An ode to KK

[ursine cotcher]

Oh monarchs of
my misery,
pain,
and financial destitution,
where did we
go wrong?
In bygone days
our love
was strong,
now all you do is
punch my schlong.
Quietly
I cry tears,
putrid tears of self-doubt
and sexual
dissatisfaction.
Oh KK I hope
you die
in a grease fire,
before
my head asplodes.
BASTARD.


Party Poker - No Limit Hold'em Cash Game - $2/$4 Blinds - 6 Players - (LegoPoker HH Converter)

SB: $509.45
BB: $137.40
Hero (UTG): $400.00
MP: $684.39
CO: $400.00
BTN: $400.00

Preflop: Hero is dealt K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (6 Players)
<font color="red">Hero raises to $16.00</font>, 3 folds, SB calls $14.00, BB folds

Flop: ($36) 7[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] 5[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] 7[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (2 Players)
SB checks, <font color="red">Hero bets $26.00</font>, SB calls $26.00

Turn: ($88) T[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (2 Players)
SB checks, <font color="red">Hero bets $60.00</font>, SB calls $60.00

River: ($208) 9[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (2 Players)
<font color="red">SB bets $107.00</font>, Hero calls $107.00

Pot Size: $422.00 ($3.50 Rake)

SB had 9[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] 9[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (a full house, Nines full of Sevens) and WON (+$209.50)
Hero had K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (two pairs, Kings and Sevens) and LOST (-$209.00)

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Party Poker - No Limit Hold'em Cash Game - $2/$4 Blinds - 5 Players - (LegoPoker HH Converter)

SB: $342.41
BB: $400.00
Hero (UTG): $908.18
CO: $415.50
BTN: $470.60

Preflop: Hero is dealt K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (5 Players)
<font color="red">Hero raises to $16.00</font>, CO folds, <font color="red">BTN raises to $28.00</font>, 2 folds, <font color="red">Hero raises to $75.00</font>, BTN calls $47.00

Flop: ($156) 6[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] 6[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] 5[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (2 Players)
<font color="red">Hero bets $110.00</font>, <font color="red">BTN raises all-in to $395.60</font>, Hero calls $285.60

Turn: ($947.20) 2[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (2 Players - 1 All-In)

River: ($947.20) Q[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (2 Players - 1 All-In)

Pot Size: $947.20 ($2 Rake)

BTN had 5[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] 5[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (a full house, Fives full of Sixes) and WON (+$474.60)
Hero had K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (two pairs, Kings and Sixes) and LOST (-$470.60)

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Party Poker - No Limit Hold'em Cash Game - $2/$4 Blinds - 6 Players - (LegoPoker HH Converter)

SB: $775.30
Hero (BB): $693.90
UTG: $270.61
MP: $1,193.20
CO: $394.00
BTN: $145.43

Preflop: Hero is dealt K[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (6 Players)
UTG folds, <font color="red">MP raises to $8.00</font>, 3 folds, <font color="red">Hero raises to $32.00</font>, MP calls $24.00

Flop: ($66) 7[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] 8[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] 9[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (2 Players)
<font color="red">Hero bets $54.00</font>, MP calls $54.00

Turn: ($174) T[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (2 Players)
Hero checks, <font color="red">MP bets $32.00</font>, Hero calls $32.00

River: ($238) K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (2 Players)
Hero checks, MP checks

Pot Size: $238.00 ($3.50 Rake)

MP had J[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] J[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (a straight Seven to Jack) and WON (+$116.50)
Hero had K[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (three of a kind, Kings) and LOST (-$118.00)

-----------------------------

Party Poker - No Limit Hold'em Cash Game - $2/$4 Blinds - 6 Players - (LegoPoker HH Converter)

SB: $1,395.30
BB: $395.60
UTG: $419.00
MP: $1,488.55
Hero (CO): $723.50
BTN: $404.00

MP posts $6.00
Preflop: Hero is dealt K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (6 Players)
UTG folds, MP checks, <font color="red">Hero raises to $20.00</font>, 2 folds, <font color="red">BB raises to $66.00</font>, MP folds, <font color="red">Hero raises to $200.00</font>, <font color="red">BB raises all-in to $395.60</font>, Hero calls $195.60

Flop: ($797.20) 4[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] 3[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] Q[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (2 Players - 1 All-In)

Turn: ($797.20) 7[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (2 Players - 1 All-In)

River: ($797.20) 5[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (2 Players - 1 All-In)

Pot Size: $797.20 ($1 Rake)

BB had A[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] A[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (a pair of Aces) and WON (+$400.60)
Hero had K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (a pair of Kings) and LOST (-$395.60)

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Party Poker - No Limit Hold'em Cash Game - $2/$4 Blinds - 6 Players - (LegoPoker HH Converter)

SB: $487.50
BB: $290.75
Hero (UTG): $412.00
MP: $156.60
CO: $413.30
BTN: $117.65

Preflop: Hero is dealt K[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (6 Players)
<font color="red">Hero raises to $16.00</font>, 2 folds, BTN calls $16.00, 2 folds

Flop: ($38) 6[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] 2[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] 4[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (2 Players)
<font color="red">Hero bets $28.00</font>, <font color="red">BTN raises all-in to $101.65</font>, Hero calls $73.65

Turn: ($241.30) 8[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (2 Players - 1 All-In)

River: ($241.30) J[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] (2 Players - 1 All-In)

Pot Size: $241.30 ($3.50 Rake)

BTN had A[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] A[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (a pair of Aces) and WON (+$120.15)
Hero had K[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (a pair of Kings) and LOST (-$117.65)

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Party Poker - No Limit Hold'em Cash Game - $2/$4 Blinds - 5 Players - (LegoPoker HH Converter)

SB: $411.90
Hero (BB): $426.00
UTG: $973.40
CO: $422.40
BTN: $583.10

Preflop: Hero is dealt K[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (5 Players)
<font color="red">UTG raises to $8.00</font>, CO calls $8.00, BTN calls $8.00, <font color="red">SB raises to $44.00</font>, <font color="red">Hero raises to $120.00</font>, 3 folds, SB calls $76.00

Flop: ($264) 9[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] 9[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] 6[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (2 Players)
SB checks, <font color="red">Hero bets $170.00</font>, <font color="red">SB raises all-in to $291.90</font>, Hero calls $121.90

Turn: ($847.80) 7[img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img] (2 Players - 1 All-In)

River: ($847.80) 2[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] (2 Players - 1 All-In)

Pot Size: $847.80 ($2.50 Rake)

SB had A[img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] A[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (two pairs, Aces and Nines) and WON (+$433.40)
Hero had K[img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img] K[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] (two pairs, Kings and Nines) and LOST (-$411.90)