Homeless people / panhandlers

[By-Tor]

Bushman near Pier 39 in SF always gets mentioned in this type of thread, but I've never found him to be anything more then annoying.

This guy... (which I've posted before)





...got a 5'er from me. He reminded me of some dude I use to party with in high-school and is not aggresive at all. He basically just holds his sign and nods at the laughter of the passer-bys...

[TiK]

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I try to offer food whenever I can...

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If I have food on me, I definitely will do this. Also, if the encounter is around shops, I'll offer to buy them food.

[The Yugoslavian]

Used to be this homeless ripped black guy with a backpack who would hang out outside of this one club in SF (forget...on...harrison? near the freeway anyway). He was really funny b/c he'd just stand next to the line and do pushups and be like "hollatcha girl hollatcha" type stuff. And challenge the dudes to pushup contests and weird [censored].

My buddy didn't get in to the club one night (they thought his ID was fake somehow...v strange) so he sat outside with a magazine from the trash can next to the dude trying to ignore him and finally just like yelling at him that no one wanted his smelly ass there, lol.

Also, on a completely different night there was a group of chicks from school in line who saw me and so as they were trying to infiltrate my group the dude came over and started like giving me tips on how to have sex with the girls...while they were standing there. Pretty awesome! He was saying stuff like "you gotta buy these bitches drinks for tha pussy...my man....hey bitches, you thirsty?"

Man that guy was awesome.

I remember giving him a bit of money sometimes....but it was not entirely clear how homeless he was...he could have just been sorta crazy instead. He always took the $$ tho so I figured he def was homeless, lol.

Yugoslav

[ScottieK]

I work downtown, where there's always a few homeless dudes hanging out. On my way back to lunch one day, this guy at the crosswalk started talking to me. I don't know if he was homeless, but he looked pretty damned close. So he started walking with me, but he didn't hit me up for money just yet. I was in a pretty good mood, so I decided to listen to his spiel. Guy sounded just like Tommy Chong. What the heck, there are enough cops around downtown, why not. Plus he was wearing a Yankees hat. I like the Yankees, so let's take a walk.

So he started off telling me how he just got out of jail for getting into a fight with his brother, or something like that. Ah, that made me feel better. Then he went off on how it was his fault, and he's the family screwup...he needs to get off the sauce and whatnot. Then he started talking politics and spirituality, how all these people expect a handout nowadays and how he needs to accept Jesus into his life, and even though he just got out of jail and doesn't have a dime to his name, he was gonna start doing odd jobs for people and scraping a living together. And how the politicians don't do a damned thing for anyone but themselves, and he wishes they'd just leave everyone alone....I could hardly get in a word edgewise, he talked my ear off for a good fifteen minutes.

When I got close to my building, he asked me if I worked there. Yeah, I work for a bank. So he started talking about how all these huge corporations have all this money, while all the poor people suffer...but that it's kinda justified since people who work are actually working and giving people who can afford it what they want. He also said I should consider myself very lucky that I work where I work and make a living doing it. That lasted for another ten minutes. I didn't mind because he actually had a lot of interesting things to say, and he gave me some things to think about. So of course he got down to it and hit me up for a buck or two. I gave him some money, he definitely earned it talking to me for almost half an hour. Much better than the "spare some change" line I usually get. I still remember that dude, haven't seen him around here since.

Don't know about other places, but most of the guys on the side of the road I've seen have something like "disabled vet" on their signs. Kinda depressing, but it also reminds me of the scene in Falling Down where the guy told Michael Douglas that he was in 'Nam. "You were in the Vietnam War? What were you, a drummer boy?" "Aw man, the Gulf, I meant to say the Gulf...aw #%#$ man just gimme some money!"

The funniest panhandler I've ever seen was a guy taking a bath, fully clothed, in our civic plaza fountain one day. He'd hit people up for change, then start singing Barry Manilow's "Mandy," in a really gruff, semi-drunk voice. "Ohhh Mand-ay....." Hilarious.

ScottieK

[The DaveR]

Relic from the late 90s:



I almost never give change, largely because Berkeley has what feels like the most aggressive panhandlers on Earth and I learned to not notice them. The only exception in the last 10 years was a guy at a stop light who heard the music in my car and said, "Yeah! The Clash! [censored] 'em all!" I gave him a buck.

[turnipmonster]

I almost always give money to musicians if they are good, the exception being the guys I walk by every single day.

I usually never give money to someone who is asking in a subway car. not really sure why, but I just never do it.

outside of subway cars, I will never ignore anyone who approaches me and asks me for money. usually I listen for a second, and then look them in the eye and tell them no or occasionally I'll give them money. for some reason I always feel weird about just ignoring people who are talking to you, even if they are asking for money.

[daryn]

i always give money to bucketman in amherst mass. he's an older black guy who walks around drumming on a bucket he carries, while he sings all the old time classics like satisfaction, mr. postman etc. he calls himself the motown man, benny johnston i think. i really do like his voice. it reminds me of the guy from gnarls barkley somehow. sometimes he wears a flashy cape like james brown.

[rageotones]

i almost never give money to someone if they come up and annoy me. if i see someone with a sign, i'm tempted. i'll give money to an honest sign (e.g. need money to buy beer).

to of the more annoying stories:

1. guy actually walks up to my car while i'm getting food at the drive through. i'm trying to hand my money to the girl and get my food, and he's just standing right in that little space b/t the car and the building.

he said something about getting ditched by his girlfriend or something. i didn't really listen b/c he'd already made my drive-through experience more annoying, and there was no way he was getting anything from me.

2. guy approaches a friend and me while we're going in to buy some food (note: he wreaks of booze). he gives us the out of gas routine, but then goes on to mention how he owns this car shop. i guess this is trying to convince us that he contributes to society or something. i started tuning out soon after, and all i could think to myself was, "if he runs a car shop, shouldn't he know that he needed gas to make his car run?"

[RiverFenix]

My last homeless guy story.
1 AM or so Im walking to a bar to meet some friends.
"Hey man, you got some money? I really need some chicken wings"
"I have a few bucks, how much are they?"
"I need like 3 bucks"
"Ok, heres 3 bucks."
"Hey man, can I get that 10 in your wallet too, im pretty hungry" (I only had a 10 and 3 singles)
"Are you serious? No"
--this goes back and forth for about 30 seconds w/ him asking for the 10 and be calling him an ingrateful pos. I eventually tell him to [censored] off and im never giving him money again (I see him a good amount).


I like giving money to this old black guy who plays the guitar and has a really loud / distinct voice since hes one of the few homeless guys I see that entertains for money.


I generally have no problem tossing a few bucks to a homeless person. The utility gained by them is a lot higher than it would be for me.

[jgorham]

My best homeless people story:

OOT thread