Bizarre injuries you've suffered

[Steven_Q_Erkel]

2 years ago I was warming up for the tennis season with a friend at one of the local courts. When we finish I walk up the few little stairs and reach for the door to the gated court, push it open..it gets stuck. I quickly realize my mistake and try to pull it towards me so we can get out of there. I fix my footing to get a solid pulling grip on the door...give it a huge pull, the door flies open towards me hitting my left leg directly on the kneecap popping it out and forcing me into a funky sideways flip off the stairs and back on to the ground. After putting 2 and 2 together I pull my kneecap back in to place and strut to the hospital.

[KilgoreTrout]

Probably standard, but I tore a hip flexor putting presents in the car on christmas morning 2005. I was at Foxwoods playing 10/20 from about 10:00 pm on the 23rd to around 6:00 pm on the 24th. Guess all the time playing cards put a gimp in my back.

The present in question weighed about 2 pounds. I just twisted my back the perfect way, felt the pop, and dropped to the ground. A neighbor thought I had suffered a heart attack.

[ohead]

I was shot in the face when I was 14 with .22 cal revolver, that kinda sucked.

[biakabutukafan]

When I was about eight, I put a sleeping bag over my head with my arms sticking up. I was pretending to be a ghost. I went to fall on my bed, but not being able to see where my bed is, I missed and caught the corner of the bed frame face first. I wasn't able to catch myself because of my arms being straight up in the sleeping bag. The reslut was me biting through my bottom lip. I still have a scar on the outside and a little flap on the inside.

[Just]

last summer me and gf moved, to a house whit a garden that slopes quit alot, so the landlord came to show me how to mow it according to his standard.(nothing special, just normal mowing). it ends up whit him mowing, and me standing around smoking. The lawnmower catches a gravel sized rock, spins it a round, than spits it out the back, the rock directly impact my dick

that hurt like a [censored]

[En Passant]

I think I have a good one. Before one of my highschool bowling matches, my ball got stuck in the ball return. It was spinning like crazy and wouldn't come out. So, like any other smart person, I tried spinning the ball the other way so that it would come out. Well, it was spinning so hard that this didn't work, and my finger got stuck in the ball return. The pain wasnt that bad, untill someone else's bowling ball came up into the ball return, putting more pressure on my finger. After screaming like a girl, one of the coaches was able to lift the machine so that I was able to remove my finger.

My finger was bleeding and really swollen, but everything turned out okay. I did miss that day's epic match, however.

[ItalianFX]

When I was younger, like 7-8 years old, I was mad at my babysitter (cousin) so I took a pad of paper and a pen and started stabbing the paper with the pen. My cousin ripped the paper out of my hand and I ended up stabbing myself in the palm. I had a little red dot on my palm for like 10 years until one day I picked away the skin so it could heal underneath.

[microbet]

[ QUOTE ]
I had a bad cough last week (and lingering into this week), and I think I have pulled a rib muscle from coughing so hard. Bizarre--every time I sneeze, or cough, or move a certain way, there's a stabbing pain in my side.

I also notice that this week a MLB player blew out his knee while arguing with an umpire.

Anyone else experienced this, or something similarly bizarre?

[/ QUOTE ]

There was a guy in my high school who had broken ribs and claimed it was from coughing or sneezing (I don't remember which - long time ago).

I got a lot of injuries, but they were like football and skateboarding and not bizarre at all. I did stab myself in the leg with a utility knife trying to get laminate off a kitchen counter once. That hurt a lot, but not nearly as much as when I washed it out.

[sonneti]

I got piles from a massive water slide on holiday..

I have a couple of dumb ones that happened when I was around 17-18 I think.

The first one I would say is pretty bizarre...

Me and a friend were on our bikes on our way home from tennis and of course talking about girls.
I had hooked up with this girl at a party the weekend before and I was trying to explain what I thought was the best way to pleasure this girl. My personal technique so to speak.

As I'm doing this I'm waving my hands around and as I get to the point where I'm trying to show what I do with my fingers between this girl's legs, I for some stupid reason, I guess I was just really getting into it and I remember closing my eyes even, I lower my hands while making more or less obscene gestures with my fingers and of course all of the sudden... [censored] OUCH [censored] ... my fingers are stuck in my [censored] front wheel!!!!
This WHILE riding, in case you missed it!

Very very painful but thankfully also very quick.
I don't think I've ever pulled my hand away from something so fast.

Result = nothing broken just a couple of sprained fingers.

Some other dumb/freak ones have been where I've following missing a scoring opportunity in soccer, have kicked the goal post in anger and as a result sprained my big toe.