#61
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Re: Worst beating off experience
[ QUOTE ]
Yo, don't you guys have flys on your pants? Most of these situations could have been avoided if you didn't take off your pants at work/friends house/cousins house/whatev. [/ QUOTE ] Try to act fast and fix things up when theres a period of 5 seconds when you gotta do it to avoid getting caught. Like shut down porn, pull your pants up and close the zipper or buttons, wipe the sweat off your face, try to look cool etc. Harder than you think. |
#62
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Re: Worst beating off experience
[ QUOTE ]
"damn, these porn ads with voice included are pissing me off" [/ QUOTE ] Nice recovery. It looked like you were busted (no pun intended) for a minute there. |
#63
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Re: Worst beating off experience
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ] wait, jackflashdrive, so is the pr0n part of that story real or not? because it's a pretty good story imo. [/ QUOTE ] Eh, no. At first I thought -- worst masturbation experience? Airline lavatories. I didn't think that was BBV4Life worthy so then I just made up something good but didn't have it in me to leave people thinking it was real. I like this ending better anyway. [/ QUOTE ] should've fresh prince rolled instead. [/ QUOTE ] i was completely expecting a prince roll. |
#64
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Re: Worst beating off experience
lol at the ones so far. chopsticks' one is awesome.
ok so I'm in the car with my parents on the way home school, and they want to pass by a furniture place on the way home. So I'm just like, "aight i'll just chill in the car", so they park outside this massive multi story furniture display store and go up to have a look. So I'm there in the car, in the back seat, bored. Then I start remembering how hot my science teacher was that day, which was this hella hot asian chick (i'm sure she wasn't that old either) with glasses. So i decide to have a pull, whilst inside the car parked on the side of a relatively busy street, in broad daylight. So I move as far to the side of the car as possible away from the sidewalk. However, because we're parked on the other side of the road from the furniture store, I just happen to be right up against the window facing this store that's on the other side of the road. Anyway I bust it out and start having an awesome incogneto wank. Everything's going well, like I've got the mad images of me nailing my science teacher while she's wearing a labcoat and DPing herself with a small test tube. Anywya, I look up at the furniture store, and there is my mum looking down from like the second or third story, literally going psycho and waving her arms around. I'm like, 'O snap', so I don't get to finish ldo. So anyway, I just decide to chill there for a bit, and about 5 minutes later my parents get into the car and my mum gives me a really dirty look. Like obv I can't do or say anything do I just stay silent. Anyway, the drive home seemed to take forever. And when we pulled up to a house about seven or eight, And I yelled to the cabby yo, holms smell you later, Looked at my kingdom I was finally there To settle my throne as the prince of bel-air. |
#65
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Re: Worst beating off experience
[ QUOTE ]
Try to imagine a situation where youre standing in front of a bald, 40ish fat guy and looking him into his eyes and cumming at the same time. [/ QUOTE ] is this standard for anyone else? |
#66
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Re: Worst beating off experience
[ QUOTE ]
lol at the ones so far. chopsticks' one is awesome. ok so I'm in the car with my parents on the way home school, and they want to pass by a furniture place on the way home. So I'm just like, "aight i'll just chill in the car", so they park outside this massive multi story furniture display store and go up to have a look. So I'm there in the car, in the back seat, bored. Then I start remembering how hot my science teacher was that day, which was this hella hot asian chick (i'm sure she wasn't that old either) with glasses. So i decide to have a pull, whilst inside the car parked on the side of a relatively busy street, in broad daylight. So I move as far to the side of the car as possible away from the sidewalk. However, because we're parked on the other side of the road from the furniture store, I just happen to be right up against the window facing this store that's on the other side of the road. Anyway I bust it out and start having an awesome incogneto wank. Everything's going well, like I've got the mad images of me nailing my science teacher while she's wearing a labcoat and DPing herself with a small test tube. Anywya, I look up at the furniture store, and there is my mum looking down from like the second or third story, literally going psycho and waving her arms around. I'm like, 'O snap', so I don't get to finish ldo. So anyway, I just decide to chill there for a bit, and about 5 minutes later my parents get into the car and my mum gives me a really dirty look. Like obv I can't do or say anything do I just stay silent. Anyway, the drive home seemed to take forever. And when we pulled up to a house about seven or eight, And I yelled to the cabby yo, holms smell you later, Looked at my kingdom I was finally there To settle my throne as the prince of bel-air. [/ QUOTE ] Good work, imo. |
#67
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Re: Worst beating off experience
btw my story is 100% true, but i just couldn't resist adding the fresh prince roll at the end
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#68
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Re: Worst beating off experience
never by a human but my cat caught me and seemed to like it so now I make him watch every time
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#69
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Re: Worst beating off experience
can this thread be sticky?
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#70
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Re: Worst beating off experience
[ QUOTE ]
can this thread be sticky? [/ QUOTE ] It probably already is for some people. |
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