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  #81  
Old 07-27-2006, 03:59 PM
raze raze is offline
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Default Re: When do you stop picking up the check?

[ QUOTE ]

Obviously on the first date, the guy always pays for the whole thing.


[/ QUOTE ]

Never. This is a big mistake as far as hooking a girl's attraction
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  #82  
Old 07-27-2006, 04:47 PM
CarlSpackler CarlSpackler is offline
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Default Re: When do you stop picking up the check?

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

Obviously on the first date, the guy always pays for the whole thing.


[/ QUOTE ]

Never. This is a big mistake as far as hooking a girl's attraction

[/ QUOTE ]

With regards to this issue, I'm working on the assumption that you and said girl have already hung out and done stuff at least once or twice, including sleeping together, before going on your first "date." At that point, you can take her on your first date, and imo you should pay unless she lost some sort of bet to you or you already had some other agreement.

With regards to future "dates," if you know how to treat a woman and make her happy, she'll offer to pick up the tab at least close to half the time, and if she doesn't, give her hell and cut her off if necessary.

Once you get to the point where you start living together, then I think it's alright to pay the majority of the time you go out if there's some sort of big money disparity, or she's got huge college loans she's trying to pay off, her car just got totaled and she had to buy another one, etc. All things being equal though, you should just alternate who pays every other time or arrange something similar.
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  #83  
Old 07-27-2006, 04:58 PM
Wilco666 Wilco666 is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Netherlands
Posts: 462
Default Re: When do you stop picking up the check?

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

Obviously on the first date, the guy always pays for the whole thing.


[/ QUOTE ]

Never. This is a big mistake as far as hooking a girl's attraction

[/ QUOTE ]

With regards to this issue, I'm working on the assumption that you and said girl have already hung out and done stuff at least once or twice, including sleeping together, before going on your first "date."

[/ QUOTE ]
No. Paying for the whole thing is just plain wrong, strategically. No further assumptions necessary.
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  #84  
Old 07-27-2006, 05:33 PM
private joker private joker is offline
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Default Re: When do you stop picking up the check?

[ QUOTE ]

No. Paying for the whole thing is just plain wrong, strategically. No further assumptions necessary.

[/ QUOTE ]

What are you, Tom Leykis? This is crap. Any guy who doesn't think that he should at least pay for the first date is a cheap, selfish, classless bastard.

Just take the girl out. What are you afraid of? That she might accidentally think you're a good guy?

Your strategy only works on messed up psycho trailer trash who are actually attracted to a-holes. The rest of us would rather date well-adjusted, mature girls.
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  #85  
Old 07-27-2006, 06:04 PM
Aloysius Aloysius is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2004
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Default Re: When do you stop picking up the check?

Jimbo - question regarding all your posts in this thread - really bro?

KB4Z - I think we're similar in that we both somewhat recently got out of long-term relationships... but I'm still feeling my way around the dating thing wrt etiquette.

[ QUOTE ]
if she doesn't at least offer to pay (for something) on the second date, there is no third date

but if I like her, I won't let her contribute until the third or fourth

[/ QUOTE ]

I've been in situations where a girl didn't offer to pay on 2nd date, I thought it was OK at the time.

But I'm with you - she's not paying a dime until the 3rd or 4th if I'm into her.

-Al
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  #86  
Old 07-27-2006, 06:06 PM
PokerFink PokerFink is offline
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Default Re: When do you stop picking up the check?

With my ex-gf I usually paid (probably 4/5 of the time) for both of us, but she would pay when we went to a place of her choosing that she knew I wasn't too fond of, ie a sushi place. She also paid for both movie tickets if she dragged me to a movie I had no interest in seeing. We never discussed this, just sort of happened that way. Worked well.
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  #87  
Old 07-27-2006, 06:11 PM
CardSharpCook CardSharpCook is offline
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Default Re: When do you stop picking up the check?

PJ, I think you should always go out expecting to pay for everything. You're auditioning for the role of provider, right? However, it is perfectly alright to let her pay every once in a while. Personally, her paying is tantamount to her saying, "we're equals," which I like in a relationship. However, I'd never ask her to pay, nor would I try to care all that much. It'd be like finding a great girl who can't stand baseball. I'd be thrilled to be with her, but secretly wish that she liked baseball too.
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  #88  
Old 07-27-2006, 06:21 PM
Scotch78 Scotch78 is offline
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Default Re: When do you stop picking up the check?

If I ask someone to join me for the first time, whether it's a girl on a date or a co-worker for a beer, I am offering to pay. On the other hand, if a girl asks me out first, then I expect her to pay. After the first date, I prefer to take turns paying. I don't keep track though, and with the last girl I was with I'm pretty sure I paid over 60% of the time, even though she made about three times as much as me.

Scott
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  #89  
Old 07-27-2006, 06:32 PM
GotRivered? GotRivered? is offline
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Default Re: When do you stop picking up the check?

I pay 100% of the time when i take my current girl out... Then again I work on wall street and she has about 100k in loans for med school. So i think my situation is different than most
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  #90  
Old 07-27-2006, 06:37 PM
TomCollins TomCollins is offline
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Default Re: When do you stop picking up the check?

I need to stop dating girls who are f'ing broke.

I've never had a girl pay for anything on a date (but I have made significantly more than any girl I've dated).

I went on a few dates with a girl, and it turned out to not work, but we went out once after that, and I paid for her. She said "I'll have to get it next time after I have a job." She moves to another city, gets a well paying job. Flash forward to two weeks ago, I am visiting the city she lives in, we meet up for dinner, check comes, she makes no offer for half, no gesture, nothing. I pick it up. Don't plan to make that trip again.
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