"Make a million $$ in a few minutes of work each day"...good idea???

[Foucault]

Assani,

You should explore more thoroughly the consequences of showing up drunk for work. Would it not be a breach of contract? Even if you think the odds of your employers noticing that you are drunk on any given day are quite low, you are talking about doing this every day for 20 years, so the odds of being discovered eventually are astronomically high. It would be a shame to get caught 5 years in and lose your money for violating your contract.

[vikefan24]

Do you get weekends off?

[Assani Fisher]

Ok, ok....I wouldn't show up drunk.

[nyc999]

I recommend taking the position if its demands will prevent you from creating onslaughts.

[acesonly532]

morons....do not take the contract....if you didnt take the contract and worked 21 years you would make 999,999 $..if you didnt like it then quit after a year...if you took the contract for that extra dollar and hated it...it would suck for you...use your head

[BoilingOatRunner]

I guess I'm a bit surprised that more people didn't have something to say about this. I kinda figured a lot of people would have had experience in this line of work, but I suppose I'll offer my perspective.

Was looking for a job in the paper back in the mid 90's when I got laid off, saw a wanted ad for a job that was easy money and short hours, and well, long story short, I've been running boiling oats around in New City for about 9 years.

I'll tell you this. The first couple of months are pretty brutal. Until you figure out how to get a solid grip on the boiling oat bucket, you're going to burn yourself, a lot. And they don't tell you this up front, but you can't wear any protective gear on your hands or arms either. And whoever suggested that wagon thing, yeah, you'd think that would be a good idea, but this guy Bruce tried that one and the supervisors tasered him in the balls. No joke. They try to tell you the supervisors will cut you some slack, but that's just a bait and switch. If you slow down because you burned yourself, or you step more than 2 feet off the line, you're not going home without at least 2 or 3 lashes. And one day, well, I got a pretty bad cramp and slowed down for a few steps. Let's just say, having one of the supervisors knock you down from behind onto a hot bucket of boiling oats is not so great for your skin.

And forget about ever showing up drunk or wearing socks. My buddy Joey did that once. Great guy, he'd put in over 19 years of stellar boiling oat running and was one of the top points-leaders for making supervisor. His dog died one night and he went out and got wasted. He showed up pretty drunk around 4:30, and the supervisors caught on pretty quick. He couldn't keep up with me that day on the oat run, and all I know is that I heard a loud crashing sound from behind me after about half a mile. His funeral was a few days later. I still miss him.

But look, there's a lot of positives. I mean, I'm done working for the day almost every day by 4:45 AM, which leaves me time to go to the doctors for my daily skin grafts and physical therapy from all the third degree burns. And you can definitely play poker afterwards, like Assani suggested, but you'll probably need to get some voice recognition software since your hands might not work so good.

But hey, it's a great job. I'm always looking to get some more people recruited too, so I can make supervisor in 12 years.

Best of luck, Assani. Hope to see you out on the oat run soon!

-BoilingOatRunner

[vikefan24]

^^LMAO nh

[IWEARGOGGLES]

[ QUOTE ]
I guess I'm a bit surprised that more people didn't have something to say about this. I kinda figured a lot of people would have had experience in this line of work, but I suppose I'll offer my perspective.

Was looking for a job in the paper back in the mid 90's when I got laid off, saw a wanted ad for a job that was easy money and short hours, and well, long story short, I've been running boiling oats around in New City for about 9 years.

I'll tell you this. The first couple of months are pretty brutal. Until you figure out how to get a solid grip on the boiling oat bucket, you're going to burn yourself, a lot. And they don't tell you this up front, but you can't wear any protective gear on your hands or arms either. And whoever suggested that wagon thing, yeah, you'd think that would be a good idea, but this guy Bruce tried that one and the supervisors tasered him in the balls. No joke. They try to tell you the supervisors will cut you some slack, but that's just a bait and switch. If you slow down because you burned yourself, or you step more than 2 feet off the line, you're not going home without at least 2 or 3 lashes. And one day, well, I got a pretty bad cramp and slowed down for a few steps. Let's just say, having one of the supervisors knock you down from behind onto a hot bucket of boiling oats is not so great for your skin.

And forget about ever showing up drunk or wearing socks. My buddy Joey did that once. Great guy, he'd put in over 19 years of stellar boiling oat running and was one of the top points-leaders for making supervisor. His dog died one night and he went out and got wasted. He showed up pretty drunk around 4:30, and the supervisors caught on pretty quick. He couldn't keep up with me that day on the oat run, and all I know is that I heard a loud crashing sound from behind me after about half a mile. His funeral was a few days later. I still miss him.

But look, there's a lot of positives. I mean, I'm done working for the day almost every day by 4:45 AM, which leaves me time to go to the doctors for my daily skin grafts and physical therapy from all the third degree burns. And you can definitely play poker afterwards, like Assani suggested, but you'll probably need to get some voice recognition software since your hands might not work so good.

But hey, it's a great job. I'm always looking to get some more people recruited too, so I can make supervisor in 12 years.

Best of luck, Assani. Hope to see you out on the oat run soon!

-BoilingOatRunner

[/ QUOTE ]

Obviously a fake account because he said you'd get fired if you didn't go your fastest each and every time. Stopping because you got burnt = instant firing.

[BoilingOatRunner]

[ QUOTE ]
Obviously a fake account because he said you'd get fired if you didn't go your fastest each and every time. Stopping because you got burnt = instant firing.

[/ QUOTE ]

So you're going to trust this Assani guy who never carried an oat in his life and is obsessed with Onslaughts over a guy who has been running steaming oats around for nearly a decade? Whatever, you do what you want. Jesus, man, has every single job you've ever had been exactly what they described to you while you were interviewing?

Of course they tell all the new people they'll get fired for slowing down, otherwise they'd never bust ass the entire way. And if they catch you slacking, they'll make sure you know it. But, honestly, if they fired everyone who slowed down for a few steps when they bumped their forearms on the bucket, they'd have nobody to carry the oats!

-BoilingOatRunner

[Georgia Avenue]

BOR:

Do they give you internet while boiling hot oat running?
Do you have to wear a uniform, nametag, flair, etc?
How about a hat?
What kind of person are they looking for?
Zima?

Thank you for your service to our country:
--GA