Stupid things I thought when I was a kid.

[evagaba]

I have seen a couple of these already, but here goes.

- I thought you just stuck it in and that was sex. I told the second ever girl I did it with (like 13 or so) "I like it when we move".

- I thought there was a god and if you sinned you faced a horid life of eternal damnation. I think college cleared my head.

[Yads]

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I thought the vagina was actually called the Regina (a Canadian city). I thought it was funny that my dad had to go there for business, and that anyone would live in a city called that.

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I think almost everybody who grew up in Canada had a Regina/Vagina association.

[EscapePlan9]

Peanut butter jelly sandwiches tasted better with jelly on top, and cut diagonally. 10

Circumsized penises were more natural than uncircumsized ones. 21

Pharmacy stores were bad because they sold drugs. 12 (thanks DARE, you taught me a lot!)

It's not appropriate to cheer when Jim Kelly or other football players get injured. 10

During meals sometimes my dad would take some of my food and say it's "Dad tax". I honestly thought it was a real tax. 10

I thought there was a god. Just kidding suckers! I used to attend Sunday School (parents made me) and listen to lessons on how "God is sitting in this chair, and God is everywhere all around you, but you can't see him" and thinking it's just another fairy tale story. It hasn't changed much for me.

Cashiers must make a lot of money. When we give them money, it's theirs to keep. 13

It's the law that parents must work. 13

Breakfast, lunch, and dinner didn't cost money, but buying snacks did. 10

Although I heard about sex, I never really knew what it entailed until I found porn on the internet. I quickly learned about all the forms of sex and what everything looks like. 13 (thanks porn!)

[KurtSF]

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1. I thought colleges taught you something worth the thousands of dollars you were spending.


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Finally found one in this thread that I believed when I was little. Actually going to college cured me of this belief.

Also, until I was about 12 I thought that everyone goes to Junior High, then High School, then College, and then only some people go on to Graduate School. That's what happens when you grow up with two PhDs for parents.

Oh, and I thought kids weren't allowed to have coffee just like they weren't allowed to have alcohol - its illegal! Figured that out around 7 or 8.

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At age 4 i open the fridge, i then proudly tell my mother i know how to spell milk. P-E-T milk.

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This one is not so much something I used to believe, but its a funny anecdote that I think exemplifies what a stubborn [censored] I am.

When I was about 2 I open up the fridge and take out the apple juice. The brand name is "IO Apple Juice". I say to my mom "I-O spells 'no'." She of course corrects me, "No, N-O spells 'no'." I take it in, look back at the apple juice, "Oh," I tell her, "they spelled 'no' wrong."

I'm still not sure I've been fully disabused of the notion that I'm always right.

[2218]

When I was 4 or 5, I thought dogs and cats were the males and females (respectively) of the same species.

[IlliniLou]

people were buried right where they died and thought to myself why do people keep going to cemeteries if there is such a good chance that you could die there?

[RunyonAve]

I thought that if i drank water while i was pissing i would continue to pee until i stopped drinking.

[gusmahler]

When my mom fried eggs, she'd put the eggs in a pan. A few seconds later, she'd add some salt, then the whites of the eggs would turn white. I used to think that it was the salt that turned the eggs white.

[RustedCorpse]

That there was an old guy up in the sky in control of everything watching me masturbate. -20