Telling people they need to lose weight (or other unpleasant things).

[PartyGirlUK]

Firstly, one of my best friends has always been deeply obese. Id guess he is 6 foot 1 and 400lbs. He's one of the nicest guys you could wish to meet and has a lot going for him. He should be able to have an amazing and and full life, and he actually does lead a pretty good life as it is, but he cant play sports, and its hard to see him living past 40 as it goes. We've never talked about his size, but he knows he is obese and Im sure he wants to lose weight and knows the consequences.

Subject number two is my brother. I havent actually seen him for 15 months, but my parents just told me he's put a lot of weight on and they seemed genuinely upset about it. He is 5 '11 and it sounds like he is 260lbs or so. Apparently when they last saw him he was having 3 or 4 servings from the buffets, but they didnt say anything. He is single and wants to get married soon. He is not sporty but I want him to be healthy.

What is the best way to approach this? I dont want to upset either, but sometimes tough love is needed and someone has to tell them how it is.

Thanks,

D