Girlfriends going to parties without you - advice?

[tuq]

td,

I guess I'm just not getting the tone that so many others are. So it goes with the written word (example: although I believe emoticons can be emasculating, I will bring myself to use them if it can clear up any confusion).

That said I think everyone, including you and me, are jealous of all the hot chicks that Felix nails! [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[Felix_Nietzsche]

The issue is for the OP to show some self-respect.
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Bingo. When someone close to you disrespects you never let it slide. Call them out on it. It makes life MUCH easier. And when you call someone out, do it in a firm/serious way. Going postal can actually have the opposite effect. It is OK to be angry but keep it in control.


I see absolutely nothing in Felix' responses that implies "keeping them in their place".
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Me neither. I'm not sure how I got accused of being some control freak. If some one can show me where I said this then show me. Everything I posted is on record here.

But it is true I don't believe in 50/50 relationships.
I like 60/40 relationships with me being the '60'. Being lazy by nature, 100/0 is too much work. 60/40 is a nice combo for me. Someone has to be the alpha dog and I'm happiest when the alpha dog is me. For the OP, his so-called GF is the Alpha and MOST woman don't like being in that role. He needs to learn that you do not show love by allowing someone to disrespect you.

[Felix_Nietzsche]

I turn 22 2 weeks from Wednesday, am just about in my ideal physical shape and have an amazing girlfriend too. So apparently you're not the only one who can accomplish something good. Logically following that means, SURPRISE, you don't have to dominate a relationship to have a good fulfilling one.
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LOL.....A 22 year old giving relationship advice. PRICELESS. Thanks for the laugh. I'll be sure to PM you if I need relationship advice. Your wealth of experience should help a lot. [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

[Shoe]

From what I have read, she is definitely losing interest in the relationship. If she was comitted to you, she would have said, will you come with me to so and so party on so and so night?

If you still like her, i would keep seeing her, but definitely voice your displeasure and keep your options open.

[Edge34]

[ QUOTE ]
I turn 22 2 weeks from Wednesday, am just about in my ideal physical shape and have an amazing girlfriend too. So apparently you're not the only one who can accomplish something good. Logically following that means, SURPRISE, you don't have to dominate a relationship to have a good fulfilling one.
************************************************** *******
LOL.....A 22 year old giving relationship advice. PRICELESS. Thanks for the laugh. I'll be sure to PM you if I need relationship advice. Your wealth of experience should help a lot. [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

[/ QUOTE ]

Well, with any luck, I won't turn out to be a sad old prick like you. Thanks for THAT laugh, I'll keep you posted. Tool.

BTW, have you ever considered that a great deal of people here are much closer to my age bracket than yours? I mean, i'm sure an overweight 40-year old knows perfectly how to deal with all the 21-year-olds you're banging nightly.

[AMT]

does this happen a lot? if she called you she probably was just ignorant to asking you...if she was trying to sneak off she would not have called. ask her, but dont be a douche unless she resists and gives you [censored], then you can be upset.

[AMT]

[ QUOTE ]
LOL.....A 22 year old giving relationship advice. PRICELESS. Thanks for the laugh. I'll be sure to PM you if I need relationship advice. Your wealth of experience should help a lot.


[/ QUOTE ]

an unmarried middle aged man should not be ignorant to listening to advice from people of any age. i do not think anyone should be ignorant of this, as i have gotten better advice from people under the age of 25 than i have from people over in my life time. ive also gone through more life and death experiences and emotional trauma at age 19 than i believe most older people to have gone through, and im not being an arrogant college prick, im actually more rational with this post now than in the "favorite stoner" thread [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[Edge34]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
LOL.....A 22 year old giving relationship advice. PRICELESS. Thanks for the laugh. I'll be sure to PM you if I need relationship advice. Your wealth of experience should help a lot.


[/ QUOTE ]

an unmarried middle aged man should not be ignorant to listening to advice from people of any age. i do not think anyone should be ignorant of this, as i have gotten better advice from people under the age of 25 than i have from people over in my life time. ive also gone through more life and death experiences and emotional trauma at age 19 than i believe most older people to have gone through, and im not being an arrogant college prick, im actually more rational with this post now than in the "favorite stoner" thread [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[/ QUOTE ]

Seriously, you'd think the overweight 40-year-olds would want to know what us kids who haven't gotten entirely jaded to women think. Of course, I'm guessing anybody irrational enough to take a shot at me simply due to my age won't be intelligent enough to get that part either. [img]/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

The funniest part - most of my posts were about having self-respect as much as his were. The reason he wants to say things like "good luck on Oprah" is because *GASP* I actually advocated thinking about what the GF might want/think too. Wow.

[tuq]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
an unmarried middle aged man should not be ignorant to listening to advice from people of any age. i do not think anyone should be ignorant of this, as i have gotten better advice from people under the age of 25 than i have from people over in my life time. ive also gone through more life and death experiences and emotional trauma at age 19 than i believe most older people to have gone through, and im not being an arrogant college prick, im actually more rational with this post now than in the "favorite stoner" thread [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[/ QUOTE ]

Seriously, you'd think the overweight 40-year-olds would want to know what us kids who haven't gotten entirely jaded to women think. Of course, I'm guessing anybody irrational enough to take a shot at me simply due to my age won't be intelligent enough to get that part either. [img]/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img]

The funniest part - most of my posts were about having self-respect as much as his were. The reason he wants to say things like "good luck on Oprah" is because *GASP* I actually advocated thinking about what the GF might want/think too. Wow.

[/ QUOTE ]

[/ QUOTE ]I'll take "showing your age" for $1000, Alex.

While Felix has taken his fair share of pot shots, there's no need to be passive-aggressive, and in just these last few posts you have both made the following mistakes:

- somehow assuming that because there's more 18-24 YOs on this forum that it supports your case

- not realizing that Felix was himself once 22, so not only does he have that experience, he has 18 more years of success and failure on top of that

- variance...of course there's going to be 20 YOs who know more about getting laid than 40 YOs, but the number will be substantially smaller. E.g. women drivers suck more than men on average, but there's plenty of them who drive better than many men, given their huge sample size.

- I'd really like to hear how he is "jaded" to women. He merely told OP to stand up for himself - != to being jaded or a woman-hater!

- the fact that you (GASP) wanted to think about what the woman wanted too is irrelevant as it was laid out by the OP. OF COURSE we care what our SO wants in a healthy relationship. OP did not present such a scenario.

Finally - and here's a comment that while 100% true I'm sure you won't listen to based off of your responses in this thread thus far - EVERY SINGLE GUY I KNOW over the age of 30 just laughs about how much more pussy they could have pulled back in the day "if I only knew then what I know now". This has nothing to do with disrespect for women or rufis or anything, but everything to do with what to say, how to act, etc., based off of past failures.

[marsvolta619]

[ QUOTE ]
Funny stuff but I think I met your girlfriend last night mr Marsvolta...was your girls party in PB?...

[/ QUOTE ]

No, North Park. Plus, I wasnt pissy to her, I just let her know how I felt afterwards. I was pissy on here

And my read on the situation was that it's ignorance and not any malice. Her last boyfriend before me was 2+ years ago, and she didn't try and hide anything. Now, if she was already AT the party when she told me she was going, there would be a problem there