Never Trust Anyone

[DrewDevil]

Thread summary (not written by me):

Brandi: Yo, I’m Brandi and Captain Tom is a dick. He took innocent little me and told me he would coach me. I gave him my 12k bankroll and all I got in return was a penis against my back when he wanted to huggle me. I never expected such crassness and was shocked, shocked I tell ya, and crying on the bathroom floor the rest of the night. He never returned my money (though I continued to travel with him). He also started bringing along a young girl he called his niece/daughter, Amanda. The outrage! Captain Tom is married. Oh yea, I have $43 and had to eat microwave Thanksgiving and had my Beemer repoed. I hope I don’t become disillusioned by this.


Commenters: What the [censored]? You gave him your bankroll? You stayed with him after the POB incident.


Commenters: You are skank. You knew the score and should just shut it cuz the playa got played.


Commenters: Commenters calling her a skank are [censored] and should be banned.


Commenters: Commenters defending her are [censored] cuz all women are looking for is cold hard cash and of course they will trade sex for it. If Captain only got POB action, he got ripped yo.


Commeters: Oh yea, she’s an ex-stripper.


Brandi: Am not. That ‘rescued me from the pole’ comment on my blog was about me thinking about stripping.


Shaniac: I met this girl at the table, she is obnoxious. There is likely more to the story.


Brandi: I don’t even know you.


Shaniac: You smoked my weed bitch.


Commenters: ROTFLMAO


Commenters: Man, you are all a bunch of sexist pigs. Pig-[censored] men.


Commenters: Yo, she also stole 30k from Newhouse (poker pro).


Commenters: Yo, sexist pigs, pig [censored] men making up [censored].


Brandi: I didn’t take [censored] from Newhouse. He let me play online with his money, told me what to do, and I did it. Oh, btw he is a sissy girl that cries at night after he loses money and jacks off while looking at me. He’s to greasy for me to [censored].


Commenters: ROTFLMAO


Geek Commenters: Post the hand histories from the poker site where she played so we can see them--directed to Newhouse.


Newhouse: Yo, I wasn’t even there. She played on my account in the hotel room in LA while I got my ass pounded at Commerce (casino). I came back upstairs and she said she was up and had changed the password to my account. Said she wanted it to be a surprise. I got on and OMG she lost 30k. She freaked on me major, locked herself in the bathroom, cut her wrists and wrote “I want to fly” in blood on the wall. BTW, on the way back to Vegas, she offered to give me butt sex for a buyin to a 10k satellite. I bought her into the tourney.


Commenters: ROTFLMAO


One commenter makes an avatar of blood on the wall with the line “I want to fly.”


Commenters: Mea culpa, she is a skanky whore.


Commenters: You sure Captain Tom wasn’t a Rear Admiral?


Brandi: Newhouse cries like a girl. And I never had buttsex or any sex with him. He kept wanking himself off and I felt sorr for him so I gave him a handjob.


Enter video of other Poker Pro with Brandi dressed as a Christmas Elf: If I’m dead in 3 days it was Captain Tom.


Brandi: Other Poker Pro never helped me. Yo, when I found out he wasn’t, I had a panic attack at the Bellagio, yo. And some dick stole my passport.


Dick who allegedly stole her passport: Bitch is whacked. Whacked!!


Commenters: Brandi, I’ll buy you into a tourney babe.


Commenter: Nude pictures of Brandi surface and links are posted.


Commenters: Long discussion about whether the titties are real or fake.


Commenter: Posts HH from Newhouse that all the geeks analyze instead of the nudey pics.


Commenters: Songs and Movie scripts appear.


Brandi: Newhouse is broke because he lost and still owes taxes.


Commenters: (Geeks) Tax law, losses are deductible beatch. Pointless discussion ensues on tax law.


Commenters: Where is Captian Tom?


Captain Tom impersonator: Brandi, retract what you said or I will post the whole story, honey.


Commenters: OMG, OMG, OMG it’s Captain Tom.


Moderators: We banned the Captain Tom impersonator.


Brandi: I only have $43.


Commenters: I’ll buy you into a tourney sweetie.


Pokerator: Poker site comes forward with video of Brandi and personal website is discovered where she talks about making her first 2 million, but what really excites her is the 3rd million cuz she can buy a boat and sail.


Commenters: I want to sail.


Commenters: Links to video of Brandi doing a fire dance and exposing herself to the camera are provided.


Commenters: ROTFLMAO.


Thread peters out.

[tomsum]

so can someone post a link to these videos i keep reading about? 4600 posts is a lot to go through again and i did't catch them the first time.

[iron81]

Forgot Sup Bro, but otherwise pretty good.

[sublime]

anybody have the "2+2 serious business" screenshot? with sklansky and the owl etc? somebody has it as an avatar and i would like to have it normal sized as its hilarious.

[iron81]

Spent 10 seconds googling. I think it was first introducuced to 2+2 in my forum by ShakeZula.

[Fishmonger]

[ QUOTE ]
anybody have the "2+2 serious business" screenshot? with sklansky and the owl etc? somebody has it as an avatar and i would like to have it normal sized as its hilarious.

[/ QUOTE ]

[sublime]

LOLOLLOLOLL thanks sir!

i love how DS is chcking out the owls ass

[Five-Star]

Excellent summary, now can this thread [censored] die?

[Emsterdad]

WOW what a long post, all i have to say is that if even a single line of this post is true then "captain Tom" is a discusting old retard.

Where i come from they practised the concept of "attestupa" in the dark ages and just ran old horny bastards off a cliff.. maybe somehing to ponder for the future.

ALL respect for "The Captain" down the drain, hope he gets assaulted at his next tournamnent if this post has any reality-based text.

[nath]

[ QUOTE ]
WOW what a long post, all i have to say is that if even a single line of this post is true then "captain Tom" is a discusting old retard.

Where i come from they practised the concept of "attestupa" in the dark ages and just ran old horny bastards off a cliff.. maybe somehing to ponder for the future.

ALL respect for "The Captain" down the drain, hope he gets assaulted at his next tournamnent if this post has any reality-based text.

[/ QUOTE ]
Um, you may want to actually read the rest of the thread.