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#351
11-02-2007, 02:21 PM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
[ QUOTE ]
Dane Cook qualified for this thread last night during his appearance on Conan. OMG it was so awkward. Dane: So you know how at every Halloween party there's that guy who's dressed as a penis? Conan: No. Dane: Oh come on, you know, the guy with the penis costume? Conan: Uh... ok, sure. Dane: Well here's what I decided to do! Next year I'm going to dress up as a giant vagina! Conan: ... Dane: And I'm gonna bump into him all night! [audience mildly snickers] Dane: And if there isn't a guy there dressed as a penis, well at least I'll have a couple dudes trying to talk to me all night! [uncomfortable silence in the theater] Dane: Oh come on, give me something! [audience starts scattered, defeated applause] Wow, poor Dane Cook. Is this on YouTube yet? [/ QUOTE ] Dane Cook has yet to make me laugh..... gimme Carlos Mencia 
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#353
11-02-2007, 02:41 PM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] Dane Cook qualified for this thread last night during his appearance on Conan. OMG it was so awkward. Dane: So you know how at every Halloween party there's that guy who's dressed as a penis? Conan: No. Dane: Oh come on, you know, the guy with the penis costume? Conan: Uh... ok, sure. Dane: Well here's what I decided to do! Next year I'm going to dress up as a giant vagina! Conan: ... Dane: And I'm gonna bump into him all night! [audience mildly snickers] Dane: And if there isn't a guy there dressed as a penis, well at least I'll have a couple dudes trying to talk to me all night! [uncomfortable silence in the theater] Dane: Oh come on, give me something! [audience starts scattered, defeated applause] Wow, poor Dane Cook. Is this on YouTube yet? [/ QUOTE ] Dane Cook has yet to make me laugh..... gimme Carlos Mencia [/ QUOTE ] lol? This is like saying I don't really like eating my own vomit cold. Gimme warm vomit.
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#354
11-02-2007, 02:50 PM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
[ QUOTE ]
Dane Cook is in serious danger of getting a sweet haymaker thrown on him next Halloween [/ QUOTE ] I like what you did here. It made me laugh.
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#355
11-02-2007, 03:01 PM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
[ QUOTE ]
This is like saying I don't really like eating my own vomit cold. Gimme warm vomit. [/ QUOTE ] I like your contribution to the theme of the thread. [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
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#356
11-02-2007, 03:30 PM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] This is like saying I don't really like eating my own vomit cold. Gimme warm vomit. [/ QUOTE ] I like your contribution to the theme of the thread. [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [/ QUOTE ] It really wasn't supposed to be a- forget it. Dane Cook and Carlos Mencia are both terrible hacks.
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#357
11-02-2007, 03:48 PM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ] This is like saying I don't really like eating my own vomit cold. Gimme warm vomit. [/ QUOTE ] I like your contribution to the theme of the thread. [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [/ QUOTE ] It really wasn't supposed to be a- forget it. Dane Cook and Carlos Mencia are both terrible hacks. [/ QUOTE ] You're right, I'd rather have Paul Bunyan.
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#358
11-02-2007, 05:14 PM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
Today in Psychology,the professor was talking about Erik Erikson's theory of psychological development and she asks this question, "Who here has the grandma that moved to Maui and started to jet ski at the age of 80?" No one answers. She then asks, "So what did your grandma's do for the first time when they turned 80?" I shout out "They died".
Silence. Teacher gives me weird look with a sort of smirk on her face but she doesn't know whether it's ok to laugh, but I just turn away and she continues with the discussion.
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#359
11-03-2007, 10:58 PM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
My attempt to keep this thread alive...
Friend of mine named Ted is playing 4-8 at the Orleans a few nights ago. One of the usual old guy-locals, who Ted is sitting next to, raises preflop, bets every street and gets called down by another old guy. Bettor says, "Aah, I was bluffing" and mucks his cards. As the pot is being pushed, he adds, "Man, I hate getting caught with egg on my face." Ted says, "Well, then maybe you shouldn't wear an egg hat." No one laughs. Ted happens to love when people don't laugh at his jokes, so he taps the old guy on the shoulder and says, "Did you hear what I just said? About not wearing an egg hat?" Then Ted laughed at his own wittiness for a while, came to work and told the story to anyone who would listen.
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#360
11-08-2007, 01:55 AM
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Re: jokes you\'ve made IRL that flopped
One time in high school french, we had to write 8 sentences about a comic strip of our choice and present it to the class. I forgot completely, and had nothing when I went into class, so when it was my turn to go I replaced every word possible with "smurf."
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