The "Never Say" Book

[AngusThermopyle]

"Who's it up to?"

One guess Sherlock. The fact that everybody is staring at you might provide a clue.

[DrVanNostrin]

[ QUOTE ]
"Donkey" anyone that calls someone a donkey

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QFT

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I was the first BB in a single table and said "I like to go all in on my first BB." I proceeded to look down at AA and got 2 callers.

River went check check with some a-hole "I have a 4 card flush." Board was [img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] He says "good" and mucks. Dealer says "Jack high wins." The guy then says "you said flush" everyone at the table simultaniously says "no he said 4 card flush." Everyone hated this guy to say the least (so did the dealer).

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What am I missing? Didn't your aces win the pot? Was it a very small main pot and large side pot?

[StarkNaked]

When someone says, "I have two PAIRS"

DAMNIT ITS TWO PAIR NOT TWO PAIRS YOU MOUTH-BREATHING PIECE OF asldjglsakgjlkasjglkasgjlksgjlsadkjlsadgjlagk!!!!! !!!!!!

[GreedIsGood]

"Oh! I have a straight!"

Yea, like they thought they were calling with a jack high...

[swope]

[ QUOTE ]
"ship it"

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worst ever.

[IHeartEmoKids]

[ QUOTE ]
"I raise" when first into the pot.

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obv a 2p2er

"You have three choices each time you act during a poker hand: fold, call, or raise. Betting is just raising when the current bet is zero. Likewise, checking is just calling when the current bet is zero." - SSHE

[jok3rzwild]

This has happend to me 2x.

Being asked "hey do you have cards?" or "are you in the hand"

And the worst, "how much do you have left" Its like dude, just bet any amount. (usually when asked the player has a big hand)

Or when Player A take a while to make a decision, then it comes to Player B, and he jst has to waste as equal time to fold (obviously) like the 5minutes Player A took wasn't enough!

[WRR1986]

"Can you wash the decks, I've gotten these exact same cards twice in a row"
(in a room with autoshufflers, where the hands were dealt with DIFFERENT DECKS)

[Leibniz]

[ QUOTE ]
When someone says, "I have two PAIRS"

DAMNIT ITS TWO PAIR NOT TWO PAIRS YOU MOUTH-BREATHING PIECE OF asldjglsakgjlkasjglkasgjlksgjlsadkjlsadgjlagk!!!!! !!!!!!

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I hate to tell you, but you are the mouth breather. "Two pairs" is grammatically correct. If you have one pair (that's singular because there is only one). If you have more than one pair then it's plural, yielding "two pairs." Although, it seems that using the word pair in the plural sense is gaining acceptance, so I'd have to say that both are acceptable, but "two pairs" is more consistent with english grammar.

Dictionary.com Source

[EWillers]

[ QUOTE ]
DAMNIT ITS TWO PAIR

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Damnit it's "it's" when used as a contraction and "its" when used as a possessive. I only bring it up due to the irony of poor grammar in a post relating to grammar/diction.

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"Two pairs" is grammatically correct. If you have one pair (that's singular because there is only one).

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I think the thinking behind the poker usage of "two pair" lay in the idea that at a showdown every player has exatctly one "category" of hand. "Two pair" is a category just like "straight" or "one pair".

Personally I use "two pairs", but can definitely see either as being acceptable.