Frist comes along a few months back and messes up my Neteller account. It may be just in my head (and on the books however) but for the last 6 months I've been spinning my wheels on both FullTilt and PS and I just can't take it anymore.

I'm not bad beat whining. I am however either experiencing a very long bad run or the competition has firmed up. I'm willing to except either answer or a combination of both. Both most certainly is the case -- I mean how fricken hard is it to learn how to play poker for God's sake -- I did!

Here's the gist: I've finally determined something VERY important about all this gambling stuff.

Any game that consumes this much time and energy and aggravates me to this extent cannot be good for my health. Think about it -- it's about feeding your aggressive hostility. You feed it and win and feel pretty good. You feed it and lose and well you know what that feels like. Blood pressure is rising in either case and that is a documented fact.

Pro's aren't supposed to get emotional so I'm clearly not one. Not many are. Few if any people can play without it affecting their blood pressure -- again that's for real -- why else do you think that vein in your head starts pumpin out the I GOT A MONSTER messages...

I decided to finish this part of my life up last night while playing a couple little 12 dolla 45 person tournys. Beat in both (and NOT badly I might add -- just beat) but enough is enough. Yes a string of bad beats has precipitated my retirement but it really was a culmination of events.

1) Bad beats make me pretty fricken mad and that can affect other aspects of my life

2) My win rate is falling so I can't rely on this to pay for my kidz private school anymore

3) Playing poker consumes A LOT of time which could be devoted back to more wholesome activities -- like hmmm my family

4) My kids are growing up and time is precious so maybe I should notice my kidz more and play poker A LOT LESS

5) I'm redirecting my time back to my family (startin to see a theme here?)

In fact I think I'll paint the house with that $800.32 check PS is sending me within the next 10 to 15 business days quote on quote.

So enjoy your game and don't get emotional if you can help it, but if you find that 6 months go by and you aren't paying for your daughter's private school with the proceeds any longer (or getting good grades in school, or selling as many nails to contractors or you fill in the blank)-- check out -- people in the real world need you more than you need the money.

Now the trick -- can I actually quit? What will I do with my time? What about the 52 bucks on FTP? What if I get lucky and win one of those last two donkaments? What if I don't?? Do I have the will power to quit? Well I don't really know but I'll keep you posted cause I'm sure you are just dying to know!

God bless you all and GL...

P.S. (and I don't mean PokerStars)
Watch for my tell all book coming out in about oh I'd say 6 months. The life and times of an ex-wannabe pro online poker player. It should be fascinating material and I should be able to pump it out pretty quickly given all my newly acquired free time!

PokerStars: ChipFerFree
Party Poker and FTP: ChipsFerFree
Sun Poker: FreeChips

[Spartan1983]

good luck, oh see u at the tables.

[Harv72b]

[ QUOTE ]
We ask the Tarot again and after the suffle the EXACT SAME CARDS are dealt. I chit you not. I take that as a final answer.

[/ QUOTE ]

Rigged.

Good luck.

[brendanb438]

Way too long. Tarot cards? Paying for kids private school with $20,000 over 2.5 years? Must be a cheap/shatty school.

Whine whine, biatch biatch. I hope you didn't play more than like 5 hours a week if that is all you made over 2.5 years playing those levels of SNGs. Because your win rate would be pretty damn shiatty.

-Brendan

[cardcounter0]

Good Luck. You are correct, Family comes first.

[BluffTHIS!]

[ChipFerFree]

[ QUOTE ]
Paying for kids private school with $20,000 over 2.5 years? Must be a cheap/shatty school.
-Brendan

[/ QUOTE ]

Well Brendan,

Aren't you the pleasant MF. I didn't intend to reply to anyone in this thread but simply can't resist since you attacked the one part I care about. I have one kid in elementary school -- 10K per year for her school -- I may play like shiat and freely admit so, but the school is not shiaty rather it is worth every red cent.

Try to be constructive with your words JUST ONE TIME in your life and you may find it changes you into a moderately tolerable person...

--Chips

[BluffTHIS!]

[ChipFerFree]

[ QUOTE ]
Way too long.
-Brendan

[/ QUOTE ]

Oh and while I'm at it you may want to seek help with what might be a nasty attention deficit disorder... I mean it was almost a WHOLE PAGE of text to get through. Browse on my fine angry and sarcastic friend...

[BluffTHIS!]