Dear Bison February 2006: The Seed 2.0

[bisonbison]

I have been smelling something hoorible all day. It's kind of like diarhea mixed with garbage juice. I thought I was smelling my top lip, so I washed it, but I still smell it. What could it be?

Dear ducks,

Check your bathroom, check your sinks, check your fridge, check your trash cans. If that doesn't solve it, it's time to clean your place from top to bottom.

[Ben Young]

Dear Bison,
Is it ok if I ask multiple questions?

Assuming yes,
a) should I start doing book reviews in OOT, in the style of the film reviews, where I take suggestions from OOTiots?
b)why do I like smoking?
c)how can I milk my broken elbow to get some poon? I go to college.

[Thebram]

Dear Bison,

Would you like to live in a chocolate city, or is there another flavor that you'd prefer?

[PokerBob]

[ QUOTE ]
i have to let my school district know if i am coming back to my teaching job by March 1. should i go back, or take another year of leave to pursue life as a professional poker player?

Dear bob,

Are you happy as a poker player? Poker is a pretty straightforward job. Besides learning more games and getting deeper into the strategy, there's not a lot of surprises in store for you. That having been said, depending on your earn, you can do pretty much anything you want with your spare time. For a lot of people, that's enough to offer a happy life.

[/ QUOTE ]

dear bison,
thank you for the well thought out response, but i am merely looking for someone to tell me what to do, as i am not a man.

pokerbob

[Georgia Avenue]

Dear Bison,

Can a 29 year old balding guy who wears tweed blazers with elbow patch whatsits to work still consider himself "punk rock"...?

Notes:
He still has a leather jacket
He still has less than 15k in the bank
He listens to punk rock music, but also like chick stuff too
He occasionally has a glass of red wine with dinner

Am I, er, Is he too old and uncool for this epithet?
--GA

[bisonbison]

do you think the extended order can be modified via rational constructivism?


Dear Mr.,

The extended order can be modified by individual effort, so it makes sense that it could be modified by someone coming from a rational constuctivist paradigm.

Don't expect huge results though. This crap is subtle.

[MattSuspect]

Dear Bison,

So should I? Or Shouldn't I?

Best,
Hammy's Pal

[SuitedSixes]

BB-

Here is a doozy:

I have been married for 5 1/2 years and have a daughter who is almost 4. My wife and I have not really even liked each other for the last 3 years. She has moved out no less than 8 times and in September we both moved into different houses and she filed for divorce.

We made no attempts at counselling or anything else. I knew the marriage sucked, but didn't think divorce should come before counselling. I was depressed about the whole thing, and hated only seeing my daughter 3-4 days a week.

In the time we have been seperated there have been a few moments where we have both felt a spark of the old feelings, but nothing recently. Just when I was getting used to the whole "being divorced" thing and ready to move on with my life, my wife said that she was stopping the divorce. It turns out that she wants another baby (with me, which is great 'cause that means I may get laid in 2006) but wants me to be more financially secure (I play a popular online game for a living). She asked if I knew of a counselor, but doesn't want me to make an appointment, yet.

She changes her mind so frequently that I have decided to just write down when she says something knew and put a date by it. If she still feels the same way a month later than I can react, but otherwise it's pretty much just wasted energy.

I don't want to be divorced, to have my daughter go through the whole step-family/half-family thing and I want to see her everyday, but I don't really want to be married to my wife anymore either and I think alot of damage has already been done, I'm a pretty forgiving person, but she pretty much treats me like [censored]. She is from another country and the cultural difference are just huge. I think that I could fall in love with her again as easily as I could someone else.

What's my play?

[bisonbison]

How much do resume gaps bother employers when the applicant is in his mid-late 20's and has a few years of experience before the gap?

Dear RunDown,

They bother employers to the extent that the employee is ill-suited for the position, unenthusiastic in the interview and unable to explain the gap in a reasonable way.

For most entry-level jobs (I don't mean fry cook), a gap is not a deal-breaker. I got my job at Google with a year gap prior to the interview (wasn't sure what to say about poker on paper) and some not stellar previous work.

[yasher]

Dear Bison,

How do you tell the difference between a mouse and a hamster?

For 6s,
yasher