scared of being nice to kids -

[R*R]

Wow, she is not very neighborly. The least she could have done was invited you in for some hotcross buns.

[nubs]

I recently got a new job and moved to a new town. The job started 3 weeks before my lease so my boss offered to let me stay at his place. One of the first evenings I was there I was jumping on his trampoline when the boss's 5 year old son got on and joined me. Not long after that the boy seemed insistent on showing me his new scooby doo underwear. I was terrified the boy would pull down his pants as his father was walking out to the backyard. Luckily I was able to shift the kids attention to something else. A couple days later he was running amock throughout the house and back yard stark naked and my fears were proven unfounded. However in a new city with a new job at the bosses place with his 5 year old kid I was terrified as it happened.

[cambraceres]

I used to be a delivery driver for a while, and once was making a delivery in a quite rural section of SW VA. I stopped at a trailer to deliver a package, and rang the doorbell. A young girl of around 8 opened the door wearing nothing at all and I felt relieved about getting the package delievered but terrified of getting a signature. I asked her if her mommy was home and she smiled and said something n a muffled whisper to her probable sibling, another naked child. In appalachia, it isn't terribly uncommon for prepubescent children to go about naked, a good example of this is found in the photography of Sally Mann, who actually lives arond 5 miles from my home. Because of this culture I wasn't too woried, and the 8 year old seemed to understand when she sent her younger sister to go get her mother. She sood there naked for a few minutes not in any way perceptbly conscious of herself, and then whenher mother arrived she made light conversation about the oppressie hea and ofer me a soda. I tok the soda and agreed with her observations. But outside of the remote country it is just like I undertsand other areas of the country to be.

Cam

[inyourface]

[ QUOTE ]
You think the kid grabbing your leg was bad...
... I left that po-dunk redneck cowtown shortly thereafter.

[/ QUOTE ]

That sounds like an absolute nightmare situation. But you are right how can the father put his children in that position THEN take the moral high ground.

[jeffnc]

[ QUOTE ]
I think this article, and you, are blowing things way out of proportion. I worked as a gymnastics coach all through high school and college and never had a hint of a problem.

[/ QUOTE ]

Well maybe you're just running good.

[jeffnc]

[ QUOTE ]
Granted, I was wearing these:
but come on!

[/ QUOTE ]

ha ha ha ha ha

[jeffnc]

[ QUOTE ]
Okay, you felt offended. Understandable. The mom's reaction is also 100% understandable and fine. DUCY?

[/ QUOTE ]

No. She's part of the problem. It's her responsibility to get to know the people living around her a little better, if she's going to raise children in that environment.

[WMB]

[ QUOTE ]
i agree with people saying that parents are way to paranoid about this stuff. that said, i cant really see myself letting my kids spend time around adult males without my supervision.

[/ QUOTE ]

Terrible attitude, and I don't necessarily blame you. Its the ridiculous media that hypes these stories constantly. The crimes that you hear about everyday against children occured just as frequently 50 years ago, but there wasn't the media there is today to strike fear into everyone. God I'm so glad I grew up 25-30 years ago and had the freedom I did as a child.

[CalledDownLight]

Sorry this is long. I hope some of you read this and give me some responses/answers.

Wow. I never really have this feeling and hope you guys didn't just instill this fear/nervousness in me since I read this thread.

I have been working at an elementary school as a tutor since I was a freshman in college and just started my third year there on Monday. Since I have worked with about 6 different teachers and with the relatively big after school program for 6 hours a week for the entire school year each of the last two years, I know a lot of the people at the school. I'd estimate that I know probably half of the kids in 3rd grade or higher and maybe another 10% of the younger kids and have worked with all of these kids in some fashion over the past two years.

When I walked into the class I was helping today, with a teacher that I helped last year, I knew all but two of the kids and probably about 5 or 6 of them came up and gave me a hug right away. I didn't really feel like I had done anything inappropriate and don't see why this would be looked at in a negative light by anyone really. Also, one of the kids I worked with today walked into the library and saw a tutor that he worked with last year (there are about 40 tutors from my college at this elementary school) and gave her a hug, which seemed completely normal to me. The tutoring program emphasizes building relationships at the school and with the kids although it is in a school environment. There really just isn't a way that an eight year old won't come up to you and say hi if you see him out somewhere after working with him for two hours a week for a year.

Is this the kind of thing that is being looked at as weird and suspicious from the third person perspective or is this an entirely different scenario that I'm presenting since there is already some kind of relationship? Could someone please explain why observers/parents are so concerned about this as it seems very irrational to me? Maybe I'm just naive since I'm 20 years old, but this view that is apparently pretty prevalent seems odd to me. I'm obviously a guy since that seems to be important to this response.


On a completely different note, I often gave several of my teachers hugs in high school at the end of the year and most of the other people in my classes did as well. Is this only applicable in the female student, male teacher situation or does it go both ways?


Also, to those of you who are high school teachers: if there is a fight does everything get thrown out the window or do you still proceed with caution? I'm asking this because my dad is a teacher in a poorish inner city high school with a lot of gang activity and basically says its a free for all in fights where male teachers and coaches essentially throw people against the walls when a fight breaks out. This also goes for fights involving girls.

[keikiwai]

kinda strange thread

up until 2 months ago i lived in a neighborhood with lots of kids, i didn't feel any of this, all the parents knew me and i would sometimes skateboard or play football or whatever in the street w/ the kids w/ the parents elsewhere

there were one or two kids who would come over if they got home before their parents and were locked out, and the parents of one of the high school girls would ask me to go pick her up from school or drop her off sometimes.... i would sometimes drive her and one of her girl friends somewhere

i lived w/ my gf, but i was usually the only one home, since she worked late

most of the kids called me uncle... lol...... hawaiian thing... it got on my nerves at first, but then i thought it was cute

i'm 32...