Illegal Immigrant Status for all Citizens

[pokerbobo]

I got this in an email.... supposedly it is an actual letter sent to Harkin. Kind of shows the anti-illegal immigration stance pretty well and with a touch of humor.


(Actual letter from an Iowa resident and sent to his US Senator)
4-18-7


The Honorable Tom Harkin
731 Hart Senate Office Building
Phone (202) 224 3254
Washington DC, 20510


Dear Senator Harkin,


As a native Iowan and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.


My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal alien stems from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out.


Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005.


Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year.


Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications, as well as " in-state" tuition rates for many colleges throughout the United States for my son.


Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car.


If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative.


Thank you for your assistance.


Your Loyal Constituent,

[pvn]

Thank you for posting chain letters to the forum. We all forgot about this one since the last time it was posted two months ago.

[iron81]

This was funnier the first time it was posted. Not funny, but funnier.

Edit: Curses. But seriously, citizens can do everything this guy wants to do right now by just breaking the law. The letter is utterly retarded.

[pokerbobo]

sorry...must have missed it the last time thru

[goodsamaritan]

Lighten up guys. It was mildly amusing

[bobman0330]

[ QUOTE ]
Lighten up guys. It was mildly amusing

[/ QUOTE ]

Yep. Xenophobic propaganda always gives me a laugh. I'd say more, but I have to get back to watching The Birth of a Nation.

[cardcounter0]

[ QUOTE ]
Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could save almost $10,000 a year.

[/ QUOTE ]
Hahahahahaha! As a citizen, you can do that right now. Have fun using the emergency room as your primary health care provider without insurance. hahahahaha! You will find it funny.


[ QUOTE ]
Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school applications, as well as " in-state" tuition rates for many colleges throughout the United States for my son.

[/ QUOTE ]
Hahahahaha! Please show the law school that provides preferential treatment to illegal aliens. But the really funny part is, for your son, if you move to the State he is attending school, you will get in-state tuition. Hahahaha!


[ QUOTE ]
Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my car.


[/ QUOTE ]
Hahahahaha! As a citizen, you don't need a DL or insurance to operate a motor vehicle. Just watch out for the police. hahahahahahaha!

[iron81]

I don't know which is more annoying: Pokerbobo posting this letter again, or Cardcounter going back, looking at his response at the time and virtually copy/pasting it in here.

[TomCollins]

[ QUOTE ]
This was funnier the first time it was posted. Not funny, but funnier.

Edit: Curses. But seriously, citizens can do everything this guy wants to do right now by just breaking the law. The letter is utterly retarded.

[/ QUOTE ]

This would be a lot funnier if anything in it was true. Tell Lou Dobbs I said hi.

[captZEEbo]

the govt would prefer that illegal aliens pay taxes, so they are offering them a break to pay the taxes and all future taxes. What's so hard to figure out about it?