*OFFICIAL* Sexytime Containment Thread

[goofyballer]

[ QUOTE ]
dibz: Did you miss the part where I had lots of sexytime with someone I care a lot about?

Pwned right back atcha.

[/ QUOTE ]

That's really not a nice thing to someone GA.

[keikiwai]

GA, i like your relatively difficult to trainwreck photo of her

here a GA style photo of SLF:

[Georgia Avenue]

goofy: Your sentence is missing a something.

[Anacardo]

Got a short but sweet beat for all you upstanding whatevers out there.

So last night was FFK's 24th, happy birthday FFK. I was there floating amongst her crowd of ex-sorority sisters and allied tradespeople, trying to chat this chick (we'll call her 'Jane') whom I had met previously and whose jib i liked the cut of. She was kinda having none of it, which was novel as I'm not used to girls finding me completely uninteresting. "Nice-enough-but-not-attractive," sure; "maybe-if-he-wasn't-so-weird/creepy/awkward", super-standard; but "bored-to-tears?" That's all but unheard of. Anyway. I am struggling to rouse her interest out back by the Amstel keg when this other girl, whom I barely know from Eve - we'll call her '[censored] [censored]' - sidles up to say:

"Blah blah, Ross, something something, you're just soooo cool. I hear you have a crush on Jane!" She is of course standing right there not a foot from her, face to face.

I am absolutely stunned, search my mind for anything that I could say that could possibly help rather than hurt, and find nothing, so I blink twice and soldier on w/ my story -

"Yeah, so... the building I was in was a [censored] dungeon, but..."

"Yeah so you toooootally wanna [censored] her, right?"

Stunned again. WTF do you say or do in response to this? I just rolled my eyes, said 'Nice night, ladies,' and walked off. Were she a dude I would have found a nice quiet corner in which to gut-punch her. I'm cringing again just thinking about it.

CLIFFS NOTES: Bitches try to clown me.

In other beat news, the sweet little blonde sabreuse I met a few weeks ago brought her heretofore unmentioned boyfriend to today's tournament. I am now completely out of Atlanta-based prospects. Holla at a balla.

[Georgia Avenue]

Thats a pretty standard cockblock my man.

Next time, rather than get mad I'd see it as an invitation to a wits-duel.

Possible responses:

"Ew, I don't like GIRLS yuck."

"Stop projecting Ellen, I heard about your rugmunchin ways!"

"Do you even know what that words means or did your daddy tell you that " [censored] " was a kind of thumbwrestling? "

"I'm sorry Jane, this groupie keeps trying to get my autograph. Where do you want it honey? On the face like last time?"

Or just play it straight, turn to the cblocking bitch and say: "Man, you are not cute when you're jealous."

WHatever you do, dont give up in this sitch imo. If a random cares enough to get in your way you're probably getting somewhere.

[NozeCandy]

I brought home a girl who was, in retrospect, obviously blacked out last night. I was pretty gone too, so we just made out and I turned over to fall asleep. She calls me her boyfriend in a drunken mumble that I can barely understand.

We wake up the next morning, I call her a drunk idiot for calling me her boyfriend and [censored] her twice before rolling out of bed to watch football. It was good.

[Anacardo]

GA,

Doubtful. Firstly, Jane was not what you would call cooperative up to that point. Secondly, I feel like in a spot that blatant, if a girl likes you at all, even to the point of basic human decency and politeness, she'll help you out of the jam. Instead I got dead, stony silence, which only helped to intensify the cringeworthiness of it all. Seems like an easy muck.

Which is not to say you don't have a point. Basically, I have far too few social-response options between 'appeal to reason' and 'kick in kneecap.'

FURTHER EDIT: Your example lines all suck.

[The Man Mulcahey]

[ QUOTE ]
I brought home a girl who was, in retrospect, obviously blacked out last night. I was pretty gone too, so we just made out and I turned over to fall asleep. She calls me her boyfriend in a drunken mumble that I can barely understand.

We wake up the next morning, I call her a drunk idiot for calling me her boyfriend and [censored] her twice before rolling out of bed to watch football. It was good.

[/ QUOTE ]
vnh

[mmbt0ne]

Cardo,

Meh, lines 2 and 4 are pretty good, 2 being the best imo.

But yeah, I talked to that girl a little later and she's kind of a bitch.

Also, agree with "I have far too few social-response options between 'appeal to reason' and 'kick in kneecap.' " It's all good my man, you know I'm a fan.

[Anacardo]

'T0ne,

So did you nail A or what.