Pregnant GF

[Blarg]

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Wow tough spot OP....you gotta talk this through with ur gf. Can she be convinced to put the child for adoption? My 2c is that this is best . .what you've got to realise is that the most important thing in this whole [censored] situation is that the kid gets brought up right.

Oh yeah forget about all this "it's not fair, she changed her mind" bs. If your situation is "unfair" think about how "unfair" your child's situation is going to be if you run away. If ur gf keeps the kid then you have to be there as a parent. Running is totally not an option.

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Yes it is, though it might not be the best one.

However, would having a father around who resents you be the best one? As a stepkid whose dad pretty much hated him and showed it almost every single damn day, I'm not sure it is. I'd really rather have had someone phoning in the money.

Besides, the option of abortion might not be locked off, however unlikely. It's too early for poppa to fold all his cards.

[Butso]

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Yes it is, though it might not be the best one.

However, would having a father around who resents you be the best one? As a stepkid whose dad pretty much hated him and showed it almost every single damn day, I'm not sure it is. I'd really rather have had someone phoning in the money.

Besides, the option of abortion might not be locked off, however unlikely. It's too early for poppa to fold all his cards.

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If OP runs then its going to be pretty darn obvious to his kid that their father didn't care too much for him/her anyway. Running is definitely the worst thing OP can do

[Edge34]

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Yes it is, though it might not be the best one.

However, would having a father around who resents you be the best one? As a stepkid whose dad pretty much hated him and showed it almost every single damn day, I'm not sure it is. I'd really rather have had someone phoning in the money.

Besides, the option of abortion might not be locked off, however unlikely. It's too early for poppa to fold all his cards.

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If OP runs then its going to be pretty darn obvious to his kid that their father didn't care too much for him/her anyway. Running is definitely the worst thing OP can do

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Nah, his stellar life as a mediocre rounder living in a hick town (as he puts it) is really about as sweet as I could imagine it.

Screw thinking about the kid or the girl he claimed to love and was planning on marrying anyways. As a matter of fact, I think the girl going back on her "promise" to abort is a lot worse than him going back on his word that he actually loved her. Why? Because I'm guessing if this makes him want to split, he never actually loved her in the first place. She'll probably be better off without him. (Interesting, I just supported him splitting for the good of the woman he doesn't love and the child he already resents.)

[guids]

I hooked up with this chick thursday night, we were pretty drunk, and geeked out, I got in w/o condom, after I finally actually get it all the way up after a minute or so, I threw on a condom. This post has me all paranoid that, in that minute or so I completely screwed myself.

[Blarg]

No it's not. As I noted, some parents are a misery on their children. As a kid who was raised in a family that took in counless foster kids over the years, and as a stepkid myself, I've got tons of real life experience in seeing exactly that.

There's all the difference in the world between being a parent and being a good parent. And it matters enormously.

You can certainly be an unloving, resentful, unkind, even scary parent. Even if you live in the same house. They happen all the time. Really they do.

An option that might be just as good would be to support the kid but split the vicinity. At any rate, certainly none of us knows how things would turn out, so it isn't correct to presume we do.

[Butso]

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No it's not. As I noted, some parents are a misery on their children. As a kid who was raised in a family that took in counless foster kids over the years, and as a stepkid myself, I've got tons of real life experience in seeing exactly that.

There's all the difference in the world between being a parent and being a good parent. And it matters enormously.

You can certainly be an unloving, resentful, unkind, even scary parent. Even if you live in the same house. They happen all the time. Really they do.

An option that might be just as good would be to support the kid but split the vicinity. At any rate, certainly none of us knows how things would turn out, so it isn't correct to presume we do.

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Because the OP is annoyed with his gf that she has "changed her mind" he will be resentful, unloving, etc to his child? I don't know about this tbh, but even if so I think adoption >>>running.

There are plenty of potential good parents out there who will be able to do a better job than OP's gf can on her own (based on what I've read in this thread) and offer the kid a better environment, opportunities, etc.

[Cablelessray]

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I've been with my GF for about a year and a half now. She's 20, I'm 22. She was grown up Catholic, but lost her religion a few years ago. Nowadays she is very liberal and openminded. We have a very healthy, open relationship. Very good communication. We almost always know how the other is feeling/thinking.

During our ENTIRE relationship, we've had numerous conversations about how neither of us are ready to have kids, how we've got the whole world to see before we drop anchor, and how if we're ever in that situation there is only 1 way to handle it.

That's right folks, I've been planning ahead for this scenario for the extent of the relationship. I've made it perfectly clear from day 1 that I will not be ready to have kids until I'm 25+. She never had any problems with that, and seemed to completely agree. We would constantly make jokes about how "we're not driving a [censored] minivan" "no way we're raising a kid in this crappy town" etc etc. She has been taking her birth control every day for ~4 years. Even when we pass out drunk, she'll wake up at 4am and take it - no exceptions.



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next time get it in writing

[Misfire]

I didn't read the other responses, but OP, if you leave this girl, you're a [censored] douche and you deserve to be discarded like a bloody fetus. People MUCH worse off than you are raising children in places MUCH worse than where you are. Be a [censored] man and take responsibility for your actions.

[jogger08152]

Adoption?

[SuitedSixes]

As the father of an unplanned child just let me say that the great thing about kids is that they take 9 months to show up. You can do alot of preparation and "mind changing" in that time. Embrace the whirlwind my friend.