MISH MASH 5: THE SHORTLINENING (GAME THREAD)

[shortline99]

I will be posting in this thread every so often in days leading up to the game in order to advance the storyline. All rule clarifications will go in the signup thread. The only person posting in this thread until the game begins will be me. All other posts will be deleted.

Thank you.

[shortline99]

Ask me no questions, and I will tell you no lies.

IT IS NIGHT.




Poggopolis. The loudest quiet city in the world. The biggest small city in the world. There's a twist around every corner and caution in every step. No one is to be trusted, yet trust is all most of us have. It's a delicate balance, and it's coming undone.





That's the state of things in the future. The disinformation age. Confusion is a currency. Deception is our only protection. Everyone has a secret. Anyone who says they have nothing to hide is the last one you should trust.

Fortunately, we have our superheroes. We have our saints. We have our gods. But we also have our villains. Our demons.

What happens when our heroes forsake us?



It began with the chip implants. The government was losing control. They told us our freedom depended on sacrificing our secrets. All our information on a single hard drive in our heads that they could read at will. Mandatory disclosure. The chips were everywhere, in everyone, from the greatest hero to the lowliest scum in the prisons. A great equalizer. If this was freedom, it scared the hell out of us.





It wasn't long before the new system began to break down. Hackers broke down the coded barriers. Free information reigned. Then they made viruses, viruses where only they had the cure. Viruses that could attack our minds. They held thousands, millions hostage. This wasn't freedom.

Who would save us? Our heroes. Our superheroes.



August 21st, 2106.

An EMP rocks a city held against its will by cyberterrorists. Every piece of electronic equipment in the city shuts down in a magical array of dimming lights. Slowly the city fades. The hard drives in our heads stop buzzing. Everything gets very, very, very quiet.



August 22nd, 2106.

We rebuild. Machines are replaced. The Daily Planet prints again. Banks reopen. Computer systems go online. Ding-ding. Chink-chink. We piece together the stories. Everything is speculation and rumor.

We hear about the deeds of our superheroes. Batman, Superman, Wonderwoman, all the supers working together to save a city in need. Thank God for them. We see the pictures and hear the stories. We celebrate them. We toast them on the streets and in our homes. No longer tagged and bound by our identities... is this anarchy? Is this freedom?





Then why... did everything get so cold?

And where have our heroes gone?

[shortline99]

***MISH MASH NEWS FLASH***

THE DAILY PLANET – August 23rd, 2106

EXTRA! EXTRA! FIRST BANK OF POGGOPOLIS ROBBED!

Still in the last throes of celebration, Poggopolis was hit yesterday by a startling bank robbery that left the First Bank of Poggopolis in ruins. The robbery is thought to have occurred around 4 in the morning. Amazingly, no cash has been reported missing; only a single safety deposit box in the vault seems to have been disturbed at this time.



The box, belonging to local physician and professor of medicine Dr. Pieter Cross, contains a small sample of kryptonite, a rare element with few known uses.



Police have no leads in the case, reporting a strange lack of evidence at the scene. Reports indicate that Sherlock Holmes may be called in to assist the Poggopolis Police Department.

Only one suspicious object has been found...



***MISH MASH NEWS FLASH***

[shortline99]

***MISH MASH NEWS FLASH***

Good evening. This is the late news, with --- CRSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHRSCCCCKKKK .--.






-----------------------------------



Hello, Poggopolis. This is a message from Lex Luthor.

I must say that I am glad to see you've all recovered from that little virus scare. I'm afraid things didn't really work out as planned. You see, it was I who designed that virus. Unfortunately, I left it to others to carry out the plan. Foolish, I know. Placing trust in others will never be my downfall again.



You're lucky that your “super friends” showed up in time. Sigh. I wonder where they are now? It seems they've gone... missing, haven't they? What a shame.

This would be a good time to tell you, then. My associates and I are... well, taking control of your little town. That's right. You will follow our orders. I hope you don't mind. If you have any complaints, perhaps your “super friends” can come and help you. But, I don't think that will be happening any time soon. I am so sorry.

You can refer to me as Mayor Luthor in all further correspondence. I will be ruling by fear. By anger. By absolute RAGE. If you have any questions, you may speak to the Penguin. He will be assisting me with things for the time being. But I daresay his temper can be worse than mine.



All we ask is complete access to all of your public and private buildings at any time. Really, a small price to pay... to keep your lives.

And for whatever fool robbed that bank – I will find out who you are, and I will take back that object which should have been MINE. DO YOU HEAR? MINE.





Well, that's all for now. I'll be seeing you, Poggopolis.

Transmission over.

-----------------------------------


***MISH MASH NEWS FLASH***

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***MISH MASH NEWS FLASH***

3 AM. August 24th, 2106. Channel 61.





Hello, this is Chuck Norris. I'm here to tell you about an amazing fitness breakthrough called the Total Gym. I began using Total Gym over 20 years ago. I witnessed firsthand what a tremendous difference this machine makes to anyone who wants to build muscle, lose weight, boost cardio endurance, and increase overall fitness. I won't use any other product in my home!

Really, it's an amazing machine. For a few small payments, you'll receive the Total Gym AND my how-to guide containing 30 different exercises you can do at home!

Come with me, and Christine and I will show you how the Total Gym really works. Ready, Christine?

Christine?


Darling?



Oh god... oh god...






Jesus, Christine... no... WHO DID THIS? Did you see NO ONE? It's a [censored] television infomercial set, there has to be at least twenty people here, no one knows what [censored] happened?

Calm down? I am calm. This is Chuck being calm. Goddammit, I AM CALM, I am [censored] CALM Christine, I'm gonna find them. I'm gonna find them, Christine.

...Christine, where's your ring?



They killed you and they took your ring. Jesus. They killed you...

No, you get out of MY WAY. DAMMIT, I'm [censored] CHUCK NORRIS, get the [censored] out of my way! No one gets in my WAY! I'M GOING TO FIND THEM! I'M GOING TO --












Total Gym Direct is experiencing technical difficulties. Please, stand by for an announcement from OxyClean!

***MISH MASH NEWS FLASH***

[shortline99]

***MISH MASH NEWS FLASH***

Dateline, August 24th, 2106.

A boy missing. A family torn apart. A mistaken identity. A maid found hung from the roof of a Poggopolis home.



With the town now under the control of urban terrorists like Lex Luthor, we must look for sources of hope in our lives.

But this story is not a source of hope.

Who is Damien Thorn? Where has he gone?



At 10 AM this morning, a woman was found hung, neck broken, from the roof of the home of noted diplomat Jonathan P. Moneybags, son of Harold Moneybags, known as Mr. Moneybags to most. The home was playing host to the fifth birthday party of little Damien Thorn. Details are shoddy at this time, but all reports indicate that the woman's death was seemingly a suicide.

She was little Damien Thorn's nanny.

What bothers this reporter most about this story is what the woman was reported to have said at her death. We have had numerous witnesses collaborate this, and it makes this reporter very, very nervous.

“It's all for you, Damien,” she said. “It's all for you.”



So who is Damien Thorn? Why has he suddenly gone missing from his family's home? Has he been kidnapped? Has he run away?

And is he really the son of Ambassador Robert Thorn?

More on this... perhaps, another time.



Next up, on Dateline. How to construct your own mobile defense unit out of bubble gum! MacGuyver will show us how.

***MISH MASH NEWS FLASH***

[shortline99]

***MISH MASH NEWS FLASH***

9AM, August 25th, 2106.



Today, on a very special Oprah...

We meet with international singing sensation Britney Spears III, who will talk to us about her inspirational new Christian rock album, “Jesus Does It For Me.”

We will also visit with our friends down on the streets of Poggopolis who talk about finding hope in one of our citiy's darkest hours.

But first: we meet a local father whose newborn son has become quite the talk of Poggopolis lately. It just so happens that he is the cutest baby EVER to be born! What the father does NOT know is that Guinness representatives are backstage waiting to make things official! Ladies and gentleman, here is CARTER!



Before we bring out the father, we have a surprise for everyone in the audience today... that's right, for all of YOU! Look under your seats. Go on...

Do you all have boxes? Yes? Okay, go ahead and open them up...



THAT'S RIGHT! THAT'S RIGHT! You get a baby! You get a baby! YOU get a baby! EVERYBODY GETS A BABY!



EVERYBODY GETS A BABY!

Isn't it AMAZING? Isn't it? CONGRATULATIONS everyone!







Where's Carter? Guys? WHERE'S THE BABY?

Ohmygawwwd.... it's over. Oprah's dream is over.

FIND THAT BABY, DAMMIT!

***MISH MASH NEWS FLASH***

[shortline99]

Yes...

Yes...



Recite the motto. Yes...

I bring neither light nor dark. I bring neither pain nor joy. I attack with power and speed. My enemies are no one, yet everyone is my enemy.

This is my right hand. It is like my left hand. My hands are like myself. Two sides, alike. All is equal in my eyes but equality.

I see no good. I see no evil. I see only indifference.



I make no judgments, but my judgment is absolute.



Fin.



What is it I seek? Vengeance? No. Gratification? Unlikely. Then why do I kill?

In these times, good and evil is the same. It just depends who you ask. Who is a terrorist? Who is a freedom fighter? Who am I to tell the difference?

I kill those who do not choose a side. Theirs is a life without a cause.

This is my cause now.





And this is my mask.

I am a Neutralizer.

[shortline99]

“I say, Holmes, this aeroplane is rather stuffy.”

“Well, Watson, at least we are flying first class. This is how kings live, you know. Try to relax and enjoy yourself.”



“Doesn't the whole matter worry you at all, Holmes? The whole town... held hostage by these... terrorists? What do they expect us to do?”

“They expect us to think, Watson. We must do what they cannot. And that is think.”

“But surely the local police must know something?”

“I assure you, my good Watson, that if the police in Poggopolis were to be trusted we would not be needed for this assignment.”

“Oh, I do hope these things work out all right.”

“Look at me, Watson.”



“Of course things will be all right. Don't be silly. And really, try not to worry. After all, I am the great Sherlock Holmes. But, really, what would I be without the good Dr. Watson by my side?”

“Well, if you put it like that, er, I suppose that things should turn out... for the best.”

“Glad to hear it, my good fellow. Now please, enjoy your champagne. We should be landing shortly.”

“Very well...

...

Erm... Holmes? Why do you suppose that building is on fire down there?”

[shortline99]

August 26th, 2106.

We are rebuilding. Things are moving slowly.

What do those madmen want? They don't seem to want our money, or our possessions, or our love. They just seem to want power, power, power. Absolute control. They don't want to be questioned.

Already I have seen two men beaten in the street for protesting. Why protest? They have done nothing yet on the surface. Mayor Luthor has helped to rebuild the city, even if everything is created in his own image.



I suppose there was that killing of the police chief. But, I mean, that was never really tied to Luthor. I mean, for all we know, that was coincidence. They found him dead, talking on his cell phone. Cell phones kill lots of people, right? Cancer, car accidents. It could've been anything.

Even if he was found in a rowboat on Poggopolis pond...



It isn't good for me to worry about these things. The city is alive again! That's all that matters. Always action in Poggopolis! Even at night, it's like everything's lit up brighter than day.

...

Where is that smoke from?