Unrequited love - what to do? - Page 3

WilyTilt · #21 01-10-2007, 08:29 AM

OP, it seems like you can't communicate honestly unless you're drunk or stoned. You should work on that.

Then let her know that you're interested one more shot - when you're sober and you're prepared, and you can lay out your case to her. If that doesn't work, as it probably won't given what you wrote, then it's time to move on.

edfurlong · #22 01-10-2007, 08:31 AM

[ QUOTE ]
OP, it seems like you can't communicate honestly unless you're drunk or stoned. You should work on that.

Then let her know that you're interested one more shot - when you're sober and you're prepared, and you can lay out your case to her. If that doesn't work, as it probably won't given what you wrote, then it's time to move on.

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Wow, perhaps you should consider not giving advice. To anyone. Ever.

WilyTilt · #23 01-10-2007, 08:32 AM

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
OP, it seems like you can't communicate honestly unless you're drunk or stoned. You should work on that.

Then let her know that you're interested one more shot - when you're sober and you're prepared, and you can lay out your case to her. If that doesn't work, as it probably won't given what you wrote, then it's time to move on.

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Wow, perhaps you should consider not giving advice. To anyone. Ever.

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Por que?

Vyse · #24 01-10-2007, 08:32 AM

Don't you see? You've been compounding the problem by repeatedly chasing her (you say most of the contacts have been coincidental, and I believe you, but mentally you've been chasing her and we both know it) for the past near decade, and every successive time you meet up it makes it that much harder. You're playing yourself. Just be happy that you got to experience such a love and experience such great times in your life, but cut your losses, get realistic, and face the problem head on. Otherwise you're stuck in neutral and will find it very hard to truly love anyone again.

edfurlong · #25 01-10-2007, 08:38 AM

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Por que?

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Because your advice is really bad and you are probably fat as well.

nature\\\'s_hated · #26 01-10-2007, 08:42 AM

Never stoned - I don't smoke dope and neither does she.
But yes, when I've told her I've liked her I've either been drunk or it's been by email, never sober and in person.

I guess I know I need to have the final "reject me pls so I can move on" scene with her, but I'd rather do it when I'm back weighing 180lbs than 225lbs, just in case.

I have a friend who gets laid all the time, a pick-up artist. How different we are - I'm wanting to be in love, to meet "the one", he just wants to get laid. How much more successful he is, and ironically how much more likely he is to actually fall in love than I am!

[ QUOTE ]
OP, it seems like you can't communicate honestly unless you're drunk or stoned. You should work on that.

Then let her know that you're interested one more shot - when you're sober and you're prepared, and you can lay out your case to her. If that doesn't work, as it probably won't given what you wrote, then it's time to move on.

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EYEWHITES · #27 01-10-2007, 08:42 AM

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I'd like 2+2's advice on what to do about a girl I'm helplessly in love with who feels nothing for me.

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i have this friend, former roommate, he is a dog, super ugly. has bad ance scars weighs about 115 lbs, is like 6ft tall...and pulls mad women, and the all fallin love with him. he swears if you want any girl to fall in love with you you have do do only 1 thing...stick a finger up her a$$. i have several other friends who agree. and i sure alot of 2+2 will agree with my SyfIHP theroy.

on a serious note. after 9 years no love. whats the upside, you finally lose your virginity to your dream girl, in her bout of hornyness, thats a pretty big scar. She probably only likes your slacker bohemin(sp?)-ness becuase its irresponsible, and shes responible and has a thursday night primetime greys anatomy life that makes her feel way to grown up. either that or shes one of teh ghey kind anddoesnt want anyone to know.

on another note, you might beable to write a script and sell it to greys anatomny.

get a personal trainer, spend 4 months at the gym forgetting her, fallin love with yourself, mastubate alot, become an a#$hole, becasue a#$hole=panty dropper, and move on.

youseriously know there is no future in this relationship, and your purposley pickeda very unapolgetic form to tell you that

nature\\\'s_hated · #28 01-10-2007, 08:46 AM

Yes, you're right, although the chance encounters were in the first couple of years, and since say 2002 when we've met it's always been because she's phoned/texted me or I've phoned/texted her.

We almost went on holiday last Autumn, I just remembered. We were talking on IM, she said she wanted to go somewhere but had no-one to go with, I quickly said "I'll go with you!" and we were talking about where to go - I have friends in half a dozen European cities, and was planning a great time, till I realised my passport was expired and since it was to be a last-minute trip I couldn't go. I was gutted, obviously, but rather impressed that she was willing to go some place with me.

I wonder too if my drunkenly telling her I still liked her, shortly after I moved round the corner from her flat, was a self-destructive way of sabotaging things between us. Because if I'd not done it, on the basis of our existing friendship she'd have been happy to spend time with me, and something might have developed. It seems like another example of my making sure it didn't.

[ QUOTE ]
Don't you see? You've been compounding the problem by repeatedly chasing her (you say most of the contacts have been coincidental, and I believe you, but mentally you've been chasing her and we both know it) for the past near decade, and every successive time you meet up it makes it that much harder. You're playing yourself. Just be happy that you got to experience such a love and experience such great times in your life, but cut your losses, get realistic, and face the problem head on. Otherwise you're stuck in neutral and will find it very hard to truly love anyone again.

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Vyse · #29 01-10-2007, 08:48 AM

Um, if she wasn't in love with you by then, it's unlikely she ever was going to be. Don't just find another way to blame yourself.

WilyTilt · #30 01-10-2007, 08:49 AM

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Por que?

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Because your advice is really bad and you are probably fat as well.

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Wow, you really tore what I said apart here with your logical brilliance here. "Really bad" is so descriptive of a statement, and "you're fat" is such a powerful ad hominem attack that most of us shouldn't have stopped using it in junior high. Bravo, Socrates.