Problem with husband of friend - need advice please

[CORed]

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Then, he told me she ran to the store, and didn't tell me the truth until after I had a glass of wine.

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You should probably be thankful that he didn't drug the wine.

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I think he was hoping for consensual sex, with rape as the backup plan.

[suzzer99]

I sort of grunched the cat thing. Your uncle made sure you adopted his cats from beyond the grave or something right? (the uncle, not the cats)

[CORed]

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If I do file a report, can it be kept confidential? Does anyone know what the repercussions would be? Would they have to go talk to him, or if I ask the police to just keep it on record in case will they do that?

Will it even be taken seriously if I do? After all, besides him being a major scumbag, all he did was grab my arm (and block the door which I can't prove). Saying I would be extremly sorry is obviously a threat to scare me, but he didn't say he would actually hurt me. He could just say that he meant I would regret losing the friendship with his wife, etc.

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Grabbing you and blocking the door makes it an attempted sexual assault, or at least physical assault. His behavior was definitely criminal. OTOH, it's your word against his, although the bruise certainly gives your version some corroboration. The threat is non-specific enough that I don't think it constitutes a crime by itself. It's hard to predict what will happen if you report it to the police. Most likely they will talk to him, and he will probably lie to them. Most likely he won't be charged, unless he's foolish enough to confess, as there is probably not enough evidence to convict him.

I wouldn't count on it staying confidential if you report it.

[Boris]

If the husband was Larry Craig I would 100% believe the OP.

[It's Brandt]

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If the husband was Larry Craig I would 100% believe the OP.

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Dude, OP is a woman.

[DMC0627]

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I sort of grunched the cat thing. Your uncle made sure you adopted his cats from beyond the grave or something right? (the uncle, not the cats)

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He wasn't my uncle, I never met him. That's why is was so strange.

[aladare]

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Am I the only one who doesn't believe a word of this?

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I dont believe it because of this...

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I ended up kneeing him in his balls, and leaving.

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I can't really explain why, but something about that and just leaving without anything else doesn't seem right. I highly doubt the story would of ended just at that if that really did happen. Something about him chasing after her, screaming or more violence sounds about right. Even if he took a knee flush in the balls (which is doubtful in this case), he wouldn't be on the floor unconscious or anything.

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no, and i am a woman too, so this sounds really odd, and well, scripted.b Any woman would just call the cops IMHO.

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uh huh, thats why most rapes go unreported

the fact you believe this makes me believe you arent really a woman

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yeah, i know a lot of these things do not get reported, so i misspoke when i stated that ANY woman would just call the cops- BUT what i meant by that, is:
1) this person is older, and divorced and not a young woman dealing with a brand new scary thing. By middle age, a woman would have dealt with multiple bad men experiences for decades now and so not as unreluctent to call the cops.
2) OOT was awesome in advice- CALL THE COPS! (and OP did not) WHY????
3) b/c this jerk assualted & threatened her, that you report...maybe not the assualt to press charges but alert the cops that a threat(s) have been made.
4) Having been in weird/scary situations myself, not too far from the premise of this post- it seemed scripted compared to my simialar experience- so i questioned the validity.
5) i already knew of OP from American Idol posts- which are very strange.

AND last but most important- IF you question my femaleness- then this next Friday i will be at the LA 2+2 get together and there will be NO question of me and who i am.
Maybe OP should post pics of herself...dunno, but i've had to prove my gender...and you seem to be the ONLY one now questioning that. My avatar is a pic of ME being weird. Orig pic posted in another thread- not by me, posted by suzzer (who is my very good friend)

-ala

[pergesu]

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Am I the only one who doesn't believe a word of this?

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I dont believe it because of this...

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I ended up kneeing him in his balls, and leaving.

[/ QUOTE ]

I can't really explain why, but something about that and just leaving without anything else doesn't seem right. I highly doubt the story would of ended just at that if that really did happen. Something about him chasing after her, screaming or more violence sounds about right. Even if he took a knee flush in the balls (which is doubtful in this case), he wouldn't be on the floor unconscious or anything.

[/ QUOTE ]
no, and i am a woman too, so this sounds really odd, and well, scripted.b Any woman would just call the cops IMHO.

[/ QUOTE ]

uh huh, thats why most rapes go unreported

the fact you believe this makes me believe you arent really a woman

[/ QUOTE ]
yeah, i know a lot of these things do not get reported, so i misspoke when i stated that ANY woman would just call the cops- BUT what i meant by that, is:
1) this person is older, and divorced and not a young woman dealing with a brand new scary thing. By middle age, a woman would have dealt with multiple bad men experiences for decades now and so not as unreluctent to call the cops.
2) OOT was awesome in advice- CALL THE COPS! (and OP did not) WHY????
3) b/c this jerk assualted & threatened her, that you report...maybe not the assualt to press charges but alert the cops that a threat(s) have been made.
4) Having been in weird/scary situations myself, not too far from the premise of this post- it seemed scripted compared to my simialar experience- so i questioned the validity.
5) i already knew of OP from American Idol posts- which are very strange.

AND last but most important- IF you question my femaleness- then this next Friday i will be at the LA 2+2 get together and there will be NO question of me and who i am.
Maybe OP should post pics of herself...dunno, but i've had to prove my gender...and you seem to be the ONLY one now questioning that. My avatar is a pic of ME being weird. Orig pic posted in another thread- not by me, posted by suzzer (who is my very good friend)

-ala

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Suzzer has friends? I think my world just got turned upside down.

[suzzer99]

So all the gay dudes molesting you and everything didn't do it? It took this.

[pergesu]

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So all the gay dudes molesting you and everything didn't do it? It took this.

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Not really. I'm kinda pretty. So I expect it.

I'm just kidding of course. You called me on my birthday. I think you're cool and I bet you've got billions of friends.