Post a convo with a customer from your work day

[Wynton]

I'm working from home today, but I'll recreate one from yesterday, when a client called from prison.

Him: Yeah, so what's the deal?
Me: We're still waiting for the district attorney to file their brief.
Him: What the [censored]? Why they doing that?
Me: They claim they're too busy and need more time. I opposed their request, but the court will definitely grant it.
Him: But I'm innocent. They can't do that to me.
Me: This has nothing to do with you.
Him: I think they're delaying because they know I'm innocent.
Me: I doubt it. But the bottom line is there is nothing we can do
Him: Can't you oppose it?
Me: I told you, I opposed it, like I always do. It makes no difference. The court will allow them a couple of extensions.
Him: So, you opposed it?
Me: Yes, I opposed it.
Him: But I'm innocent.
Me: Yes, I know.
Him: Isn't there anything we can do?
Me: No
Him: Did you oppose the request for more time?
Me: Yes, I opposed it.
Him: But my family is waiting for me. I'm innocent. This is [censored] up.
Me: I know. That's why I opposed their request for more time.
Him: So, you opposed it?

Now imagine this going on in the same manner for 10 minutes and you get a sense of the call.

[davelin]

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Just curious what your work is that you use handles like Mouseman while fielding customer calls?

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wow. just wow. really?

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I read bad, please forgive me OOT because I have sinned [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

[Skoob]

Okay, this is slightly off topic because I was the customer in this situation. And it was about 10 years ago and is long, but it's classic...

I'm at a Taco Bell in a mall. All I have on me is a $2 bill and a $50.

Me: I'll take a super taco and a drink.
Cashier: That will be $1.98 (remember, this was more than 10 years ago)
I give him the $2 bill.
Cashier: Do you have anything else?
Me: I have a $50. Can you break that?
Cashier: I would have to ask the manager to open the safe.
Me: Why can't you take this? (i'm still holding the $2 bill.)
Cashier: Um, we just can't.
Me: I don't get what the problem is.
Cashier: Look, we can't. I can get the manager if you want.
Me: Um, sure. Get your manager (I'm not sure yet what the problem is).

The cashier goes over to his manager and I can hear them talking.

Cashier: I think we need to call mall security.
Manager: why?
Cashier: This guy is trying to give me some "funny" money. (now I finally get what the problem is)
Manager: Really? What's it look like?
Cashier: It's a $2 bill.
Manager: A $2 bill?
Cashier: Yeah.
Manager: Does he have anything else?
Cashier: A $50.
Manager: Is the $50 fake?
Cashier: I don't know.

Manager comes over to the counter.

Manager: Sir, is there something I can help you with?
Me: All I want is a super taco and something to drink. This guy won't take my money. (showing him the $2 bill)
Manager: That's a $2 bill.
Me: Yes, it is. (now I'm thinking this guy isn't all that bright either)
Manager: We can't accept that. Do you have anything else?
Me: I have a $50. (I take out the $50 and hand it to him).
Manager: we can't break this (gives me the $50 back).
Me: Okay... what's the problem with this? (showing him the $2 bill again)
Manager: That's a $2 bill, sir. (sounding smug)
Me: Yes, it is. It's real money you know.
Manager: Yeah, right. Would you like me to call mall security?
Me: Go ahead, call them.

So we wait for a few...

Security to Manager: What's the problem?
Manager: This guy has some "funny" money.
Security: What's "funny" about it?
Manager: It's a $2 bill.
Security: Yeah. And?
Manager: It's obviously fake.
Security: What's fake about it?
Manager. It's a $2 bill. He says he has a $50 also.
Security: Is the $50 fake?
Manager: No.
Security: Why would someone make a fake $2 bill?
Manager: I don't know. Can you just get him out of here?
Security: Why won't you take the $50?
Manager: I would have to open the safe.
Security: Why can't you open the safe?
Manger: Not with HIM in here.

Security looks a little annoyed.

Security to me: Sir, can I see this $2 bill?
I hand him the bill.
Security to manager: I don't see any problem with this.
Manager: It's a $2 bill!
Security: Yeah...

It takes a moment, and a little more conversing with the security guard, but then the lights come on.

I ended up with a free taco, a small drink, and some of those cinnamon twist dealies that I don't think they make any more.

[slothinator]

My all time favorite:

Me: Thank you for calling (company), this is xxxx, how may I help you?

Customer: How I get there from BULL RAVEN?

Me: Excuse me?

Customer: How I get there from BULL RUHVINE?

Me: Excuse me sir, are you trying to say BLUE RAVINE?

Customer: Yeah, how I get there BULL RAVINE?

Customer proceeds to keep me on his cell phone for the next 5 minutes while he is driving to our location. Along the way I get little comments like "when they build all these houses?" and "I did not know this was here". I see him pull into the parking lot, still on his cell phone. When he asks "where are you", I describe one of our other coworkers who is conveniently standing at the counter. The customer hangs up his cell phone and walks straight up to my co-worker and begins placing his order, not noticing that the person he is now dealing with is not named xxxx nor was he just on the phone!

[Riverman]

That Taco Bell one is priceless.

[TiK]

[ QUOTE ]
Okay, this is slightly off topic because I was the customer in this situation. And it was about 10 years ago and is long, but it's classic...

I'm at a Taco Bell in a mall. All I have on me is a $2 bill and a $50.

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Your $2 bill encounter reminded me of another that I read about recently: Steve Wozniak's $2 bill encounter

[bwana devil]

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Okay, this is slightly off topic because I was the customer in this situation. And it was about 10 years ago and is long, but it's classic...


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the only funny one in this thread.

geez employees are stupid.

[danzasmack]

We don't have customers. But the guy next to me is a regular gold mine. He went to vegas and did awful things and does his best to tell me about them, but I can barely understand what he says. He starts every conversation by looking at me (i can sense that he has turned and is staring at me) and saying "it's very interesting". When I first started here I was polite and said "oh?" which downgraded to "what!?" and hit an all time low yesterday with me not even turning around and saying "I know."

[Tennenbaum]

Oh man. I get customers who call in from other states asking for dealers in their area. I ask for zip codes etc...

so I'll give them a list and they ask me which one is closer to them..."sorry, I'm not familiar w/ Idaho" "what do you mean, you dont know, you work there!" "Sir, I live in Mass and I've never been to Idaho. I gave you the cities they are located in, I'm not sure which is closer to you, you'll have to call them." This has happened to me on many occasions.

[davelin]

Sweet! I'm going to start paying for everything with $2 bills just for the small chance each time that I'll get something for free.