OOT, introduce me

[2/325Falcon]

Make sure he calls you a dirty, nasty leg.

Favorite song is the key category. You need some horrible piece of crap that will stick in people's heads. Barbie Girl?

Favorite color - Puce so you can be known as Puce Bigalow: Male Gigolo

[shaftman11]

favorite color: pink taco

[2/325Falcon]

Bump. Tell us your answers.

[d10]

OK the party was tonight. Favorite color was "fuschia or any kind of pastel color, they are nice and relaxing and make me feel good", hobbies included knitting, flying to the moon, harry potter larping and a few others, favorite song couldn't decide between Fergilcious or My Humps so I put both (thx 2/325 for inspiring the idea), special abilities I kept all female related, and I would put $1M on black.

It should have been good but the guy introducing me was super lame, and embarassed to mention half the stuff. He blew through my hobbies so quick I couldn't even hear him, and didn't know what LARPing was so he just said "something about harry potter", never heard of Fergilicious so he was just like "wtf is this?", skipped all of my special abilities, and said if I had $1M I would put it all back, which nobody understood, probably because it makes no [censored] sense. At least he got my favorite color right but he said it in such a humorless way I don't think people knew whether to laugh or if he was serious. It was pretty embarassing, and not in the way it was supposed to be.

I should have gone with eviljeff's idea, because I also found out tonight that on Monday I'm going to need to have a little talk with my commander about a poker night I went to with one of my buddies at work. He's going through a divorce and had a female friend over for 100% platonic activities and I'm in trouble because by hanging out with them it appears I am in support of extramarital affairs, which "reflects poorly on me as an officer of the US Armed Forces." No I'm not making that up or exaggerating in any way. So I guess from now on when someone at work asks me about my weekend I'm just going to have to tell them to [censored] off. I swear my work environment is not lame though, just certain people.

[Blarg]

[ QUOTE ]
I'm new to my company, and we're having a welcoming party this weekend. Someone has to give a short speech introducing me. He will be getting his information based off of a questionaire that I need to give him with the following questions. I'm calling on the collective mind of OOT to come up with some awesome answers. No serious answers allowed, just stuff that will make me sound arrogant, retarded, gay, whatever. I need ideas for:

a favorite color
hobbies
favorite song
special abilities
and "if I had $1M I would..."

[/ QUOTE ]

Favorite color: American
Hobbies: leaving bread crumbs in urinals and coming back and nibbling on them later; slapping dolphins
Favorite songs: ANYthing by Wayne Newton
Special abilities: springing out of the back of a van in the dark; can castrate a sheep without using your hands or feet
If I had one million, I would ... Research and develop tongue protectors to prevent ice cube tray burn.

[NicksDad1970]

[ QUOTE ]
"if I had $1M I would..."

JUMP TO CONCLUSIONS MATT

[/ QUOTE ]

But he's since invented that.

unless you're saying you'd buy one.

[NicksDad1970]

[ QUOTE ]
a favorite color: White
special abilities: power
hobbies: rallys
favorite song:???
and "if I had $1M I would...": support the cause

a favorite color: I dont believe in color
hobbies: equality
favorite song: ?
special abilities: I can see a future of no violence
and "if I had $1M I would..." Free Tibet

a favorite color: Unity
hobbies:Civil rights
favorite song: I shall be released
special abilities: I had a dream, that one day .....
and "if I had $1M I would..." a dollar for each man in the million man march

p.s. that syknard thing is classic......but i would love to see a bosses face reading he first one i wrote

i donot believe it by the way

[/ QUOTE ]


hilarious

[2/325Falcon]

[ QUOTE ]
I should have gone with eviljeff's idea, because I also found out tonight that on Monday I'm going to need to have a little talk with my commander about a poker night I went to with one of my buddies at work. He's going through a divorce and had a female friend over for 100% platonic activities and I'm in trouble because by hanging out with them it appears I am in support of extramarital affairs, which "reflects poorly on me as an officer of the US Armed Forces."

[/ QUOTE ]

HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!

The Army will put you in charge of a multi-million dollar aircraft and let you make life or death decisions for 15 dudes, but you need a babysitter on the weekends because you played cards with a guy who played cards with a woman who is not his wife. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!

[inside??]

Favoite color: Tub girl yellow
Hobbies: autoeroticism
Favorite Song: I am woman Helen Reddy

if I had $1M I would.... not be here participanting in this lame exercise.

[d10]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I should have gone with eviljeff's idea, because I also found out tonight that on Monday I'm going to need to have a little talk with my commander about a poker night I went to with one of my buddies at work. He's going through a divorce and had a female friend over for 100% platonic activities and I'm in trouble because by hanging out with them it appears I am in support of extramarital affairs, which "reflects poorly on me as an officer of the US Armed Forces."

[/ QUOTE ]

HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!

The Army will put you in charge of a multi-million dollar aircraft and let you make life or death decisions for 15 dudes, but you need a babysitter on the weekends because you played cards with a guy who played cards with a woman who is not his wife. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!

[/ QUOTE ]

Does this surprise you? It is in fact the most rediculous load of BS I've been faced with in over 4 years of service, including lots of lower enlisted time, but nothing surprises me anymore.