My life is over.

[iggymcfly]

Are you sure the woman's really the main problem here? I mean if she distracts you, just get an iPod or something so you don't have to hear her.

I don't know if you want to share this, but I think it might be helpful to know your BR before this started, where it's at now, and how much you were making on average before, so we know just how big of a downswing this is. I think the poker problem is probably mainly a poker problem that's being amplified by other problems in your life.

I do think taking a few days off from poker is probably a good idea though. Sometimes, it just takes looking at the game with a fresh mindset. Really though, unless the woman's spending a substantial portion of your monthly income, I think she's not the main problem. Focusing and adjusting your game is probably the real answer here.

[Borknagar]

hi Depguy,

Poker is the only way for you to make money right? Think you can do it in 20/30 years from now? Doesn't look like you've got anything left in the bank for your 'pension'. you probably have enough to think about for the short term, but dont neglect the long term

[Tarheel]

Depguy -

First off, all of us here wish you the best. Feel free to PM me if you ever need to.

Now, everything that you said in your original post, you need to say to your girlfriend. If you can't tell her what is going on in your life and what's important and necessary for you, then she's probably not a very good companion for you.

I'm not saying that you need to share every last detail about everything with each other, but at the minimum she needs to understand the pressing need for change in your situation for these two reasons:

A) Your own personal happiness
B) Your financial security as a couple


I know you said that you had tried to explain to her before, but my feeling is that you were very vague or unconvincing in the explanation of the signifigance of the conversation. The conversation needs to entail more than "I need privacy when i am playing poker." She needs to understand why. If you were to print your post out and hand it to her to read, it would hit her fairly hard. You need to be able to convey that same actuality to her when you are talking to her.


There are plenty of self-help books available that deal with effectively communication and communication techniques. Hit up the library and check a few out. Nobody can ever be too strong of a communicator, so brushing up on your skills is always a good idea.

- Tarheel

[pipedreamz]

update?

[Turn Prophet]

Sounds to me like you already know the solution.

You either have to lose the girl or find another, more steady source of income.

Now choose.

[TopCornerPoker]

Why don't you set up a personal office where you can sit down and play poker undisturbed.

Have a door you can close and shut out everything else going on in your house.

I don't get this either. You don';t have enough money saved up after playing years of poker to live for 3 months? Haven't you ever taken breaks from poker before?

[canada_dry]

[ QUOTE ]
Poker has been your only source of income for the last ten years and 3 losing months have crippled you? What limits were you playing and what are you playing now?

[/ QUOTE ]

I was thinking the same thing. How is that you can find yourself in such a predicament so quickly. Ten years of beating the game (a) tells me you are a solid player (b) you must have built some kind of bankroll (c) you have bankroll management skills


So how does three months of losing but you on the verge of bankruptcy? And even with a bothersome woman around, how does that explain playing so badly? I mean I can still play and have my girlfriend around. Of course, I'd only be playing 1 or 2 tables but it can be done....

Something ain't right here..

[TimWillTell]

I thought this was a great reed.
I wouldn't mind reading a book that was like ur post.

Best of luck though with ur problems!

[DrJen]

GET couples counseling. Seriously. You state that you stil love this woman. Good. But your relationship is seriously off-kilter, and you don't know why. There seems to be a lot of assumption on the board that your partner is a gold-digger. However, there are many other explanations -- for example, that she resents that you are paying more attention to your computer than to her. The 20 conversations the 2 of you have had haven't worked -- it's time to try a different approach,

[Dan BRIGHT]

If I were you, I'd seriously consider moving up in stakes