Favorite insults when monkeytilt takes over?

Or..


When you bust out forever in this game, and you will, please remember this hand and the fact that I personally extended your Poker life by at least 10 minutes.

[LionelHutz00]

At least my mother isn't a whore.

[tnenonen13]

someone came up with a rather creative line when I busted him from a 3$ single table Sit&go: "I checked you from thepokerdb, and you both are nobodies."
Hilarious..

[BingoChimp]

"Congratulations! You win at monkey bingo"

and...

"I bet all your friends are sock puppets aren't they?"

I know, a bit weird but the image that pops into my head just makes me laugh and forget about how bad any beat is.

[mug77]

I once had a super bad beat where early in a $11 regular (2500 or so people) tourney on PP. I had about 12000 in chips real early. This other guy at my table had about 10,000 in chips. Blinds are only 50-100. He raised to 700, I had AA so I made it 2,000 he insta pushes all in so of course I call. He Has AQ. Flop came J-10 something. Turn = no help. River = King. I just said, "Damn I can't believe I just got outplayed for almost all my chips. I should have laid that down, what was I thinking." His response. "You will lose those chips everytime messing with me."

[Grey]

I sometimes ask them not to breed, and offer to play for their vasectomies. Depending on their response, we can talk about how they work at McDonalds, or what kind of special keyboard they have that fits monkey fingers.

[villafan]

I usually dont say anything, but once or twice a month I snap and say something like this (im not sure its the exact wording, but you will get it..):

"djf odisfjEFS< WPEOIFJWEF pouewffeoji damn trips on flop pwfojifweopjkw! dfheowhf jhpofcwihsvdpæ

nh"



When I suckout really bad against a table coach/whiner/idiot/moron/[censored], I say: SUCKOUT!!!! HAHHAHAAHAHAHAH

If the same table coach/whiner/idiot/moron/[censored] later go bust, I'll say; "please come back when you get your next welfare check"

[SmackinYaUp]

Not an insult but after a bad beat..

"So, how long have you worked here?"

[miajag]

[ QUOTE ]
"I hope your children die on Christmas morning."

[/ QUOTE ]

[PocketElevens]

I love telling someone who made an idiot call preflop, flop, and turn to catch a mirical river "NH".

Some times the person who gets sucked out on goes completely insane "ARE YOU F_ING KIDDING ME!!! THAT WAS RETARDED!!! BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH... CALLED A RE-RAISE COLD PREFLOP WITH 62o!!! BLAH BLAH BLAH..."

Then I dont say another word.

It still makes me laugh every time it works. I play low limits so it works alot.

I believe this is +EV because A) you compliment the fish for terrible play B) You sometimes get the player with the premium hand on tilt.