santa sensei's 5 days of christmas

[Knightsridge]

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ship me a half full bottle of gin and 9 cigarettes and I'll be fine thanks

cos i'm dead and an alien and my grandma stole my shoes to throw at her neighbour who is a rat like an actual real live rat the kind you set traps for and anyway so my grandma you know my grandma well she stole my shoes well borrowed them if you like cos she'll probably give them back but the point of the story is you know shoes are not even necessary man all you need is like sandals or something and maybe not even sandals maybe just like leaves or something or maybe even just going barefoot would be fine who knows but what i'm really trying to say is that we can't really help ourselves when it comes to selling mangoes for an inflated price to disabled people

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forget the pens, give this man some leaves for his feet