Toss Vegas TR -- Real Time Edition

[toss]

A trip report as it happens.

The stars remained hidden above murky ominous clouds as we head towards Vegas in our rented silver Ford Cobalt. I sat awake. I could never sleep on the way to Vegas; the promise of senseless gambling conjoined with cheap booze excited my blood like nothing else could. The requisite four hours passed quickly and by midnight we saw the first glimpse of the Vegas glow of the horizon. Half an hour later we pulled next to the Cancun hotel and resort.

Find a damn parking space, unload the luggage, shoot one off into the toilet — all part of the mundane ritual leading up to the reaaaal gamboling. It’s the same as pouring milk into the cereal; putting toothpaste onto your teeth, squeezing on the condom before sex: the duty before booty. It’s late and were in no mood to go clubbin’ with out twenty acquaintances who’ve all arrived hour earlier. So we eat. Pyramid café located at Luxor is our choice, because my friends are pretty indecisive. I had to choose so I chose. It sucks, don’t eat there. There should be a law against putting only two fking meatballs in a huge plate of spaghetti.

Anyway, my friends decide to catch a few zzz’s while I head to the poker room at Mandalay Bay at the mean time. Friends sleep, Toss gambols — you know the drill… if you read any of my previous TRs. 200 NL is the game, I buy-in full. Start off playing aggro 6-handed, and they get out of my way. First hand I get played back at I have A[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]Q[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] on a 6[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]6[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] board. 6 donkeys check to me and I fire $50 into a $75 pot. Asian ganstur with some hardcore tats minraises me and I call. He pushes arr-in on the turn and I muck because he talks too damn much. He shows 76o for trips. I’m down to $138 and I get all-in HU vs the SB for a race; I don’t improve and I loss. $18 left, I go all-in blind. White guy calls, his white friend minraises, and the first white guy reminraises LOL. Doesn’t it seem like every freakin’ donkey comes to the poker room in twos nowadays? So I triple the up when I suckout with runner runner straight. Next hand I straddle UTG and get 7 callers, so I push obviously. Armenian middle-aged guy calls because “someone gotta do it” and he wins with KQo vs my A9o. BUSTO! I hate poker so I taxi back to Cacun hotel

Gotta split, headed to the Vegas outlet. More sooner or later. With pictures!

P.S. I can see straight.

[punkass]

better luck toss! i wish i was in vegas. get some good pictures man!

[RadGrad2005]

I am stuck here all week with nothing to do. Please take some good pics and post, especially pictures of hot, barely-clothed girls. I will vicariously live through you through your real time TRs. Please win so that I will not be depressed as I live vicariously through you. And please get some pussy, too.

[pig4bill]

Cancun hotel and resort? I had to look it up.

Judging by some of the travel reviews, it should make for an entertaining TR.

[Diana Ross Fan]

Gl next (non-table)game [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]. Don't waste time with those Mongoloid Bay nits.

[steamboatin]

[ QUOTE ]
get some good pictures man!

[/ QUOTE ]

except for when you are squeezing one off in the toilet, don't post that photo.

[SpleenLSD]

You're a TR maestro. Looking forward to the rest.

[scotty-win]

What's the latest?

[budblown]

Dahahhahaha, Cancun Resort, hahahahaha - I used to work for Pacific Monarch Resorts or Monarch Grand Vacations, whatever the hell they are calling themselves these days. They used to send me out there and I refused to stay at that resort, it was dogshit (atleast when I was there ~2 yrs ago), and made them put me up at Mandalay Bay.

[toss]

Sorry the delay guys. Had no access to the internet for the rest of the trip. So starting where I left off...

The taxi has gone a minutes before I notice the mind-blowingly drunk hot girl sitting to my right. The ride goes something like this:

"Umm, who are you?"
"Hueeeeeeeeh heeeeeeeeu huaaaaaah?"
"Are you staying at the Cancun?"
"Hueeeeeh haaaaaah huaaaaagh!"
"Uhh, hey taxi driver who is this person?"
"Vat! You dount know 'er?! Vy dount you say et?!"
"Hey relax man I'll pay for her fare. So, where are staying?"
"Huaaaaaaah haaa aht lefht."

I give up and we arrive at the Cancun.

"Vy don't you take 'er to your room?"
"I'm not going to do that. Look, keep the change and take care of her alright?"

I leave feeling a bit sorry for the drunken girl and her uncertain fate. I stumble into the hotel room and quickly go to sleep.

The sun was dull the next day leaving the weather comfortable and cool. I head with one of my friends to the Sports Bar right in the middle of the Cancun resort. The decor is vaguely Carribean and decidedly plain, but that doesn't bother me too much as long as the booze is good. We take a seat at the bar and immediately decide on the special: the Watermelon Twist. It's slushy, it's green, and it certainly did not taste like watermelon. Best of all you drank it out of a plastic football-shaped cup. We watched the USC/Oregon game and drank this unexpectedly strong drink. I could tell because my friend's face was as red as koolaid within the first few sips. I order a refill a few minutes later and we head back to the hotel room for some Wii Sports action.

If you haven't played any Wii Sports before then you should. Preferably drunk. All you do is flail your arms like a madman to win. My arm-flailing capabilities increases greatly the drunker I am so I naturally take the first set in Wii Tennis.



Here's a picture of me celebrating as I crush the competition. For some reason I'm wearing an air force suit. I suck down some more green slush to keep my drunk going and serve up some aces to easily take the second and third sets.



I win the championship Wii-belt of the universe. Unfortunately I lose it shortly after I run out of drinks.

I must rest for now. Next part tomorrow.