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#52
06-14-2007, 01:47 PM
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Re: spanking (child discipline): a thought and a few questions?
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Is America as a whole not raising their children well due to lack of time with their kids? -Al [/ QUOTE ] I'd blame selfishness rather than time. 
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#53
06-14-2007, 02:16 PM
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Re: spanking (child discipline): a thought and a few questions?
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The more weak-ass posts I read in this thread, the more confidence I have in that I am going to be an awesome dad. [/ QUOTE ] other people being bad parents will not make you a better one. it is not graded on a curve. the more i know (which isn't that much) is that you MUST be motivated, unselfish, dedicated, thoughtful, and above all loving to your kid/kids and you will be an awesome dad. oh and you don't get days off from this it is a life time commitment that requires consistency. i truly hope you are awesome, but others shortcomings sure as hell won't help your cause. [img]/images/graemlins/ooo.gif[/img] J.
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#55
06-14-2007, 03:19 PM
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Re: spanking (child discipline): a thought and a few questions?
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] Is America as a whole not raising their children well due to lack of time with their kids? -Al [/ QUOTE ] I'd blame selfishness rather than time. [/ QUOTE ] So I guess you believe parents in general are getting increasingly more selfish? I'm not sure I follow. Oh I am not a parent, just curious as many of my peers are starting to have kids. -Al
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#56
06-14-2007, 03:35 PM
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Re: spanking (child discipline): a thought and a few questions?
Two kids here and I've never spanked them. Although it's been close when I've been super angry. I use time-outs and I've found them to be very effective, especially for my little boy. Certainly more effective than yelling and screaming.
The reason I haven't spanked them is I don't think I'm being a good role model. Essentially I'd be deomnstrating that it is ok to resolve problems with physical violence. It makes no sense to me to punish a child for biting by spanking them. What is the kid supposed to make of that? That biting another kid is wrong, you should hit them instead? I know that sounds a bit abstract, but in simple terms, kids copy what their parents do. I'm not having a go at anyone. I wouldn't ban other parents from doing it, it's just that personally I couldn't integrate it into my aims as a parent.
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#57
06-14-2007, 04:38 PM
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Re: spanking (child discipline): a thought and a few questions?
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I have never spanked my 5-year-old daughter, but I would if the situation necessitated it. [/ QUOTE ] What situation would necessitate it? That seems to me to be the question parents have to ask themselves. I didn't spank FWIW. Limits and structure are the keys to raising kids. The "hays in the barn" after about 5 years of age IMO again FWIW. [ QUOTE ] The main issue I see is that you usually spank when you're mad, and I don't like to show hitting as an appropriate response. [/ QUOTE ] Yep.
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#58
06-14-2007, 04:52 PM
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Re: spanking (child discipline): a thought and a few questions?
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ] Is America as a whole not raising their children well due to lack of time with their kids? -Al [/ QUOTE ] I'd blame selfishness rather than time. [/ QUOTE ] So I guess you believe parents in general are getting increasingly more selfish? I'm not sure I follow. Oh I am not a parent, just curious as many of my peers are starting to have kids. -Al [/ QUOTE ] Wihtout a doubt. I believe that the baby-boomers were and continue to be the most selfish generation in our country's history. I'm glad I see their children behaving a bit differently in many aspects especially parenting, but they are still taking cues from that generation in "involvement". I'm sure I'll be riddled with anecdotes about the tremendous parenting skills of "my mom and dad" from that generation, but they spent less time with their children and more time involved in their children's lives. They didn't play catch so much as make sure that the coach gave the kid playing time. They didn't help the the kid practice piano as much as remind the piano teacher how much they were paying them. That generation spent a ton of time undermining the authority figures in their children's lives under the guise of "protecting" them. In reality, they ignored the kids themselves but controlled the kid's life, and made the kids think that they were important to the world by intervening and rescuing them at every turn, including and up through college. It's pretty obvious that kids that are taught to be so self-important will become extremely difficult to parent. It goes farther though - they become difficult to teach, coach and manage.
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#59
06-14-2007, 05:18 PM
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Re: spanking (child discipline): a thought and a few questions?
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I think spanking is bad, and spanking when you're mad is unquestionably bad. All I can see is that speaking teaches your child that you think hitting/violence is a good way to deal with things sometimes. [/ QUOTE ] Children at times need to understand that there are some hard and fast rules that they may not ever break. A spank is a fine way to articulate this message. I therefore think your premise is wrong. Even if your premise were right, I'd still disagree. Violence certainly is an effective way of dealing with certain limited situations.
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#60
06-14-2007, 05:21 PM
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Re: spanking (child discipline): a thought and a few questions?
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The more weak-ass posts I read in this thread, the more confidence I have in that I am going to be an awesome dad. [/ QUOTE ] In that case, I recommend that you and your kids move into a crack house, amongst a group of seriously weak-ass dads. That'll make you feel so much better about your parenting skills!
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