Brag: Finishing high school at age 39

joyofpoker · #1 09-03-2007, 03:29 PM

Hi guys!

Backstory: I really got hosed my senior year in high school. I flunked two classes which stopped me from getting my diploma. I flunked Home Ec and Typing (we had typing classes on typewriters back in the ol' days before computers). I had these classes the last two periods of the day and me and another guy skipped out on them about 3 times a week telling the old clueless teachers that we were on the golf team and had golf tournaments to travel to and so we had to be let out early for the day.

Well, about a week before graduation the teachers got together behind our back and realized our school didn't even have a golf team and we were just going over to the 7-11 and smoking cigarettes. So, instead of doing the sensible thing like cut us some slack because we were seniors, they went ahead and flunked us and we weren't allowed to graduate.

Anyhoo, I was gonna take makeup classes that summer and finish things up but got caught up in a check cashing scam and had to go to trial during that time. Judge was a total harda$$ and I got 3 years, so no summer school for me.

In prison I had to join a gang or risk getting my sweet a$$ raped against my will. Because my grandma was german I decided to join the german gang in prison and shaved my head and got a tat and stuff. Anyhoooo, ended up getting caught up in their drug smuggling and got a year added to my sentence for that. And ended up having to jump some chinese guy and got 18 months added to my sentence for that. So, I did all the time and the extra time and eventually got the heck out of there.

Over the years, I've taken the GED about 5 times but I believe that testing is a Republican conspiracy to keep conservatives in power, so I never did pass that dumb test. I worked odd jobs until I discovered poker a few years ago and have now been working as a full time online pro, playing mainly the $3 turbo sng's on Pokerstars.

Present Day: As I've gotten older and wiser, I've decided I want to go to med school and maybe become a doctor. Or possibly study marine biology or something. Or possibly run for state senator. And I can't do any of that without a diploma. Plus, my mom and I got in a huge argument and she basically laid it on the line for me that if I don't get my high school diploma I'd have to move out of the house. So, I'm getting my butt in gear and I enrolled in two classes this year at the local high school so I can graduate.

Because they don't offer typing classes anymore, I'm taking a class called Perspectives in Film along with Home Ec, now called Family and Consumer Science! My Film class is pretty cool as we are studying all the Micheal Moore films and he's pretty much a genius. And there's some chubby girls in home ec that I am considering mentoring and being a father figure to.

Anyhoo, cliff notes:

Online poker pro finishing high school after long layoff. Stay in school, kids.