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#31
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My ex-girlfriend once rolled over and slapped me hard in the chest and then immediately rolled back while still half-asleep. It stung, and I was shocked and bewildered. About ten seconds later she rolled back over, nuzzled into me and mumbled, "I'm sorry, I thought you were dream-John."
Apparently she was having a dream, and I was in it and I did something bad and she wanted to punch me, so she slapped the actual me, who hadn't done anything. The way she rolled over and apologized, half-asleep, however, was so f--king cute that I didn't even get mad. I did, however, laugh my ass off once the sting subsided. |
#32
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My ex-girlfriend once rolled over started giving me a BJ while still half-asleep. About ten seconds later she rolled back over and mumbled, "I'm sorry, I thought you were John."
My name isn't John, but her ex-boyfriend's is. BBV? |
#33
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[ QUOTE ]
My ex-girlfriend once rolled over started giving me a BJ while still half-asleep. About ten seconds later she rolled back over and mumbled, "I'm sorry, I thought you were John." My name isn't John, but her ex-boyfriend's is. BBV? [/ QUOTE ] Brag: Getting [censored] while in sleep. Beat: Her aim was off. Variance: She apologized for her aim being off. This morning my girlfriend woke me up asking where something was. Half asleep I responded: "Well you see, the thing about that is. . . RUN!!! *loud exaggerated snoring noises*" Not really sure what the hell I was dreaming about. |
#34
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Some very good suggestions so far. I'm not concerned that this will be my alibi, but rather hers. "See, I'm a victim of domestic abuse, I feared for my life, I had to kill him" Seriously though- if something like this happens again who do I see? [/ QUOTE ] Tell your doctor to hook you up with a sleep therapist. |
#35
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Seperate bedrooms. Seriously.
It works great for couples where one of them snores lots, or where one has violent nightmares. At least you'll both get a good night's sleep, and not have to worry about whether you will kill your girl in your sleep. She will sleep easier too. PS. Don't play the song "The Flag - Barenaked Ladies" for next little while. |
#36
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I've done similar stuff to the GF before. No choking, but an attemped swing once and several kicks into the wall (I sleep on the outside).
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#37
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[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] My ex-girlfriend once rolled over started giving me a BJ while still half-asleep. About ten seconds later she rolled back over and mumbled, "I'm sorry, I thought you were John." My name isn't John, but her ex-boyfriend's is. BBV? [/ QUOTE ] Brag: Getting [censored] while in sleep. Variance: Her aim was off. Beat: She stopped after she realized her aim was off. [/ QUOTE ] FYP |
#38
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ouch...bad beat..
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#39
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Yeah...thats just weird...
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#40
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You have a parasomnia. This is a medical condition. Go see a sleep specialist.
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