"Business" Talk

[Los Feliz Slim]

FYI, Shant, we're putting cover sheets on the TPS reports, so if you could go ahead and do that from now on, that'd be great.

[Gunny Highway]

I'm going to bet that they'd all have the same reaction if they ended up spending time around one of the design firms you worked at.

[Kneel B4 Zod]

re: catchphrases. Meh, pretty standard...and after a while they make sense!

re: "q3": hey it's at least shorter than saying "third quarter"!

[Gildwulf]

Oh also, next time someone asks if you need to touch base, just respond "all my base are fine, thanks"

[Dids]

[ QUOTE ]
They're just weak-minded individuals trying to sound intelligent and important. Just smile and nod.

[/ QUOTE ]

It's key to understand that this is 100% not the case.

It's a matter of function, not style.

[MaxPower]

What you need to do is print out a little bingo card with all of these phrases on them. Keep it on your desk along with a marker. Distribute them to your friends. Then whenever someone says one of the business-speak phrases, you mark it off. The first one to get bingo wins a prize.

In some cases lingo makes it somewhat easier to communicate (for example, Q1, Q2 etc.). In many cases business-speak is used by people who really have nothing to say and are trying to sound smart and important. When people start talking about synergy and corporate values, you can be pretty sure that they are full of it.

The one phrase that drives me crazy is when someone says, "Let's take that discussion offline" This is usually said in a meeting when some one brings up something the leader doesn't want to discuss.

[MikeNaked]

Another good one is "Please advise." which is an email euphemism for "Get off your ass and fix this problem."

[shant]

[ QUOTE ]
I'm going to bet that they'd all have the same reaction if they ended up spending time around one of the design firms you worked at.

[/ QUOTE ]
Why though? We just talk in what I assume would be normal "weekend" language for these people.

[Gunny Highway]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I'm going to bet that they'd all have the same reaction if they ended up spending time around one of the design firms you worked at.

[/ QUOTE ]
Why though? We just talk in what I assume would be normal "weekend" language for these people.

[/ QUOTE ]

You don't. You just don't realize it because it sounds normal to you. Your reaction to that office (although that place sounds pretty extreme) is pretty much the same reaction I have to about half the threads in 00T. It's like WTF? People actually talk like that? Or who does that? Part of why I like 00T.

[Dids]

""Let's take that discussion offline" "

This one does bug me because A- it's a misuse of "offline" B- it's typically a passive agressive way of saying "I don't feel this is important/you are wasting my time/this isn't appropriate for this meeting".

I guess I should back off my "100%" statement from earlier, because I just remember my co-worker who usually mangles phrases like this as part of some excuse to present whatever horrible idea she's about to offer. I do think she's the exception and not the rule.