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#22
06-25-2007, 06:45 PM
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Re: Interested in Girl at Work
One of the comments made that other people senior to you can do a lot of fantasizing about the girls in the office is dead on. In law offices I worked in, guys called the women who worked for them "my girls" and loved getting ego-stroked by them, fussed over and touched etc. The women went along with it almost universally, some to protect their jobs, some to gold-dig probably, some probably already involved with them.
I found harassment suits more common than you'd think, and guys acting very possessive over the girls who worked under them. So keep in mind that it's not just whether the girl likes you. It's also about whether the other, jealous older guys -- you know, the ones with wives who never see them because they work so much, or only see them when it's late and they're pissed off and tired and probably don't f*ck them unless they feel they have to, the ones with older unattractive wives -- feel that you're violating their territory. Because if you are, they can come up with any baloney they want about how it's not in the office's best interest, etc. But really it's often just that the guy is jealous and sees you as invading his turf. If you want to make partner one day, do you want one of these guys jealous of you and the attention you're getting, or thinking he's still as young and virile as ever, and desirable to all the girls of his devoted flock, even over the younger, fitter men? Believe it, people in offices can be endlessly petty and infantile. Law offices too, very much so. 
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#23
06-25-2007, 06:47 PM
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Re: Interested in Girl at Work
[ QUOTE ]
One of the comments made that other people senior to you can do a lot of fantasizing about the girls in the office is dead on. In law offices I worked on, guys called the women who worked for them "my girls" and loved getting ego-stroked by them, fussed over and touched etc. The women went along with it almost universally, some to protect their jobs, some to gold-dig probably, some probably already involved with them. I found harassment suits more common than you'd think, and guys acting very possessive over the girls who worked under them. So keep in mind that it's not just whether the girl likes you. It's also about whether the other, jealous older guys -- you know, the ones with wives who never seem them because they work so much, or only see them when it's late and they're pissed off and tired and probably don't f*ck them unless they feel they have to, the ones with older unattractive wives -- feel that you're violating their territory. Because if you are, they can come up with any baloney they want about how it's not in the office's best interest, etc. But really it's often just that the guy is jealous and sees you as invading his turf. If you want to make partner one day, do you want one of these guys jealous of you and the attention you're getting, or thinking he's still as young and virile as ever, and desirable to all the girls of his devoted flock, even over the younger, fitter men? Believe it, people in offices can be endlessly petty and infantile. Law offices too, very much so. [/ QUOTE ] Totally agree with this too. Apart from the legitimate reasons for keeping associates from sleeping with summers, you also have the problem of horny, jealous old partners who'll resent the fact that you're getting what they'd like to have. Bad mojo all around.
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#25
06-25-2007, 06:58 PM
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Re: Interested in Girl at Work
In a word, no. You're still on somewhat of a probationary status yourself. Also, you really want to be dating another lawyer? Really?
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#26
06-26-2007, 12:51 AM
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Re: Interested in Girl at Work
Thanks everybody for your advice. It pretty much mirrored my thinking on the issue. If I didn't work with this girl, I think it might be worth pursuing. However, based on all the factors, I might as well lay back. If the situation changes or something interesting presents itself, then my thinking might change. I hate completely closing the door, but it's certainly not going to be kept open by me. If there are any new interesting developments, I will keep you guys posted and promptly post a trip report with pics (if available).
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#27
06-26-2007, 12:54 AM
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Re: Interested in Girl at Work
[ QUOTE ]
Thanks everybody for your advice. It pretty much mirrored my thinking on the issue. If I didn't work with this girl, I think it might be worth pursuing. However, based on all the factors, I might as well lay back. If the situation changes or something interesting presents itself, then my thinking might change. I hate completely closing the door, but it's certainly not going to be kept open by me. If there are any new interesting developments, I will keep you guys posted and promptly post a trip report with pics (if available). [/ QUOTE ] That's what you need - to be disbarred for webcamming sex with a fellow lawyer and posting it on the internets. [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]
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#28
06-26-2007, 01:13 AM
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Re: Interested in Girl at Work
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] Thanks everybody for your advice. It pretty much mirrored my thinking on the issue. If I didn't work with this girl, I think it might be worth pursuing. However, based on all the factors, I might as well lay back. If the situation changes or something interesting presents itself, then my thinking might change. I hate completely closing the door, but it's certainly not going to be kept open by me. If there are any new interesting developments, I will keep you guys posted and promptly post a trip report with pics (if available). [/ QUOTE ] That's what you need - to be disbarred for webcamming sex with a fellow lawyer and posting it on the internets. [img]/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [/ QUOTE ] I wasn't talking action shots, but now that you mention it... Obviously, my 2+2 rep is more important than my legal career or keeping anything that happens discrete.
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#29
06-26-2007, 01:23 AM
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Re: Interested in Girl at Work
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] but its probably not worth the trouble actively pursuing this chick. [/ QUOTE ] I appreciate your advice, and I can't see myself doing anything unless all signals were a go and it could happen discretely. From all indications this girl is likely to drink more/let her guard down in a setting outside of a work happy hour. My gut feeling is that if something is going to happen, it will, and there is no reason to force anything. I've dropped the ball a few times on setting something up outside of work when she's made a comment that "I go to X all the time, you should go" or "oh, really? we should go there sometime." FWIW, those signals have died down over the last week. [/ QUOTE ] Yeah no kidding, that's because she wanted you to make a move like last month.
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#30
06-26-2007, 02:17 AM
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Re: Interested in Girl at Work
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] [ QUOTE ] but its probably not worth the trouble actively pursuing this chick. [/ QUOTE ] I appreciate your advice, and I can't see myself doing anything unless all signals were a go and it could happen discretely. From all indications this girl is likely to drink more/let her guard down in a setting outside of a work happy hour. My gut feeling is that if something is going to happen, it will, and there is no reason to force anything. I've dropped the ball a few times on setting something up outside of work when she's made a comment that "I go to X all the time, you should go" or "oh, really? we should go there sometime." FWIW, those signals have died down over the last week. [/ QUOTE ] Yeah no kidding, that's because she wanted you to make a move like last month. [/ QUOTE ] Maybe or maybe I was just hoping she did and reading too much into things. Either way, it's not gonna happen unless I get even clearer signals that it's a go and nobody will find out.
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