Live at the Mirage

[Reckless1der]

Every time I go to Las Vegas, I allow for one stop at what I used to consider to be the Mecca of poker, the Mirage. I keep detailed records of all my play, and I am net positive nearly everywhere else I play but I always get killed at the Mirage. The 1st three times I played there, over the span of about 5 years, I always lost my entire $150 buy-in at just the 3/6-limit table. Call me a glutton for punishment; I made my way over to pay homage to the Gods once again on in my most recent LV trip. So I get there at about 6:00 on a Friday Night, and there are 14 names in front of me on the 3/6 board. The Brush tells me it will be about 30- 45-minute wait, maybe longer. Impatient, I ask her what else is available, and she tells me I can get into a 6/12 game right away. I take a gulp and tell her “What the hell, show me the way.” I buy-in for $500 and I tell myself to just tighten up and I’ll be all right. I internally resolve to not open limp, only call a raise with an S&M group 1 hand, and preferably reraise, play fit or fold post flop. In other words, I’m going to be a total nit.

The first playable hand that came my way was a suited KJ in middle position. I was in seat 9, there was no seat 10, and the button was at Seat 3. I was getting pumped up to throw in my first open raise when dash it all, a Woman in Seat 7 beats me to it. I give some thought to calling, but stick to my resolutions, I respect this EP raise, and fold. Wouldn’t you know, the hand goes to show down, and the Babe takes down the pot with a pair of Kings, 10 Kicker (the Kings took it alone); I would have won it with 2 pair had I gone. It’s another 10 hands or so before I get my second glance at something playable in the way of A-10 off. Damned if the Bitch doesn’t open raise in front of me again, this time I’d a called if I was suited, but into the muck they go. Sure enough it goes to show down and the A-10o would have been a winner. Three orbits into the game and I have seen a grand total one flop, which I got by checking the big blind. I’m down about $33 when I should have been up at least that much if I had I played those 2 hands. I’m not tilting yet, but I am starting to steam, so I key in on the lady. She always comes in with a raise, which is a good enough strategy, but the problem is she mixes in crap every now and then with her legitimately strong starters. But she has been on a bit of a rush and has been the biggest winner at the table since I got there. Two sharpies in Seats 3 and 4 are kind teasing and flirting with her, telling her how good she is, and how she has been pwning them. In watching her I see that even though she is a bit laggy preflop, she’s a transparent rock post-flop, betting and raising when she connects with the flop, checking and folding when she doesn’t. So I cook up the following play to maintain my sanity. The next time she comes in when I’m in late position, I’m going to 3-town to isolate her. If she checks the flop, I will auto bet anything and hopefully take it down right there. If we are still together at the turn I will have to play fit or fold. So I get the button, but she doesn’t go, and I fold my typical junk. I’m in the cut-off on the next hand and here She comes. I’m about to pull the trigger but look at my hole cards to find 9-3 off, I mean no redeeming quality whatsoever, so into the muck they go and I ponder if I should have even looked at my cards.

So now I’m in late middle position on the next hand when here she comes in again. With 2 behind me, and the 2 blinds yet to act, half of the table will be after me pre-flop and it’s going to be risky to run the play now, but damn it all. I have been here nearly an hour and I want to play. The prospect of having to wait another orbit is unpalatable. I look down to find 5-7 off. Against my better judgment, I select the option to go to preserve my mental health (maybe it was too late already). The possibility that they could make a straight being the deciding factor. I take a deep breath and fire three. I watch with bated breathe as the cut-off, button, and small blind fold in rapid succession. So far, so good when, uh-oh, the Big Blind in Seat 4 breaks the rhythm. I can’t tell if he’s going to fold, call, or raise until he finally announces the call and throws in 2 cold. Seat 7 calls as expected.

Off to the flop we go: 4, 2, 8, all black, two suits. I’m pretty happy to see a ragged flop that likely missed them. It went check, check to me “Alrighty then, showtime” I thought and I expected to get the pot right there with a $6 bet. Quicker than diarrhea, Seat 4 check raises, and the Bitch can’t fold fast enough. I’m left out in the open, with my hand caught in the Cookie Jar. I put Seat 4 on an overpair and I know already I’m going to fold, but just delay things to make it look plausible that I have a decision. “Maybe he has AK, or AQ” they will think. I had already lifted my cards in the air to throw them into the muck, when it occurred to me that I have an 11:1 shot at hitting a gutter. So in mid motion, I pull the cards back and start counting the bets: 3 players * 3 bets, that’s 9 preflop; my flop bet is 10; and 11, 12 with the check raise. The small blind took care of the rake, damn if it isn’t slightly PEV to peel here. Thin but correct nevertheless, especially if you consider the implied odds, which could send this thing through the roof should I hit. It must have looked very odd to everyone else when I put the cards back down and tossed 6 more chips into the pot instead. Alas, just as I do that I think “flush draw”. I actually don’t have 4 clean outs, but maybe only 3. No sooner do I think “Red 6”, when the dealer turns over the most beautiful 6 of Hearts I have ever seen in my life. Buddy Boy in Seat 4 doesn’t even stop to look at it and has 12 of his chips hitting the felt at about the same time as my gin card. I announce $24 and toss in 5 Redbirds. His eyes say “I’m not buying it”, as he tosses in 5 Redbirds of his own. Telepathically, I tell him “You better believe it [censored]” when I put in one of my Greenies. We are heads up now and the house rules allow us to go to the felt if we want to but he is good enough to know to put on the brakes and he calls. But he doesn’t slow down for long when out pops the King of Clubs on the river, “$12!!! ” he declares. Damn, I think, of all the luck, he rivered a flush, but on closer inspection I determine the board has two spades, and two clubs; this poor Bastard has a set of Kings. In a tone that says, if you insist I said “I raise to $24” and put 5 more Redbirds into the pot. This causes him to pause, and I can just see the tumblers turning in this head, this may be the first time he sees the straight, but logic tells him I have got to have Dogs Balls or the Devils’ hand (888 or 666 of course), either way it leads him to the conclude raise “$36!”. Think again buddy, it’s your worse nightmare “$48!”. He knows right there that he’s beat, but understandably has to give me $12 more.

I know I’m likely to get punched out if I yell “SHIPIT HOLLA” right here, so elect to go with the next worse thing, “I got the nuts baby” as I flip over 5-7off with a shrug of the shoulders. The dealer waits a second or three to see if it’s a split. Dude is just a heap of mush sitting there not even moving. I guess he’s trying to figure out when he could have gotten out of the train wreck. After enough time has passed for him to claim a split, she starts push the $270+/- pot my way. Naturally I am overcome by happiness, and cannot conceal the biggest smile I have had since Ronald Reagan was the President.

For some odd reason all of this action has sent Seat 3 into a FULL-ON ANGRY TILT. Apparently, I managed to break some kind of law at the Mirage and it’s his job to administer justice. He literally screams at me from directly across the table yelling “You 3-bet, 5-7 off Pre Flop???? YOU IDIOT!!!”. It seemed to me like the whole room went quiet for a brief second, as players from the other tables stopped to see what the commotion was all about, but after looking at the [censored] they went back to their hands and I was relieved when I heard a couple of chuckles. You come to expect this kind of behavior online these days, but this is the first time I have ever witnessed anything remotely close to it in real life, and here I am at the center of it all. Maybe I would stop to explain my actions if it was a friend, but this [censored] deserved no such respect. I mean he wasn’t even in the hand other than having to fold his small blind, big [censored] deal. The fact that I had been there for over 30 hands and saw exactly one flop was lost on this clown.

Well wouldn’t you know, before too long the cards are flying and action is back on me when I look down to find AA, serious as passing a kidney stone. Of course I raise her up, and my new best friend who is now on the button now isn’t buying it. It’s four bets from each of us before we see the flop. The flop comes K high, and another four bets each go in as we head to the turn. The board starts getting scary at this point; I lead out on the turn, but am forced to go into check down mode when Seat 3 fires it back at me. The river is pure hell. The board now has 2 Paints, 2 Tens, and 3 Spades. Talk about monsters under the bed, they are all out here in plain view: Quads, Boat, Flush, Broadway; even a G.D. Royal was possible and as sure as I wipe my ass after a good steamer, I’m positive my Aces are cracked when Archie keeps charging along. I check, he bets, I call. He proudly declares “Kings over Queens”, as if to imply some kind of irony. “Pretty good ole boy, but Aces over Tens are better, no?” The whole table is on tilt now as the Dealer shoves a pot approaching $200 my way. I haven’t even finished stacking my chips from the last pot, and am tempted to leave them in a heaping mound going forward.

Seat 3 went busto soon afterwards. He says “I love beating fish like you” as he was leaving, of course I urged him to rebuy. Seat 4 was severely crippled by the 1st exchange and never did recover. But the best beat of all happened when my nemesis in Seat 7 got up to leave. She actually had an attractive enough face, with perfect hair, make-up, tan skin, and expensive jewelry which included a rock on her ring finger that would make for even odds if someone set the over/under line at 2 Carats. Anyway, she was wearing silky athletic sweats over a Spandex/Lycra top. From all indications she looked like someone that you would expect to be wealthy, probably living in an Orange County McMansion that didn’t have to work for a living. It was my guess that she probably had a health club membership that wasn’t being wasted. From the table up, I would swear my read was dead on the money, but it turned out I was entirely wrong. Although she was HWP from the breadbasket up, she had the biggest, most unbelievable butt I have ever seen since Jane Curtin in an old SNL skit. She couldn’t help but bump it into a couple of guys as she weaved her way through the tables to the cashiers cage.

[Sevenfold]

Could someone read this and let me know what it says?

[Arbitrage]

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Could someone read this and let me know what it says?

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could you stop sucking?

[Photoc]

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Could someone read this and let me know what it says?

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could you stop sucking?

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Really, I didn't get that from reading the OP. [img]/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img]

[Iplayragstoo]

"NH"

[GutPunch]

decent read...

However I can't believe you didn't say anything to the nitty old man who insulted you. Not once but twice!! I would have responded harshly with the wittiest thing I could think of at the time.

Half the fun of busting old guys with 57o is responding to their comments..

[DayTripping]

[ QUOTE ]
I keep detailed records of all my play, and I am net positive nearly everywhere else I play but I always get killed at the Mirage. The 1st three times I played there, over the span of about 5 years, I always lost my entire $150 buy-in at just the 3/6-limit table.

[/ QUOTE ]

After reading your painfully long and detailed post (which included such gems as "as sure as I wipe my ass after a good steamer" and repeatedly referring to a female player as "that bitch") I now understand why you are a regular loser at the Mirage, and probably most other casinos for that matter.

[youtalkfunny]

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After reading your painfully long and detailed post (which included such gems as "as sure as I wipe my ass after a good steamer" and repeatedly referring to a female player as "that bitch")...

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This is why, when confronted with a very long OP, it's a good idea to read the first few replies first, to see if the long read is worth the time.

After reading this post, I'll pass on the long one.

[Reckless1der]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
After reading your painfully long and detailed post (which included such gems as "as sure as I wipe my ass after a good steamer" and repeatedly referring to a female player as "that bitch")...

[/ QUOTE ]

This is why, when confronted with a very long OP, it's a good idea to read the first few replies first, to see if the long read is worth the time.

After reading this post, I'll pass on the long one.

[/ QUOTE ]

I'm sorry you feel that way, and I don't really care if you read it or not. Just know that you shouldn't be so easily swayed by the sentiments of a dried out ----. The OP has received several rave reviews over at BBV. Even the moderator had this to say

"This is a good post and I encourage everyone to read it" seriously, see post #8992511.

but whatever./

[Fiksdal]

lol this forum apparently sucks given the harsh responses to OP. This is a great post, would definitely read again.