Ask Howard about Oriental Massage Parlors

[Los Feliz Slim]

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Are all Asian Massage Parlors the same way? Eg, if you walked into an "Asian Massage Parlor" in a random city cold with no read or information, would you expect to get laid?

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Yes. If the sign says 'Oriental' or 'Asian' Massage and ESPECIALLY 'Accupressure' that's the place you will get laid.


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I want to go back to this, perhaps you or someone else can clarify. Every single Asian massage parlor is for sexytime? I only ask because these things are all over the place in LA, and I often think to myself "can there really be that many bordellos around here?" If they're all for sex, that's amazing, simply amazing.

[RayPowers]

Howard, does T-Pup give good Asian Massage Parlor suggestions?

Ray

[dozer]

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In a non-Asian place (one of the best in NYC at the time) I paid $800 for 2 hours with 2 girls that I'd been seeing seperately because one of them told me that she and the other one were 'together'. They did each other while I watched and it was no act. What a sight. Then I got to join in. What a time. I'd like to that one again.

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Trip report, pls

[mntbikr15]

LOL


"As a young business professional (70's) I was asked to entertain a contingent of
Japanese executives for an eveing in San Francisco. Wives were included so I
felt pretty safe as I had heard some sick stories about previous trips without
the wives. So after a nice Italian dinner, many bottles of wine and a concerto,
the head Jap says "Dan-san, we would like to see naked American Women now." So
I throw the limo driver a $20 and we head up to Mitchell brothers Theatre. After
a stage show and a few lap dances we end up in a room with a woman in a plexi
glass box. Slip money through the slot and she will do tricks for you. After the
woman did a little dildo teaser the head Jap says to me "Dan-san she use other
hole!" So I asked the friendly lady how much for the third recepticle to which
she replied "You can't afford it Buddy." So I pointed to the Japs and said they
could so how much. '$500" Which seemed like a fair price given that the dildo in
question was the size of my arm. Next thing I know the very exicted Japs handed
me close to $1,000 in $20 bills that I had to stuff through this little slot.
The kind lady then lubed up Mr Armstrong and tickled her colon until I fit the
last $20 through. All the time the Japs were yelling BONZI and their wives
looked on with absolutely no emotion whatsoever."

[Brocktoon]

Awesome story.

[jba]

"BONZI"


hahahahhaahaha

[Kintamayama]

Just curious as to why these places are not subjected to police busts?

[Howard Beale]

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How clean are these places? Do they go to great length to keep it clean or are they pretty sloppy...like the dildo from the other story.

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Generally speaking they are decent. The place I go to in Phoenix is very clean. The one down the street from the Bike is ok but it's a bit run down (if it's still there).

Years ago (in NYC) the places were VERY nice until the cops started busting them so often. They could count on being in the same location for ~6 months or so and they put some money into them. After that they knew they might only last a month or so and then they became dumpier. I don't know what they're like now.

The 'dildo place' was VERY nice and, despite being a real shockeroo at the time, actually reflects their preparedness to accomodate the customers. Think about it. The girl was willing to perform the 'service' and she said they 'cleaned them in between.' That can't be fun.

[Howard Beale]

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So the odds of walking into a random place that says "Asian" and "massage" anywhere on the sign in NYC and it NOT being a brothel are <1%?

I can only imagine the embarassment if you went into one of these places, it turned out to be 100% on the level, and once you got into the room you and girl weren't on the same page. I couldn't bear it.

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Get a copy of the Voice or Screw. Find the ads, call the place to find out where they are and go. There will be NO misunderstanding.

[By-Tor]

Oddly enough, I have never worked up the courage to go into a parlor and have always opted for the AAMP's.

I think this would be different in the LA or NY area since I probably would feel safer in a actualy parlor rather then somebody's apartment.

But in the Bay Area, AAMP's are #1.









I go to one everynight now....but I call it home [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]