How Self-Mutilation has made me a better lover . . .

[SuitedSixes]

This may turn out to be a good thread, or it may suck anyway . . .

As my title reads, I am a Sexual Tyrannosaurus. I have never had a woman complain about my abilities in the sack. I was the first person to ever give my (now ex) wife orgasms. My current girlfriend routinely "outscores" me 3 to 1 a night.

It got me wondering what my secret is. I think that much like the Pai Dong people:



I have systematically transformed my body into a a shape that is not natural. This abnormality however, seems to be more pleasing to the women I sleep with. You see I discovered masturbation at about the age of 8. But rather than the typical stroking motion that seems to be the norm, I found pleasure in pressing my penis against my abdomen and rubbing it in a clock-wise circle. Thus, I do not "jerk it" or "whack it" but rather "run one out."

As a result, over years and years of this, my erect penis now sticks straight up with less than a cm of space between my abdomen. (From all the porn I've seen, this isn't standard). This change causes my penis to be in constant contact with the woman's G-spot throughout love-making creating greater pleasure for her.

Am I on to something here?